Help me understand what I’m seeing (H’s behaviour related).

[FrogFighter]

Together for 24 years. Married for 20. DS 15 and DD 19.

he left 6 weeks ago.

saw his rented house today.

bar table in front room with fully stocked beer fridge
all black and grey
pictures of DJs and music related visuals in black frames on walls
one photo of DCs in frame when very small
only other photo is of H on stag do 25 years ago with mates
‘joey and chandler’ armchair
black leather sofa and big TV
FROSTIES in cupboard
24 cans of tango in kitchen
polyester 90s bedding with black and white zigzags
plans to put a pool table in garage

what have I experienced?

Did you take him an 18th birthday card?

why did you go round to his rented house?

Reliving his youth

To pick up my son. We are still married!

Be glad you're rid of the massive idiot. What a tit, I'm actually embarrassed for him.

Lol

Whatever it is I’d stay well away and not go round there as it will only annoy you.

You’re better off focusing on yourself and your future without him in it.

On the plus side, you'll never feel attracted to him ever again. What a tit.

Apart from not having many photos of the kids it doesn't sound that bad.

Men ( I am one btw) don't give a shite about interior design.

I prefer crunchy nut..

Sorry for what you are going through of course.

Mid life crisis? Poor taste in interior decor? Ick either way.

I think it’s the picture of the stag do and the pool table. I did say ‘oh look there you are with your boyfriends’. Couldn’t resist.

This. You deserve, and will find, a guy that doesn't score a near 9 on the twat level.

It's to wind you up, and it seems to be working. Next time you pick the children up stay in the car and call them, otherwise he will start leaving a lipstick out or two wine glasses etc. Don't engage.

Don't need a psychiatrist to realise he's trying to relive his 20's. He'll just look a bit sad.

Your best bet is to move on and be happy and independent, "Living well is the best revenge".

It’s not. He doesn’t have any reason to wind me up. I cause him no trouble at all and am quite supportive, though not so supportive of his time hop back to 1997. He is carrying the guilt as he wants to party and socialise and I am now at 50 waaaay past it.

A very sad and desperate man trying to cling onto his youth. Does he have a comb over too?

Completely bald

I think 50s with teenage children needing much less hands-on parenting is a terrific time for socialising and partying. I’m having a much busier time socially than I did when younger. But it does sound like he has really regressed.

I get the impression she’d be suppressing laughter rather than being annoyed… 🤣

Midlife crisis.

I agree and was happy to let him go and do whatever he wanted to do. But that wasn’t good enough. He wants to date fun, party women. And by that he means fun party women WHO ARE NOT ME. Caveat.

It's a bit of a cliche but it's not harming anyone so 🤷‍♀️

Strong Kirk Van Houten 'Can I Borrow A Feeling' vibes

I don't know why people have to be so mean. They spent half a life together!!! Everybody goes through stages in life. I don't know the circumstances under which they ended up separating but they're still married. Obviously co-parenting. Call it whatever u want mid life crisis or he's grieving his youth. Maybe he's scared thinking how much time he has left, who knows. It's a stage he has to go through. Maybe professional help is needed.

Take him an appropriate (1997 time sensitive) housewarming gift!