Dating thread 245

[SamW98]

Continued from 244….

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@Mckittens I'm 43 and I put 40 as my lower limit, as I think that anyone younger would be looking to have DC, and I already have 2, and am not desparate for more.

Upper limit is 50, as I feel anyone older would be too much of a different generation.

@blacksocks33 wishing you all the best for your date, hope it goes well!

No need for you to worry at all; it seems to be a women's only group to warn each other about predators!

mumofoneanddone I always assume that they just message everybody (anybody can message anybody on there) & then just take their pick out of whoever answers, they think that giving us 1 word will keep us hanging around waiting. Nope.

From the other side of the table, I have been told off for asking too much about someone and the next one said I didn't ask enough?
My previous girlfriend did say I was good at communication & I made her see that the the money issue in her marriage was not her fault.
Sadly we were just not in the same point in our lives that would have worked in a relationship, though we are still good friends and she is genuinely happy I have found someone else.
I think that I was brought up with strong women around me helped my view of the world be more rounded though my girlfriend does say I'm too reasonable 😁

I just think if someone send you an opening message and asks a couple of simple questions, surely it’s good manners to answer and not just reply ‘hey sexy’ or 👋

It’s like they want the woman to do all the work and they put in absolutely minimal effort.

It's a fine line, WtP
But when you get
'Morning'
'Good'
'Yeah'
'No'

As the first 4 messages, what is there to go on?!

I've dated someoneone 5 years younger and have a first date with someone 4 years younger than me tomorrow. I go for 5 years either side of my age though prefer younger .

I don't think tomorrow will turn out to be a good match. He seems very keen and has said he is nervous. He seems like a nice guy though. But I can't deal with too much insecurity in men.

I have encountered a new tactic by these amazing catches of men out there on Facebook dating 😂 they deliberately put the wrong name when messaging you. I’ve not had that before but had 3 do it so they must think they are extremely witty!! Idiots!

I'm in 40s and my age range is 30-49. I've not met with anyone much younger yet, but have a date lined up with someone 10+ years younger.

I'm in my 40s and generally keeping dates/chats with men also in their 40s. I genuinely don't see what a younger man would want with me and to be blunt, I don't want a bloke in his 50s.

@blacksocks33 hope your date goes really well!

Whilst I like the look of some the younger profiles that I'm being offered since I lowered my age range definitely not sure about being the older woman so I've given them the swerve so far.

Totally agree, though I have had women do the Hi, Nice & Cool answers?
Oh and one who stared talking about us having to use condoms on the second day of messaging!
Suffice to say we didn't meet for a date.

I've never been or even dated much older or younger guy, but I'm open for a right person. I had age limite at first 40-53, but changed it now for a bit younger for a while. Even at a younger scale, some of them could pass for being in their 40s!

I’ve only had 4 relationships and they’ve all been around same age as me (youngest was 18 month my junior oldest 4 years my senior) and so I’ve never experienced an age gap relationship.

Well I’ve been patient and taken my time with Mr J because of his dads funeral and then he’s just sent a message calling me a different name so looks like I’ve wasted my time 🤦‍♀️

Oh no @SamW98 that doesn't bode well! Have you asked him about it or just leaving it?

I sent a normal reply then at the end put - btw I’m not xxxxx

He’s responded straight back apologising saying he’s had a long day.. I’ll call it a pink flag rather than a red one but I’ll definitely be more wary

@Mckittens i also lowered my age range and was wary tbh. But have been on dates with 2 guys 7/8 years younger. One was nice but different stage in life. Other one is going well, I have now forgotten the age difference. His life is more together than mine!

Let's hope it's just a tired reply from him!

Thanks so much all! I've just got home.
I thought I'd only be there a couple of hours but ended up being out for 5 😂
He was so lovely and genuine and chatty and polite. Someone who talks to you making eye contact.
Trying hard to not get excited, but I think it's too late for that.
I'd love to see him again 🙈🫠💀

Good! Happy for you! Success stories always welcome to motivate the rest of us

Ooh that sounds very promising, hope it continues going well ❤️❤️❤️

Sounds great @blacksocks33 hope it continues to go well did you arrange a date to meet again?

The men are not really interested on bumble as the lady has to message first. It’s just validation for them. That has been my experience. The men take longer to reply on there and never make any conversation.

Black socks - wait for the next date before getting too excited as you said. These men are good at putting on that ‘lovely’ act and then you never hear from them again or even worse they indulge in the texting and never asking you out again game.