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Original poster

Who else has to ask permission to put the washing machine on?

236 replies

teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 20:17

We do have solar panels so cheaper to put washing machine on during the day.
When I've got mountains of washing, sometimes i just want to bung it on and try to get through it all. I have to say to DH "I'm putting a wash on this evening so don't have a go at me." He then tells me that it would save money to wait until the day. I understand this but as we have loads of washing at the moment, that's not enough to get it all done before school goes back next week. I've told DH that it's weird and old fashioned for me to have to check with him or ask him to put a wash on like I'm some sort of servant. I said that if he insists that I can't put it on this evening, then he'll have to manage his own washing this week so I can focus on getting mine and the kids done. Honestly, it's like living in the fucking Victorian age in this house sometimes with him being the head of the household.

OP posts:
Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:02

Justploddingonandon · 09/04/2024 20:37

We also have solar panels and I put the washing on whenever I like. I'm not convinced it makes much difference price wise anyway as unless the weather is shite the solar panels charge the battery and then washing machine runs off that if it's dark. In winter/poor weather we charge the battery overnight when it's cheap. What I do try to avoid is washing (and especially tumble drying) while cooking as that's too much load without having to pull from the grid.

Tumble dryer is the dream....! No tumble dryer here. Yes I agree that it's better to avoid putting too many appliances on at the same time with solar.

OP posts:
fromtheshires · 09/04/2024 21:02

No, we do more than one load a week, but when british gas were doing their half price Sunday energy we got three loads done on them days.

Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:02

AnneLovesGilbert · 09/04/2024 20:38

You know what my husband says when I put a wash on? Thank you. I do the laundry, everyone in this house is very fucking grateful for having clean clothes and linen and that’s the only way it’ll carry on happening.

Stop tolerating this.

Omg I actually hadn't considered this perspective.

OP posts:
Screamingabdabz · 09/04/2024 21:03

Why do sane women put up with this shit? Tight arse small minded wankers who know the cost of everything and the value of nothing. Ugh 🙄

Nettleskeins · 09/04/2024 21:04

I think this is one step on from husbands who won't allow the heating on.
It's a slippery slope.
You can tell your teens to make economies but not your partner. It would be like telling someone adult they had to take a bus instead of paying congestion charge. It sounds reasonable until you think about it.
You don't tell adults what to do with shared money, you discuss it neutrally in advance and come up with plan A and exemption clauses. let's shop at Morrisons but obviously if its urgent no one is going to dispute a visit to Sainsbury local and say why is this butter 2.80 not 2.10?

It is just disrespectful.

Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:04

2Old2Tango · 09/04/2024 20:39

Do you not have a quick wash program on your washing machine? How much washing have you accumulated if you can't get it all done in the daytime before next week? Were a family of four and I can easily get through several washes in a day.

No annoyingly. I can only do one wash a day because I have limited space to hang it out to dry. On a sunny day, it's amazing - several washes and all hanging out to dry in the sun! Ugh i'm such a loser

OP posts:
AGodawfulsmallaffair · 09/04/2024 21:05

teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 20:22

If I just put it on, he'll have a rant and then sulk.

Put it on go down the pub or wherever you fancy. Leave him to his little tantrum.

onemoremile · 09/04/2024 21:06

A load of washing in a D rated machine costs about 20p per load. I bet there are things he wastes 20p on which are far less beneficial to family life than doing a load of laundry for all the family.

AGodawfulsmallaffair · 09/04/2024 21:07

Saschka · 09/04/2024 20:50

This. I’d be going and running it with just one sock in, just to make the point.

Show quote history

A baby sock 😆

Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:07

m00rfarm · 09/04/2024 20:44

THe solar panels store the energy and you can use it when you want to, surely. Or are solar panels where you are different to the ones where I am?

That's usually right but there was no sun today so no stored energy

OP posts:
MrsKeats · 09/04/2024 21:08

teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 20:22

If I just put it on, he'll have a rant and then sulk.

Life is too short for this.
Heavens sake.

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 09/04/2024 21:10

God, I couldn't live like this. I'd just feel bullied in my own home.

Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:10

fromtheshires · 09/04/2024 21:02

No, we do more than one load a week, but when british gas were doing their half price Sunday energy we got three loads done on them days.

Wow that's good. We wouldn't have enough space to dry it all.

OP posts:
Saschka · 09/04/2024 21:11

teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:07

That's usually right but there was no sun today so no stored energy

Show quote history

It’s fucking winter, there’s been no sun for months. Does he expect you to avoid laundry until July when the sun comes back out?

pizzaHeart · 09/04/2024 21:12

I’m a bit confused why can’t you put washing on during the day?

Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:12

Ha I sometimes wonder. This thread has calmed me down. Does my head in.

OP posts:
Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:14

pizzaHeart · 09/04/2024 21:12

I’m a bit confused why can’t you put washing on during the day?

The opposite... solar panals mean it's cheapest to put washing on during the day. DH gets annoyed if I put a wash on overnight. Same with dishwasher. I put that on last night and he asked why. I said because I just want to wake up to everything being clean for breakfast. Fgs

OP posts:
pizzaHeart · 09/04/2024 21:16

teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:14

The opposite... solar panals mean it's cheapest to put washing on during the day. DH gets annoyed if I put a wash on overnight. Same with dishwasher. I put that on last night and he asked why. I said because I just want to wake up to everything being clean for breakfast. Fgs

Show quote history

sorry for unclear question:
Why are you putting the washing on at the evening? I would put it on during the day if it’s cheaper.

Fleurdalys · 09/04/2024 21:17

Passmetheaero · 09/04/2024 20:27

I’m in the same situation. Even worse, the stupid washing machine has WiFi and links to his phone and sends him an alert when it’s finished, so he knows when I’ve done a load even when he’s at work. Then he makes snide comments.

😳

Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:17

EarthSight · 09/04/2024 20:57

OP isn't this a larger issue? The fact that you seem to want or need his approval or some consensus, that you don't like the thought of displeasing him, that you don't want to experience the hassle of what he puts you through when you disobey something quite small?

We've never been on an equal footing since having kids. He likes to remind me that he earns more.

OP posts:
gamerchick · 09/04/2024 21:17

Alstreena · 09/04/2024 20:25

That doesn't mean one of you can't be prudent.

We have Economy 7 and have a timer so we can set the washing machine to come on at night.

Sorted.

Show quote history

Hello, fire hazard. I can't even go for a nap if the washers on.

Let him sulk. I would say let him do the laundry but he would probably ignore it and nobody would have clean clothes. Let him do his own.

Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:19

@pizzaHeart I'm needing to pop a wash on overnight so I can hang it out in the morning and have another wash on the go around midday. There's a lot of washing to get done..! We went away for a few days and that always results in an accumulation of washing.

OP posts:
Original poster
teacheroffsick · 09/04/2024 21:20

Ugh he's very controlling and it's tiresome.

OP posts:
MinervaMcGonagallsCat · 09/04/2024 21:20

Of course I don't ask permission. I'm an adult and I live my DH not my parents.

PaintedEgg · 09/04/2024 21:21

be petty and wait until daytime then make sure to not wash a single thing of his to get through the mountain of (your) laundry :)