Dating Thread 244

[SamW98]

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@2anddone @RosieAway thank you both. I agree, the messages went on far too long and you end up sharing too much. I wasn't expecting him to crumble and be so defensive... literally had an answer for everything. It reminded me of my ex instead of listening to me if I raised something he was forming his counter argument. The word "sorry" doesn't come into it. This app guy said he wasn't good at communicating by messages (which I had also said) but he hadn't felt on form to chat. I just replied back saying I had hoped we might meet and it seemed we had misunderstood each other in our messages and hoped he would feel better soon..but nothing from him.
Another my way or the high way guy...better to know that now then have a relationship where I have to walk on eggshells...

@Loopylooni I think he did intend to meet but then actually didn't as in the notion that it's nice to think you have someone in the background...but you're right, time waster.
Thank you for replying.

I’m in the Midlands so if there’s anyone to avoid please feel free to DM me. I’ve discovered a friend whose wife doesn’t know he’s on dating sites and an ex customer whose wife also doesn’t know he’s on dating sites.

I may be very naive, but a picture of a blokes legs with one sock on and one off …. I get where the cut off point at the top of the legs, but one sock?!!

Being unavailable to call/meet is a big warning sign they are not single too.

I chatted to a bloke from Coventry a while back. Bit of a silver fox and quite a charmer but the distance was just too far for me. He was an N

@Livelifelaughter

Sounds like he was up for meeting but the time lapse cooled his keenness and hes not honest enough to say so.

Don’t waste any more time on this one

100% this ^^ , he’s lost interest in meeting in you, sorry

@Livelifelaughter this is why I don’t give any of myself until I’ve met someone. I don’t even give them my number now.

Meeting up with the guy I have been talking to on Saturday going to the cinema and out for dinner after, we are now speaking on the phone for about 2 hours a day and getting on very well.....think we are definitely just friend zoned but guessing if anything is going to move on from that it might on Saturday...Will keep you posted!

Speaking on the phone for 2 hours a day😱
Who's got time for that?

If you are just friends do you speak to all your friends for 2 hours a day?

@2anddone

Ill be honest with you, with the previous guy why you exchanged 100’s of messages and now this one with 2 hour daily calls, my concern for you is you’re getting far too invested too quickly with these guys and that it will always end up with you feeling disappointed and let down.

2anddone Is this the same one who you met before?

Nothing going on for me, nobody nice on Bumble, or the other one anymore. That's it, that's all there was for me

Yes it's the same one I met before.
To the previous poster yes I do talk to my other friends for long periods of time each day I often have them in loud speaker while doing bits around the house/ferrying my kids around...they are teenagers so don't talk to me much same as my other friends so we chat to each other!

2anddone My kids are 7 & 10 & I still can't have a wee or post on here without one of them saying 'What you doing?'

I hope Saturday goes well. I know he has his reasons for messing you around before, but just be mindful of your own feelings & take care of yourself

Believe it or not there will come a day you miss the constant chat and inability to leave you alone 😉🤣
Thank you although we have chatted a lot I have kept my feet firmly on the ground and not expecting anything romantic to come from it...I always had a best mate who was male growing up until he got married and his wife got weird so has been lovely to have someone to chat to and have a laugh with.

@2anddone do you need more friends and/or would be happy with him as a friend?

@User990 I really would be happy with him as a friend...I think I would probably prefer it!

@2anddone dinner & movie sounds very date to me but report back how it goes.

Will do...I love this thread for its support thank you

The guy with the cold has returned with a very simple ‘how is your week?’ sent to me this evening.

I dunno if I can be arsed with him. I’ve not heard from him since Saturday.

@JH20000 after saying “let’s leave it there” ? Give me strength. It seems to be a pattern to check if you’re still “there”. Unless he’d expressly written that he was sorry, feels better and comes up with a time and place, I’d leave it too. IME they don’t change like that

@JH20000

Id be tempted to reply with 👍

It does sound to me like he’s chatting to others and keeping you on the back burner

So, I have a coffee date scheduled with a woman who I have been chatting to on the HER app- we'll call her Ms Gig :)
I've been very up front about my current situation (separated but cohabiting with my ex) and that I'm only looking for something casual, and fortunately that's what she wants too, so I'm hopeful!
It's not until next week but I wish it was sooner- she seems lovely and we have quite a bit in common 🙂

Just found this thread been single over a year. Met a couple of guys. A whole lot of pen pals! And one complete crazy who I reported to the police be careful people not everyone is who they say they are!
So recently been on date 3 with a guy I met online months ago but we were more friends at first. He suggested another date then tried to change the day we were meeting( which I couldn’t do) Now he has gone a bit quiet the last few days. Thoughts anyone?
I feel he is more a friend with benefits but he is very cute when we are together. More so than me! But to my surprise I do actually like him!
The things I find hard with dating is sporadic contact.
Not knowing where I stand.
The effort/time of messaging someone for weeks sometimes then it’s all a waste of time!
Recently deleted the apps for this reason. But will probably go back again!

Hope it goes really well don't forget to report back!