What harsh words from others have stuck with you for life?

[blackbutterfly22]

''You really aren't very photogenic, are you?' (Said by my ex husband about 25 years ago and still haunts me to this day when someone takes my photo).

'You'll never find anyone again' . (Said when I got divorced 8 years ago and I truly now believe that there is something wrong with me as despite dating lots, no one seems to want to be my special person.)

Anyone have comments from others that keep rearing their heads throughout life?

‘God, you’re ugly!’ From my darling brother when I was about 15.

‘Wobblebottom.’ My father, who made snide comments about my weight until he died.

I’ve been single all my life. Not surprising, really.

"It's your fat arms..the veins are buried too deep."

Treatment room nurse at my GP surgery when I was a teen...having unsuccessfully stabbed me 10 times. She said that while slapping my arm ... half to get the blood moving and half because she was pissed at my fat little arm showing up her phlebotomy skills.

Because you're more sensible than me.
Two of my delightful mother's greatest hits:
'You look repulsive!' She didn't like what I was wearing.
'Don't think you're anything spécial, there's nothing special about you'.

She was sadly just parroting back what had been said to her as à young girl.

Two.

Once in a pub at the bar the guy next to me said "Excuse me, can I say something to you. You are the biggest dog I've ever seen."
Always been insecure about my appearance and nearly 30 years on it still hurts.

Second was a housemate who came into my room to complain about how much weight she had gained, how she was fat and disgusting and none of her clothes fit her "so can I borrow something of yours?"
I knew I was (still am) bigger than her but to know what she thinks of my size was really upsetting especially as she always told me I was beautiful.

Your sister got the beauty, you got the brains.

At university, having a "where is this going" type of talk with a guy I was casually seeing but really liked. I was expecting him to say we should make it official. He said, "Well, my friend says you are the type of girl that would be good to date... but not marry." (I had been on a couple of dates with his friend in the past.)

I remember I just burst out crying in surprise and hurt. It stuck with me for so long. Looking back, who gave them permission to judge me? I was a bit flirty, I guess, but I was sweet, pretty and kind, a good student (and at 20 years old, still a virgin). And now, in my 40s, seeing what a fun, dependable and faithful partner I have been to my husband over the years, I can say for sure that they were both wrong. I still have a lot of anger about that comment.

You have...
No Home
No Kids
No Car

Hope your JOB (because that's ALL you have) is enough for you.

You are in fact..
A sad lonely Old Maid who never had a man actually WANT to even LIVE with you!

That was from my sister dearest. Probably felt defensive after her husband divorced her for adultery.

I blocked the nasty bitch years ago and my life is so much better for it.

She didn't understand that I was long term single as I had standards whereas she'd take anyone who would have her.

'You are weak just like me.'
'If you learn to drive you will have achieved something by the time you reach 30. '
Countless more from my own fricking mother.

'Are you actually a man' said to me by a nasty kid at school.
Another time a group of boys were discussing kissing girls and one of them said 'Imagine kissing CobaltBlue' and they all went 'Ewwww' really loudly. 😔.

Various other ones but I think I have just blocked them from memory.

After a really nice bit of rumpy pumpy a girlfriend reached over and did a thumb to little finger hand spread over my penis and said. "Hmm can't play a piano chord on that one, my ex was hung like a horse"
Don't think I'll be forgetting that anytime soon 😚

Thousands wasted.

As a child I took keyboard lessons at school. I wasn’t good but was reasonable. Could play a few recognisable tunes etc. then I took up the cello. My beloved grandfather who genuinely was usually lovely commented to my mum when he thought I couldn’t hear, “I wish she’d stick to keyboard. She sounds like she’s strangling a cat on that.” I soon gave up the cello!

You have fat fingers, you can't play guitar - music teacher that I had admired - he played really nice. Primary school - never attempted another instrument after that,

"Your sister is the pretty one...but at least you got the brains."

Said to me when I was 13 by a relative 😢

What I 'heard' was, "you're very plain aren't you?"

Affected my confidence for my whole life.

I am so sorry. My auntie patted my thighs when I was about 17 and said...oh my. has stayed with me my whole life(I am 57) My mother used to say my sister could sing like an angel (no she could not, but she conformed and went to church choir) I now revel in the the fact that I can sing at the top of my lungs (hubby rolls eyes sometimes) but our kids caught me singing when I thought I was alone about 15 or 20 years ago. Our teenagers... "OMG MOM WAS THAT YOU.. you can SING" haven't stopped singing since. Poor husband and kids and grandmonsters now.

When my ex boyfriend said 'I'd like to see you find someone who puts up with your shit as much as I do.' Dumped him, met my husband 6 months later. Now got 2 kids. Last I heard ex still lives with mum and dad. He's 38.

My mother accusing me of having 'reverse anorexia' when I was 15

that is amazing!!!! you know you are amazing. We all are, just pushed down a few times..but we get UP!!!

Dancing teacher (when I was 14 years old and there wasn’t much of me) in the middle of a lesson said:
“ILoveNigelTufnel and ….. have lost weight. Oh you are good girls!”
WTF

“Best friend” at high school, when we were with a group of friends she was trying to push me out of said: “That’s mega crap. Haha ILoveNigelTufnel is crap.” No idea what we were talking about and it didn’t even make sense but I felt so humiliated that it has stuck with me. That and the time we were meant to meet to walk to school together and I ended up walking to her house because I was a bit early to find that when her mum answered the door, she had already left. We hadn’t crossed paths so she must have left really early to avoid me.

There’s a high number of other things she and other people have said over the years which have really stayed with me. I try not to but I feel pretty worthless most of the time.

your mother is a bitch. sorry. not sorry.

One time when I was about 10, I was talking too much (over excited). We were driving in the car. My dad lost his patience and told me to give it at rest and that it was no wonder that I had no friends and that nobody liked me. I'm now 43. It has affected my confidence in every friendship I've ever had.

Aged 10, non-school uniform day. I was so pleased with my outfit, I had put a lot of thought into it, but it wasn't on-trend and what everyone else was wearing. Nevertheless I felt confident. Best friend sidled up to me and said "I bet you think you look cool in that". I don't think I'd ever had the wind taken out of my sails as quickly. It's stuck with me decades later. I've had all sorts of truly abusive things said to me in the years since. If you hear it often enough, you do start to believe it. :(

“You were the worst decision I ever made.” My mother

Asking my mother if she was attending my primary school sports day.

"What's the point, you never win anything"

"My mate says you have no actual personality of your own." I was 14 at the time and struggling in many ways- this being one of them, I suppose. I'm still not sure what it actually means, not really - but was recently diagnosed with autism so maybe it's all related.

You're a big girl.