DH just came into living room asking for sex...

[thea11]

He does this sometimes, typing it out is going to make me feel sick. He'll go and have a shower then come in the living room with a hard on and ask for sex. If I'm in a good mood I will (reluctantly) do it, but today, I've had a shit day, I'm knackered from work, I'm hot and sweaty folding up washing and still wearing my work clothes.

He swanned in late from work, I made his dinner in between putting both kids to bed (aged 4 and 9 months), and he comes home, eats his dinner knowing I'm pissed off from a hard day, then has the audacity to ask me to have sex with him!! WTAF!? - does anyone else's husband do this?

This may sound a bit obvious, so I apologise. But, have you told him you dislike this and that you want him to stop doing it?

My husband once came into the living room announcing that he was desperate to go down on me. In fact he said it in a cruder way than that but I can't bring myself to type it out.

unsurprisingly I declined.

Honestly most men are just fucking clueless OP. They have absolutely no idea what they're doing and fuck it up for themselves time and time again!

I do think it sounds like a sensible chat is key here, in the first instance. You should both be getting the same amount of time to relax so he should be picking up some of the jobs too. Can't he at least cook his own dinner?!

No, they know, they just don’t give a shit. So much less effort to just tell you what they want. Who cares about connection or intimacy anyway.

My friends husband actually said to her “if I put the bins out will you have sex with me?”

ewww

he's usually a very considerate lovely guy

He is? Really?

Works, eats dinner which you cooked, has shower, suggests sex

A true Prince 🤣

Why are you cooking for him, doing laundry, putting both children to bed on top of going to work? What does he do? Sounds like you have bigger issues...

Not just his own dinner! His wife and children's surely?

What you should have said OP -
‘ Yes of course, I’ll add it to my to do list. Unfortunately as it’s rather full, I won’t get to it until next week, possibly the week after. Ok?’

I’d be ok with that occasionally but it’s the lazy man’s way to initiate sex.

Its not about wanting “romance” per se, it’s about reading your partner; considering how they might be feeling, thinking about what they need, before pointing out your hard on like it’s a the most important thing in the room!

My revolting ex husband behaved like this. Yuk. And worse. Demand better OP.

I'd have looked at his penis and said "great another chore to add to my list".

I hope you got to enjoy a long hot shower.

Grimsville 🤢

And why couldn't he get his own bleeding dinner seeing as you were busy with the children...

Sorry but 😂

I suppose you could have said- Actually I need this laundry put away -you could hang a few of these socks on that and carry them upstairs for me. We might as well make use of it dear.

I hope he’s got his tail between his legs now. pardon the pun

Actually I need this laundry put away -you could hang a few of these socks on that and carry them upstairs for me. We might as well make use of it dear

🤣🤣🤣

I think if you're having sex reluctantly just to please him, then you're ignoring your own feelings and may end up really getting The Ick.

Sometimes it's fun to just have a laugh and shag, and a helicoptering of the willy or whatever can be an amusing start, but it is definitely a case of reading the room.

Does he ever take the time to get you in the mood, a bit of seduction, other than complimenting your body?

I would talk to him about what you need and about not making it yet another chore for you, as that sure isn't sexy. Is it all about him enjoying himself, or does he make sure you get off as well?

I'd also stop having sex reluctantly, I think it's bad for your emotional wellbeing and will lead to you resenting him. Enthusiastic sex is what to aim for.

Exactly, it’s like. My dick is hard. Are you going to do something about it or what?

I think I threw up a bit in my mouth. Gross.

This!!!! What did you make his dinner?!?! What was he doing in that time?

HAHAHAHAHA I'm taking this one to use. That's hilarious.

You have agreed in the past, so you have trained him his approach sometimes works.

You need have a chat with him on expectations, and him needing to pull his weight in the home.

If you don't pull him up on it, now long til he getting his piece polished elsewhere and tries blame you.

Why are you doing all the domestics and childcare? If he’s not as knackered as you then that’s a sure sign who is putting most in. Stop enabling him. Tell him to go fuck himself until he behaves like a grown adult with responsibilities.

That would give me the ick.

I Got the ick so bad on your behalf that I swear it’s now sealed shut for the winter 🤮🤢

This

Depends what time he gets back? I assumed it was like my dad, who generally ate later as he got in late from his v senior job (but to be fair he made it himself after he had helped with the rest of bedtime)