How I feel about men in my 60's.

[Gettingbysomehow]

I don't feel I am half a person waiting for the other half to fulfill me. i am a whole person and don't need anyone else.
I've been married and divorced three times, all of my husbands drained me and marriage never sat easy on my shoulders, and this is why.
It's only taken me 60 years to realise this.
Anyone else feel the same?

To anyone who doesn't like to acknowledge that they are the common denominator for most of their problems.

As a pp said, i can't be arsed anymore (at 60)
I've become so disengaged from it all.. really feel i've better things to do with my time!

It is sad how quickly i observe men my age moving on after being widowed or divorced, obviously they cant be by themselves, poor buggers!
I find it a bit pathetic tbh..

That is a really good analogy of both drugs and blokes!

I’m married to #1 and he’s a keeper, but he took a LOT of finding, and quite a bit of training, and I’d not bother again. I’d get a dog instead.

Rubbish! There was someone on here where her first two husband's refused to lift a finger and her last one ran off with another woman - how is that her fault?!

Same
Not a bloody chance!

I read that men marry for sex and someone to cook and clean, typically within 2 years.
Women marry for money/ stability.

I'm minted so hard pass

"I cannot for the life of me fathom why people bother with relationships. Except for raising children I guess" @Augustus40

I'm sure in terms of evolution that makes total sense. Once we have been through menopause and are infertile, unless you want an active heterosexual sex life and a live in partner, there is no evolutionary imperative to be with a male partner any longer. I'm sure that's why a lot of older women aren't bothered.

Fucking brilliant

My FIL said about a year after my MIL died, gosh I know why MIL moaned about all the cooking, it never stops - a long rant ensued.

She had cooked and served him 3 meals a day for 50 years. 50 years and only when she died did he appreciate it.

Well out of my 3 divorces the 1st husband was a lazy alcoholic 2nd man quite stable just nothing in common. 3rd husband height of selfish and nobody liked him.

I was much younger before those relationships. I had ds aged 41. His dad we never married. Brought up ds together but separate.

I don't think I was very lucky and also had bad taste. Oddly enough even the 2nd one he had a further divorce.

I slowly grew to appreciate my own company. Fs is nearly 19 and at age 60 I won't bother with relationships. I do have a few platonic men friends though.

So no I was not the common denominator!

Ds not Fs.

It’s not, but I’d not marry a lazy pig in the first place.

At 55 I wouldnt mind the occasional bit of sex as that’s literally the only thing I about being in a relationship. But I don’t miss it enough to want to go through dealing with a man to get it 🤣

51 here. Out of a 25 year relationship nearly 4 years ago. Been on many dates...but theres slim pickings tbh. Men with a lot issues..1 still living with parents at 51...ugh...i just feel its either they act really old ..or never want to grow up .no in-between. Its exhausting and disappointing. Theres a reason theyre single imho. I found they just want someone to do housework...cooking and they want to be pandered to. Ive lost interest in dating atm. Im happy alone..

I think also in the days when woman couldn't inherit and the family home and money went to the men they had little choice.
Also lack of pensions, married women's stamp etc

Yep at 55 I’ve found men my age fit into 1 of :3categories

• they’re chasing women 10/20 years their junior convinced they’re Tinders answer to Brad Pitt.
• They want a replacement wife to cook clean and wipe their arse.
• They want no strings sex and to talk dirty within minutes of matching.

I know there is the odd good one but it’s like doing a bush tucker trial wading through a rat infested swap to find the one star well hidden.

@Outliers your comment has a hint of misogyny!
Posters have been married a few times, and because of that they're the problem?
Maybe, theyve made bad choices or realize at some point that being alone isn't scary, or maybe theyve raised kids who have fled the nest and dont need to stay together for the sake of the family, or widowed etc etc..
No need to patronise the posters on here thanks!

Im heading to my 40s and ive been single for 10 years and love it.
I couldent be with anyone men to me are just looking for a second mum to do their work washing cooking cleaning.
And the mess they make the clutter they get the moaning. And the need for sex i hate it never liked sex so im missing nothing.
I love being on my own and no plans to change it.
Mind you i only ever had to past relationships first one abusive forced sex. second one utter clutter mess man child sex mad.
Ive never been married so thats a positive id rather eat toe nails than do that.

NEVER EVER AGAIN WILL I HAVE A RELATIONSHIP.

@SamW98 , my ex actually asked me if i'd wipe his arse for him when he got old, guess what my reply was?
8 months after i finally ended it (12 year relationship) he got together with someone i know, and who i believe will do it for him.. fair play!

As the poster in question, I think you underestimate the ability of men to stop doing anything as soon as the ring is on the finger, because now they have a wife (who, quite clearly is so lucky to have them that she's not going to go through divorcing them, is she?) they no longer have to pick up their dirty laundry or carry plates through to the kitchen.

They don't all start off as lazy pigs, you know. That's how they get women.

Funny enough my last ex - who I only dated for a couple of years - is now with someone who works as a carer for the elderly.

Looks like he’s already got his arse wiper lined up 🤣

I started thinking this way in my late 40s... and I've never even lived with one!

😂funny that @SamW98 what a coincidence!

You should hear how Scandinavian and Polish women report their experiences of British mens expectations of their partners.

So extrapolating from that, do you think British men are exceptions in Europe/Scandinavia?

Yes true. I’m rather ‘difficult’ (according to my long list of ex’s) as I am pretty intolerant and I’m not compliant for the sake of peace. I’m not saying you are, as binning them off is def the right move!

I’m 67, married and divorced twice, three AC (and GC) with 2nd husband, who is a dear friend.

My last relationship started 20 years ago with a man I’d known a long time. I adored him but was intellectually and socially inferior, our respective teens knew and loathed each other. It lasted four remarkable years. He moved away with a new partner and they were happy - until he died suddenly.

I cherish many memories but I will never again surrender any part of myself to anyone. My home is my sanctuary and is closed to everyone but my family and my pets.

Men - whether controlling or needy, demanding, egotistical, unfunny, and most of the time quite unappealing, are unnecessary and unwelcome intruders in my happy privacy.