Is it ok for the man to choose his kids over our new relationship

[MerryMember]

He had an awful marriage so did I , we met and it was amazing, since all his court stuff with his ex wife , he wanted the children full time . Only to get 1 full time . The wife is dating his mate . But he wasn’t great him self . There’s been a lot of stuff going on. He got custody of 1 and the others 50% since then it’s been so hard and less time as his work has been so busy . I got my kids to go to my soon to be ex husband 2 weekends a month to match his time . Which didn’t happen before . Now it’s been 2 years he’s now being difficult, cutting our weekends down . His mum has a lot of control . But is it unreasonable to have our time when I dont have my boys and now I’m the bad one for wanting our time without his child ? She is very needy and won’t leave his side . Which I find weird she makes me feel I’m in the way . But he doesn’t see it . I think he’s over doing it because of his last relationship with her mum . Fml it’s so hard with 5 kids . I always thought it wouldn’t change when we first met . How wrong I am I ? It’s causing problems, shall I just not say anything or continue to express my feelings?

I'd be worried if he didn't choose his kids over a new relationship

You're in the wrong. He needs to put his kids first. So do you.

What all the time? I get the kids are important and time with them , but when you feel in the way that’s not a relationship, I’m a child minder . My boys aren’t an issue but maybe girls want more attention?

Yes, all the time.

It’s been 2 years and I have put up with a lot . Just want a relationship . Not like my husband was

Do you choose men over your own children and their needs?

You played stupid games and won a prize that, turned out to be stupid.

life is hard with 5 kids. But that was a choice? You, personally, don’t have 5 kids. You could choose not to have 5 kids.

You aren’t the priority.

You will never have your needs met with him

Of course his kids come first. If he has his DD 100% of the time where exactly are you suggesting he pack her off to every other weekend when you're free?

He sounds a great dad for putting his children first. I would totally wait around and be patient for a man of that calibre. I would be a lot more concerned if he sidelined his responsibilities just for the excitement of a new relationship.

Kids come first end of.

Didn’t have all this stress and kids when I met him .

But is it unreasonable to have our time when I dont have my boys ah so it's only yo fit you? Selfish.

So 5 kids have come along in the 2 years you've been dating?

He didn't have any kids or he didn't have them full time?

You knew he had kids. A good parent puts them first.

I agree but it seems to me, he got me hooked and then dropped a bomb and I always have to adapt but he wouldn’t for me

You sound selfish and like you don't give a damn about the kids, even yours.
Yes, kids are a priority ALL the time.
He sounds great for putting his kids first, god I wish my kids father would do that.

I knew he had kids but they were they were with the mum

Kids first priority.
Always

He obviously cares for his kids, which is definitely a good indicator of a guy, but I do wonder if he might have some relationship trauma which would need to be given some time and effort if you get in a relationship with him.

How old are all the kids especially the fulltime daughter?

The easiest solution would be to quit whining and break up.

Saw the title and came on to say this

You don’t have to stay on that hook though

absolutely not , I was married for 20 and it was horrible as there was no time he got comfortable. No effort, maybe I’m hanging on to that ? When my boys go their dad’s I want to make memories with him