Is anyone awake? DV

[Isanyoneawake44]

The police have taken my husband into custody not long ago, I have to stay awake so they can come back for a statement. Its DV related. He's also in the army.

Does anyone know what will happen now? We own the home jointly, will he be allowed back here?
I think I did the wrong thing, I can't do this.

I've got 3 children at home, no local support, am pregnant and have to make it through tommorow on no sleep.

The thing is leaving is just not easy, they make it petrifying and it's hard. I know this is the calm before the storm for me and it will get harder

Yes. I made the mistake of letting mine back into the house to collect some possessions after we'd split up, and I was the victim of a serious sexual assault as a result.

Be careful, OP.
If he needs to come back for his stuff at any time, make sure you're out or the MP are there to supervise.

Hi OP - how are you and the children getting on?

We're OK, finding pregnancy tough, hit the everything hurts stage now. Settling in well to our new normal although feeling lonely tonight but I am really really tired.

How are you?

I'm fine, thanks.
I'm glad you're doing well, but sorry your pregnancy is hard going now you're towards the end.

How many weeks are you now? Good to hear your all doing OK

Hi op so sorry your suffering the terrible aching I suffered it with all my 7 pregnancy's it will pass I'm so happy to here your doing good please keep strong

Thank you, 3rd trimester now. I think I need to keep moving a bit like a rusty old tin man, bit of WD40 maybe!

Its been a productive week anyway. I can't believe it's already been a month, I can't believe the difference at home and in the children.

I can't believe it's already been a month, I can't believe the difference at home and in the children

Yes, do you remember how you posted about the children's behaviour to start with? I'm glad they're calmer and happier.

I do, I had a read back. It seems very surreal.
I do feel this is the calm before a.huge storm so trying to enjoy it

OP I know you don’t want to think about it but divorce is the only way forward.
Your kids and you now live in a home which is safe and you aren’t frightened. You’ve said it yourself that the change in them has been unrecognisable
Nothing and no one is worth changing that sense of calm .

Oh yes, it will be a divorce and I feel really calm about that decision it's the right one but obviously he doesn't know that's coming just yet and that's when i think it will get extremely stormy (again!)

Ah well the energy has begun to change... he's started trying to add/follow my friends on social media and is liking historic photos of me on there overnight. Ones of just me, not 'us' or the children...

Get them to block him. Report any pics he likes... My exh did similar.. Feels quite violating imo. File for divorce and don't look back.

Outrageous.

Tell your friends to block him.
They usually do this. Luckily FB hadn't been invented when I left my ex but I can imagine him doing the same as your ex.

Yup, I have good friends. They have blocked but just wanted me to know

That's good.

So the police confirmed a lack of evidence on their part, and I cannot face anymore or a trial etc so it looks like it will all be dropped which is okay... that's fine

But the occupation order has to go with a non molestation order apparently and I need to get the ball rolling on that which is going to open the flood gates I fear, make life harder and to be honest I'm not sure if I can do it all

I am absolutely exhausted 😩

..............and to be honest I'm not sure if I can do it all

You must. I completely understand your reluctance but you have to carry on with the divorce.

You have to, for your own sake and for your children's sake.

I really don't feel strong enough.

I want to just pick everything up and move away, start again somewhere else

Do you mean with your husband?

Gosh no, absolutely on my own with the children

Ah sorry, I misunderstood.
Apologies.

It's very tempting to daydream about removing obstacles. Like awful husbands.

It'll be over eventually. Try to stay strong.

Have you thought of anyone to be with you when you have the baby?

I'm actually really excited and empowered to do it on my own as I used to work there so I know everyone it will be nice I think