Can't believe we are approaching a 1000 posts on this thread soon!
For me Bumble has been really good in terms of variety and choice, though at one low point I registered on Tinder. Only looked at it for one day, it was some kind of UGLY PARADE. I honestly never saw so many scary men put together in my life, with most I couldn't swipe left quick enough before my eyes start bleeding!😂 So I have a profile on it now but it's hidden and I doubt I will come back.
I have actually found an iron who I really really like in the last week, and I haven't been that excited about someone (and relaxed and at peace as well!) since forever! HOWEVER. There are legitimate reasons why we can't meet soon, and even though we have talked on the phone (I think it gives you a better idea of the real person compared to chats...I actually can't say I particularly was drawn to his voice but thankfully I didn't dislike it either) I am so worried about this "false intimacy" thing. Or rather comparing him to other matches I can tell that the intimacy is real, it's strikingly real at times, but it's the sexual chemistry thing (or potential lack of in real life) which bothers me. I mean it could be a problem for him, too, he is younger than me but also looks a lot younger than his real age 😬
Out of his 5 pics I found him attractive in one, with "potential" in another, neutral/not fanciable in others. I mean mentally I am so attracted by now I feel like he could turn up looking like a Quasimodo and I am not going to care. However who knows, in real life?
Compared to my previous OLD date I swiped on the guy thinking I just liked his face but he had such a brotherly vibe I didn't think there was sexual potential, but decided to try it out because so many people said a man can grow on you including sexually. But it turned out to be like I sensed beforehand - we are still friendly and exchange occasional messages but obviously couldn't go further for me...
@SamW98 you said you had someone you really got on before the meeting and when he walked in it was a "oh no" moment, was there any indication looking back that it could have been the case? Were his pictures different from real him? What exactly produced the oh no effect?
Did anyone have it where the lack of spark took you by surprise compared to relative attractiveness in photos?
My iron mentioned that his previous GF demanded he lose weight and I think his pics could be before he gained weight or at least at the angles where you can't see (and no full body ones). I am bothered by overweight though myself am very much in the top 1% of healthy BMI for my height (but I gain weight everywhere evenly apart which makes it better apart from my face which is the last to give up any extra puffiness even in periods when I am very slim, which is pretty crap)
However he used to be an amateur athlete, even if several years back now, and I think if anything body/weight is the easiest thing to change, I have a feeling wanting to impress me he's already thinking of making changes to his lifestyle to include more sport etc...