Baffled by sudden ghosting

[Forfucksake84]

I went on a second date last week with a guy I've been chatting to for 3 months. The last date was actually 3 months ago but I wasn't sure If I liked him after the first one. I kept meaning to meet up with him again but then things kept coming up on both our ends. He was 2 hours late turning up last week but other than that the date went well and I found I was surprisingly attracted to him this time. I invited him back for a cup of tea after a few drinks and we had a bit of a gropey kiss before we left and he asked when I was next free so I said this weekend. He's been chatting normally all this week. On Thursday he sent me a dick pic, saying I think you would have done a lot more than copped a feel if I'd stayed much longer. I replied saying that I was turned on but that I don't usually go all the way on a second date, and that as long as he didn't think I'd invited him back for that reason. He said absolutely not at all, he'd never assume that, but that he'd just got carried away. I texted him on Friday night saying 'it's OK I'll let you off lol. How was your day?' and he just hasn't replied or opened the message. No mention of the date we pencilled in or anything. He's been consistent with communication for the last 3 months! Any thoughts? I'm so baffled and so sick of this flakey confusing behaviour from men. It just makes my head spin

I wouldn't have waited two hours for him in the first place! Would accept 15-20 minutes max, with a good reason.
Put him in the bin and raise your bar.

OP you will remember this in 3 months time and think ‘what the FUCK was I thinking’ 😂

Why do you question yourself when some almost-stranger sends you a dick pic? You are questioning the values and morals of the wrong person here!

He lives 40 minutes away and you've only managed to meet twice and last time he was 2 hours late. And then he sends you a random dick pic?

He sounds really grim and flaky and I'm not sure why you seem to think he's a catch. He's really not

The dick pic and talking about him thinking you would have gone further is him sussing out his chances of getting his end away pretty soon. This has ZERO reflection on you as he is not viewing women he dates as humans who he wants to know about and care about so however you’ve been acting makes no difference if that makes sense? The alternative scenario to what you find yourself in now is you responded with something sexual, he either gets off on a some sexting exchange or he comes round and bangs you.. and guess what happens next.. nothing as he’s for what he wants. Please look at your self confidence and what you should level of respect you feel you deserve. I look back at times in the past where I’ve given it away to keep them interested and I really regret selling myself short, Im saving that for someone who cares about me and treats me with respect. The horrible thing about being ghosted is you don’t have any closure that’s why your mind in running a bit wild and telling you it was your failing, you’re missing the facts that he’s very clearly treated you like shit already but somehow he’s got you interested enough to want more. There are people out there who aren’t like this and you certainly won’t find them by putting out on date two xx

He's probably got loads of women on the go and you're not easy enough for him. Move on, he's not worth it.

What?!?! I'm sorry this has made me chuckle. He actually got it out????
He wants sex you deserve better xx

He was TWO HOURS LATE???

And you waited for him??

Girlfriend, raise your standards, get some self respect.

Yes he did seem quite obsessed with his cock. It did look enormous from the pic so he was obviously very proud of it. The reason I'm disappointed is that he seemed to be quite funny and interesting on the date and we seemed to have a few things in common. Men on the dating apps are slowly eroding my self esteem and making me feel like I'm not likeable enough or worth more than a shag. They all seem to be the same. I am 40 now and tend to date men roughly the same age. You would have thought they'd be done messing around at this age and would actually want some companionship and get to know someone but that doesn't seem to be the case. I'm really struggling to understand what goes on in their brains.

To be fair I don't drive so it kind of makes me feel I should be a bit more lenient if someone else is doing all the travelling. We didn't make an exact time, but we said roughly 6.30/7 and he turned up at 9

I would have blocked after the dick pic, gross.

“Frigid”, wtf?! It’s not the 1990s anymore OP. Stop with this misogynist, woman-hating language.

He sounds vile, count your blessings!

Block block block

I gave up OLD. I think it attracts the wrong sort of man, like they see it as a sort of ‘woman supermarket’ that they can use to pick and choose.

Also if they like you, they’ll wait for sex and not force the issue. Wanting to be respected is not prudish or frigid, and as you say, if they’re not done with teenage behaviour at the age of 40, that’s pretty poor.

Sorry, but this is doormat behaviour.

Did he even text or phone to say he was running late? I would have left at 7.30.

Anyway he sounds like a creep. Well rid.

I was at home waiting for him to arrive so I could go and meet him in the bar when he arrived. Yes he did text a couple of times but wasn't overly apologetic tbh

Get rid, forget, move on

I’m imagining him getting his cock out while you’re kissing, and honestly he sounds like a sex offender. Does he also wear a long coat and hang around in the park at night?

He’ll probably contact you in a month or so when nobody else wants to touch it. Please do not respond! You’ve dodged a nuclear warhead. Breathe a sigh of relief and don’t look back x

He got his own nob out while you were kissing on the second date? Criiinge.

He said it didn't mean for it to happen but that he just hot far too excited lol. It was flaccid though so I don't know quite why he got it out or what he wanted me to do with it!

So it just fell out?
In any case, sounds like a lucky escape to me

Damn...with each update your barr got lower and lower.

Op, Don take men back on date 2. I'm not saying 'women shouldn't', I'm saying YOU shouldn't. You ignored the 2 hour late red flag.

He sent you an unsolicited dick pick (illegal btw) and not only did you not block him, you're even wondering if you were frigid in your polite response.

There's clearly some mad desperation on the go op. Hey it happens but, you need to consider why your barr is low atm. It might be you need some refocusing on self love.

If they're more than 30 minutes late, leave. Or if you're inclined to let it slide, make sure you do several more dates without any red flags before any home visits.

Ah the art of romance, subtly and seduction - Here you go luv take a look at this beautiful sausage - that'll make you swoon. Er no, it's really not as attractive as you think. And is that what you think is your best attribute, all you have to offer? Well 50% of the population has that, just not all of them take pictures of it you utter weirdo. Also, that's just a photo, you might be absolutely useless at using it (highly likely as you're all about yourself). You may have played your 'ace nob' card too soon. Is that it?

Bloody hell these men need a lesson from previous generations on how to behave, the art of courting.

And 'a bit more lenient?' He was 2 hours late and no apology. Not on, terrible manners. If you are interested in someone, you show up on time, make some effort. This is such crappy, disrespectful behaviour.

Don't accept it as the norm ladies, don't stand for it. It's such a low bar.