Husbands friendship group are cheaters

[Sunseasand1]

My husband has come back from a weekend away with friends and family last month, where one of the group ended up having an affair, which resulted in the end of his longstanding marriage, and a second friend cheated. None of this information was offered by my husband, who said he was trying to protect them.
I am certain my husband was faithful.
Problem being they are planning another weekend away with the group of girls they met, one of whom is now the new gf of his family member.
My husband is now the only member of the group with a wife, and doesn’t want to miss the weekend away with his family members, one of whom lives abroad. But surely I’m right to be worried and upset about this.

Can we just turn this around and imagine me and all my forty year old mum friends announce we're going on a trip with a bunch of 20 year old lads?! It's grim either way round.

This!!! So it's a lads trip... but with a group of women? Who aren't the wives of any of the blokes??? Hmmm.....

That you describe these adult men as "lads" says so much about them. I think I'd always have half an eye out that I might be the next expendable wife. Which is no way to live, I'd refuse to be involved. I outgrew my husband (he's not a "lad" type though) but you might be outgrowing him, if it's causing too much stress? Or that your morals just don't align as you move into that uncomfortable territory where friends start divorcing?

If you told your H his "boys trip" has obviously become a "couples holiday" and that you'll be joining him, how do you think he'd react?

Do you think he'd want you there?

If not, then you know his behaviour is planned to be inappropriate.

He should take you with him (happily) or he shouldn't go.

If this is true then wow.... The fact you found this out means your OH lied to you in the first place so how do you know he didn't cheat and these girls being other friends he can cheat with. I'd be going along or he doesn't go.

I'm assuming the group of girls are already an established friendship group and that's their reason for not inviting op as she'll be the only one not in a friendship group as such... but it's childish and ridiculous considering op's husband is in his 40s!!

Yes this is correct.

Your probably going to get jumped on now for calling people over 18 ‘girls’!
For some reason this is a big no no on MN 😁

your husband is going away for a weekend with his friends and a group of 20 year old women you don't know. bonkers that he thinks this is ok. it is pretty grim all around.

I think of myself and my own friendship group as ‘girls’ and we’re in our 40s!

Oh fuck that it’s even worse.

Dare I ask the venue for this trip?

IF this is real :

Fuck no.

My DH wouldn't even suggest this, it's beyond weird.

And wtf do women in their 20's see in men in their 40's?

And don't presume your DH wouldn't cheat. I thought the same about my first H. Guess what - he cheated PLENTY.

Just re-reading your OP. Sorry if I'm misunderstanding but he's going away with the "lads", some of whom have got their new gfs there and some who are single (but presumably trying to hook up with some of these younger girls who are tagging along?). So if your DH isn't going to cheat, why would he not want you there??

My DP would feel seriously uncomfortable with a load of his mates and their new gfs and just him on his own. He'd feel like a right gooseberry. Same as if I went on a girls trips and my mates invited their new boyfriends. Weird!!!

Unless... there was another reason for him going on this "lads trip" (which isn't actually a lads trip at all is it...)🤔

Wayne Linekers Grim Pool Party Club?!

This doesn't sound good.

Why is your husband keen to go on this trip?

YYY to all of this.

Oh wow this is starting to sound like an orgy! I would definitely invite myself along and prepare for the ultimate shag fest 🍆

There's not a fucking chance I'd be ok with my DH going on this trip

I think any woman in this group under the circumstances would be perfectly understanding if op came along (IF they don't have ill intentions regarding your partner that is).

They might not be particularly accommodating as yes sometimes women can be cliques. But they'd understand why you came and I'm sure, be pleasant enough at least.

So if hes trying to say they'd find it weird or not understandwhy you came, he's talking shit.

Gross. The ages and the entire thing.

OP seriously if your hubbie goes either fuck out his stuff when there or if you are that wet behind the ears at least have an online sti test ordered for his return. This is NOT normal married man behaviour.

You need to put it to your husband if he would like you doing the same meeting up with a group of stange men met through one of your girlfriends cheating on her husband.

Time to tell him to get his priorities right and take the person he's married to away instead.

I certainly wouldn't entertain it and been married 28 years.

Well said! If I was with a man who thought this was okay then he wouldn't be the man for me. Condoning that "what happens in vegas" type behaviour, thinking it's okay for him to stay with a bunch of random women without you, and the age difference. Grim as fuck.

@Disturbia81 I am the most gullible person but even I am not buying this. If this post is true I am going to stay single forever.

I'm confused. Some middle aged men are going on a 'lads holiday' with some 20 year old girls and wives are not invited.
Seems fine.

😂