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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I am in love and it's making me miserable

232 replies

beansmum · 12/04/2008 16:58

I realise this sounds ridiculous but I am completely in love with a guy who I met again for the first time in 10 years last night. He is a friend from school in NZ who is in the UK for work. He is leaving again on monday, just to go back to work, not back to NZ and the thought of it is making me actually cry. Am I a complete freak? what should I do? I am seriously thinking of moving back to NZ to be there when he gets back. Tell me how to get over this please!

OP posts:
purpleduck · 13/04/2008 21:01

details
even

OverMyDeadBody · 13/04/2008 21:04

I guess as beany's not here posting she must be at least talking to the guy

I want an update!

dizzydixies · 13/04/2008 21:35

damn it, I have to go to bed as early shift in the morning AARRGGHHHHHHH

chocolatespiders · 13/04/2008 21:53

just caught up with this thread

he came back to yours last night WOW HE REALLY LIKES YOU... me thinks

noddyholder · 13/04/2008 21:59

omg so exciting have been following this but haven't posted.Can you put the pic up for me please as I am mega nosey and want to see him!You look lovely btw and your ds Good luk it sounds like you both like each other but are scared Good luck

dizzydixies · 13/04/2008 22:02

noddy he's lovely, I fear I may have a slight crush on him myself

hoping its all smoochy romance over a bottle of wine and thats why she's not on here

chocolatespiders · 13/04/2008 22:10

LOL- dizzy

littlewoman · 13/04/2008 22:28

Haven't read it all, but oh what a lovely feeling - new love. Hope it all works out for you beansmum.

QueenMeabhOfConnaught · 14/04/2008 08:45

I'm waiting for an update!!!!!

chocolatespiders · 14/04/2008 09:41

just logged on at work for an update...

will log in at home later to hopefully see some romantic gushing

ChipButty · 14/04/2008 09:49

Can't wait to find out what happened. Missed the photo though - descriptions welcome!

OverMyDeadBody · 14/04/2008 10:03

lol dizzy!

I hope beanie updates us soon...

Original poster
beansmum · 14/04/2008 10:17

nothing happened
He didn't come back last night, didn't even call to say he wasn't coming, must have been drinking with his brother. I'm a bit angry actually (but mainly just sad), he said he was going to buy shoes, have lunch and come back. Don't know where he is, don't have his phone number, don't know when he is supposed to be leaving but all his stuff is still here. I feel like an idiot, he must have realised how I feel and decided to stay away

OP posts:
SlartyBartFast · 14/04/2008 10:28

oh dear

emmy1979 · 14/04/2008 10:33

Not necessarily. He could have been drinking with his brother, started up the conversation about liking you, realised it's probably going to change his life and got a bit scared and nervous. He might be trying to work out whether to say something to you. Only know this from experience as I realised I had strong feelings for my dp and it took me two months to meet up with him, even though we worked in the same place! I was a single mum of ds1 at the time and when children are involved starting a relationship is daunting for either party. Please don't feel like an idiot.

DoodleToYou · 14/04/2008 10:38

Message withdrawn

Original poster
beansmum · 14/04/2008 10:43

I am quite angry though. I can't leave the house now because all his stuff is here and he will have to come back and get it at some point today. It's just rude not to phone.

I suppose he does have a lot to think about though if he is feeling even slightly like I am. Especially with his job and me having ds and not knowing if I would ever want to go back to NZ.

OP posts:
Meeely2 · 14/04/2008 10:48

if he has rung you before now, won't you have his number stored in received calls on your mobile?

Original poster
beansmum · 14/04/2008 10:51

He has only phoned my home phone. ds keeps asking 'when is your friend coming back', he has been keeping a lookout from the window since breakfast.

OP posts:
emmy1979 · 14/04/2008 11:09

It is rude not to phone - men have a very different (and impolite) view of communication. If you don't want to stay stuck indoors you could leave a note on your door saying 'Gone out, if you need your stuff phone ' Could be a good way of getting his number!

Just another thought - if the funeral he's attending is for someone he was close too his emotions (and common sense) might be all over the place with that too. He is going to a funeral isn't he? I'm getting myself confused!

Original poster
beansmum · 14/04/2008 11:17

yep, funeral tomorrow. Someone from work. It's hard to tell how he feels about it and I'm not sure if they were close but I suppose it will be affecting him.

I will have to go out soon, it's a lovely day, don't want to waste it. I'll stick a note on the door. I don't know what time he's leaving, hope I don't make him late by not being in.

OP posts:
MinkyBorage · 14/04/2008 11:23

Oh that's a pity. Whtever you do, don't let on you're angry though, you never know what the reason may be, I really hope he comes back with brilliant excuse and declares undying love etc etc

Paddlechick666 · 14/04/2008 11:36

don't over analyse his not returning yesterday.

honestly I think he's got totally bladdered with his bro and that's it.

He'll likely still be sleeping it off, sharing his bro's B&B.

I bet he had every intention of returning but it was probably very late by the time he realised he was way too drunk.

good idea to go out and leave a note.

Original poster
beansmum · 14/04/2008 12:19

he just phoned, he was very apologetic and is on his way back now. I don't think I'll say anything, just keep in touch and hope that he likes me enough to come back soon. I am going to cry when he leaves though, he will think I am an idiot.

OP posts:
MinkyBorage · 14/04/2008 12:28

Good luck