Boyfriends response to pregnancy- AIBU?

[WhatIsLife24]

Me and my boyfriend have only been together for 6 months and I’ve just found out I’m pregnant (let’s leave the judgement about how early that is and the mess that it’s created as I’m well aware)
As the background: we live nearly an hour away from each other and we both have children from previous relationships, and we’re not even at the point of introducing each other to our kids yet.
He’s always said it would be a struggle if it happened but he’d step up and support me as he’s 100% sure about us.

Since it’s happened he’s changed his tune and doesn’t want to go through with it. (Probably the best option) but I am annoyed that’s he’s allowed me to get into this position and then changed his mind, and also annoyed at myself for letting it get to this.
He said it’s my decision if I do have it, however when I stated in terms of support the bare minimum I would need is his help after coming out of hospital as due to my medical history I would have to have a c section. So I asked if he could spend 2 weeks with me whilst I recover as I thought men got 2 weeks paternity anyway. This was just hypothetical if I did have it. Anyway he said he would want to but couldn’t do that because of his other kids as he has them 50% of the time and it wouldn’t be fair on them to not see them, or fair on the kids mum to expect her to change work hours etc just because he’s had another baby. So was my question unreasonable?! I feel a bit pissed off as I don’t feel like I’m asking that much in the grand scheme of things as I’m sure he’s been on holiday for 2 weeks before without his kids and I’m only saying as a one off. I fully understand after those 2 weeks he wouldn’t be here much at all. But maybe it’s my hormones and I am in the wrong?
I suppose his response answers everything I need to know about the pregnancy but I’m now questioning him as a partner in general.

YABVU

What an utter shambles.

How come you're so naive.

How old are you?
Because it's about time you grew up.

Ok lovely, looks like from what you have said that you are going to end this pregnancy anyway. Please be aware that some men will say absolutely anything to have bareback sex, I mean anything. He has shown that he will put the children he has already first, which is ok. Personally I wouldn't continue the relationship due to his future faking, but if you do please make sure that your contraceptive is iron clad.

Totally the opposite to me & DH. Same sort of timescale and he was overjoyed and proposed.
If he hadn't I'd still would have had my son.

Was that the first child for both of you though?

I think that's the difference here - both the OP and her boyfriend already have children which definitely changes things.

I've only read part of the thread. (Up to 1pm yesterday).

Have you been to his place? Is he definitely single?
How did you meet? Do you have people in common?

At 6 months in you don't know the real him unless you knew him before?

Be careful tying yourself to him.

Yes he was a prick for deliberately getting you pregnant then backing out. But a relationship breakdown can happen any time and getting pregnant early in a relationship makes it more likely. It also negatively impacts the kids involved. So yes we should teach our boys not to renege on responsibilities but more to the point I'll be teaching mine that having a baby with a woman you barely know is a disaster and no matter how much you want to 'step up' you have no idea how that woman will raise your child and how much input you'll have. You were both extremely reckless and stupid and thank god he's seen his mistake while it's early enough to save you and a potential child from the consequences of both of your actions. You're both at fault equally but you're the one with the consequences either way so you're the one who should reflect on why you did this to yourself.

You're asking if it's bad that he said he'd be fine about having a baby and now that it's happening, he's not. We'll, no, it's not good. Is he 50% responsible for it happening? Yes, but you as the mother are 100% responsible for carrying it and giving birth and the permanent effects of that, and also get handed the responsibility of being the main or even sole carer the child. You should of considered the situation, more than he has to bother with, as he can chose to be an absent father when it comes to it.
Despite your age, you got caught up in the honeymoon love bubble, came off contraception, and got done by a man who'd say anything to not have to wear a condom, and maybe even gets an edge from the risk ( some men do).
He could say he's as in as he likes but at the time, you should of taken account of you being 1hour apart and him being tied to the area for his DC's, so that would never change. If you ever wanted to live together in the future it would always have to be you moving to him. If that's not possible for you, then you didn't think very far as to how this relationship was even going to progress, let alone how you could possibly parent a baby together.

I wouldn't want to create an entire new human being with someone I'd been seeing for 6 months either tbh.

It's easy to say he'd deal with it if it happened, but that's not the same as actively planning and hoping for it. And I wouldn't have taken that as a green light to have unprotected sex.

What did he say OP, when you asked him why he had changed his mind after telling you he would be ok if you had his child, especially a daughter?

It was clearly going to happen, so I am wondering how far you had got with planning. Would you move closer to him? Blended family? Or keep things the same but him paying maintenance?

@feellikeanalien

Having said that if, he told you that he actually wanted a baby with you, then I do understand why you feel as you do

You think she would be running away not thinking ok then let's do it!!