Blocked after an intimate video call and now I'm panicking

[Worriedashell84]

So I got talking to a foreign guy on a dating site 2 weeks ago, a mixture of video calls and phone calls. There was never anything sexual the whole 2 weeks and in fact we were talking about lots of different things, like music , the meaning of life etc. He never once tried to get me to take my top off or anything the whole time. We were chatting most days as well.
However in the last video call, a couple of nights ago, things turned sexual. The app we used is end to end encrypted however in hindsight I'm now panicking that he video recorded it or has screenshotted stuff, especially now that he has blocked me.
I never took my bra or pants off , but I did show him my breasts a bit with my bra on ( I tried not to show my face in that but I can't be sure) and I did show my hand touching underneath my underwear a bit but obviously my face isn't in it.

At most there might be a picture of me with my bra on but showing my breasts and I also didn't show them both at the one time, if he has screenshotted that part.
I should say he was very aroused during the call and actually came during it. He also showed himself down there fully erect and coming. (Sorry if tmi, just trying to get all context in)
If it's a case where he realizes he just didn't fancy me and has blocked me, then fine, I can deal with that.
But if he has screenshotted stuff or recorded anything then yes I would be a bit worried.
So my question is am I jumping to conclusions and panicking needlessly? Would you be worried about this?

I only realized I was blocked today which was 2 days after the call. I can't believe how stupid I've been, I actually liked the guy.
I think the fact that he never tried to make things sexual for the whole 2 weeks made me trust him and actually it was sort of me who initiated it in the last call as I really fancied him. He also works in IT which makes me worry more as he is IT savvy.
I am never ever doing an intimate video call with anyone ever again.

So should I just forget about this awful judgement call and vow to never do anything like this again or should I actually be worried?
I think the fact that he has blocked me has made me think he has done or is doing something sinister.
Sorry for the ramble,, I'm just actually panicking this morning

So you’ve decided to totally disregard every person on this thread telling you the same thing?

I deal with scams all day long in my job and have done for over 20 years and this has every red flag box ticked - WAKE THE FUCK UP

Sounds like you are reassured by that but the reality is that middle aged, single parent women in the UK don’t scam or blackmail middle eastern men so he knows he has no reason to worry! The fact you accepted his response as reasonable is incredibly naive OP, please reflect again on everyone’s messages.

Can I just say to posters as someone who has been naive that if you're genuinely concerned about the poster, than insulting and patronising her isn't going to help. Not everyone has grown up with secure attachments and schooled in good boundaries, good self worth. If the OP hasn't got these skills it's not that she's dumb - she just hasn't had them demonstrated, or she has some form of trauma or poor bonds with parents/caregivers.

I hope you find someone nice OP. I would echo other people's concerns about men online being predatory (appearing nice though!). In addition, men from other cultures have nuances that you may not be well versed it so you will find it harder to read their words, actions and behaviours. If you have any Moroccan or arab female friends you can share with them your experience so they can help you. Good Moroccan men do exist but finding one might mean a LOT of heartbreak until you get there...

@Worriedashell84

We have all done niave gullible things mistakes we regret or not in our lives,

wise up and address whatever issues are behind your anxiety and low self esteem ect,

You deserve a lot better this this,

Just ensure you learn from this experiment and move on

You have had some good advice on here such as ensuring you block 🚫 him being able to possibly take advantage of this financial ect in anyway..

@Worriedashell84

I meant as in get required good therapy etc to address mental health issues..

‘Intimate’. The word just doesn’t describe what you and he have been doing. It’s not intimate at all.

I’m afraid you are a scammer’s dream target.
Single parent.
Needy
Love the “international” look. (/which seems very very important to you)
Gullible
Easily manipulated on camera.

And international Cupid couldn’t be more of an advert for scammers if it tried.
More red flags 🚩 than a communist convention.

Typo mistake experience *

This in spades. ^

I'm sorry @Worriedashell84 I don't want to have a go, but please listen to the posters warning you about this man. This is going nowhere fast, and will only end in tears. And please don't show anymore of your 'private bits' to him. (Gawd, I sound like my nan!)

Keep safe and keep well, and please avoid talking to men online in this fashion. And as has been said, this man is almost 100% likely to be after you for money. he is just buttering you up first. These men do NOT ask for money straight away, they get into your head first, and win you over.

PLEASE block this man.

Bless you OP it is natural to want a relationship and romance, but really what are YOU going to get from this? No real intimacy, dates, meals out and walks in the park, etc. Think about what you actually want and how feasible it is that you get this from a stranger online!? I worked for a high street bank for 4 years and the amount of romance scams you see... and I'm sorry but what you are saying sounds like a textbook case.

Write a list of what you want from a relationship BEYOND handsome middle-eastern looks and look to pursue that in real life. The more you talk to this man the easier it will be for him to reel you in. You deserve much better than this.

"the whole two weeks" reads very strangely - it's no time at all!

That's what I was thinking. Like OP's lost track of normality, thinking two weeks online chat with a total stranger is some kind of basis for a trusting relationship. It's nothing! Reset your boundaries, stick to them and keep your brain switched on so your fanny can't overpower it in a mad moment. It's a real waste having anxiety and not at least getting the benefits of being cautious!

He will feel bad as it is Ramadan

I’m finding it very hard to square an initial post of OMG ‘worried as hell’ what have I done, with subsequent posts defending someone who’s pushed boundaries at the least and is a cast iron scammer at worst.

Can’t find anyone with darker skin, hair and eyes that you could meet in person? Seriously.

I will look for a response though @Worriedashell84
When he ejaculated on camera for you to see, how did you feel about that? What did you say to him?

Very good point.

OP if he's genuinely everything you think he is this is still not a "relationship" with any future. You are using this dating site because you are a single parent, wanting a bit of company and are physically attracted to foreign-looking men. Why is he using it? I don't mean to be harsh but I bet someone here can tell you his next move - perhaps some mention of hoping to visit you, if only he could afford it?

I can't actually belive there are people this naive out there.

How long do we think before he asks for money for the sick dad or to come and visit?

@Tyughu

You have hit the nail on the head with your insightful good post,

I agree there's cities and towns that are multi cultural enough in UK,
you could like you say come across that Moroccan 🇲🇦 look..

How does one take a picture with their sick dad hooked up to a machine? Thumbs up? Smiling? Daily mail sad face? Is his dad awake?

I wouldn't bother personally unless I was going to Morocco or never wanted to meet him.

I also worry about the world ending over something that turns out to be small. Feel for you there.

Just keep an eye out. Don't send money or whatever.

OP, you can’t be ‘fond of’ someone you’ve never met and have spoken to online for a fortnight. Forget for a moment that, as pps have said, that this is a textbook scam — why is your judgement so poor? Why do you appear to find it praiseworthy that ‘he never tried to get you to take your top off’ for a whole two weeks??!! If you had gone on a couple of dates with someone would you also have viewed it as evidence of his gentlemanliness that he didn’t try to get you to take your clothes off?

Wanking on camera is not intimate.

Good luck with this. Perhaps it's one lesson you just have to learn. Don't send him money though. There's no guarantee that the bank will give it back to you if you have sent it willingly.

I promise I am not disregarding what you are all saying , I am very attracted to him and have a good connection with him conversation wise.
I won't be doing any intimate video calls again.
But really, until someone flat out starts asking me for money for something or blackmailing me, then I can't prove that he's scamming me .
As it stands, he isn't and we are enjoying thing whatever it is.
I am also open to seeing local people in real life as well.

With respect, OP, I think you need to go back and read all the advice from PPs because there are some excellent insights, some based on professional experience. Much as we can all appreciate base attraction, the RFs here are practically a Wind Farm. Please RTWT again.

Really where do you think this “ relationship “ is heading ? What are your age differences ? How long before he asks you to sponsor him for a visit to the U.K. ?

Have you seen his face on video?

I had to point out to a friend that she was being scammed. They always have a sick father it is worrying you have a child as you don't seem to be putting him first.

Must say I do find it odd that you have done this, when you also say you have a history of anxiety!

However you do really need to be super-vigilant now about avoiding any more contact with this man! As someone who lived for many years in Muslim countries, I’m afraid to say that even in the highly unlikely event that he doesn’t try to scam money out of you, he will almost certainly have zero respect for you after the way you ‘obliged’ him. Coming from a culture where unmarried young women are generally off-limits, sexually speaking, he was just using you for wank fodder.