A thread for those of us who have realised our partners are not so bad after all....

[Janni]

..so we would like to practise being nicer to them! I managed a week without saying anything sarcastic or critical to DH.

This week I'm also trying to be more affectionate to him, rather than just hugging the kids!

I feel happier and the atmosphere at home is much better.

I have ben kissing dp more the last few days as i realised wuite how much it had slipped! I have even initiated some loving!!

Is there something in the air? I have been making more of an efort the last week or so and it has definately been a much happier atmosphere.

This is the start of a new week, so I shall be following in from my efforts last week. This week I'm going to try and not take the piss out of my partner's driving (this is going to be very difficult!!) and I shall also try and cook more, as I can't really use the excuse of bad smells bringing on my MS anymore as really they don't.

good timing on this thread! i know several people who hve crap partners - i don't just mean they won't do the ironing, i mean these are quite nasty angry bullies (no phys violence tho). my partner is caring, funny down to earth, he respects me and loves me and i really enjoy his company......i'm so thankful to have him. he's a good egg.
we all get fed up with our Dp's at times but really i'm sure in the grand scheme of things they are good blokes and fathers.

My bf pointed out how lovely and devoted my dh was. Shame I needed her to tell me. Must try harder to appreciate him more.

shall we do a week-by-week challenge, Janni? eg one week no criticism, one week more affection etc until it builds and builds and they explode with appreciation? Just kidding, I mean, it really helped me knowing it was a challenge last week.

That's what I'm trying to do, Scattercushion, but I wouldn't presume to tell anyone else how to do it - I'm no expert! I know if I try to change lots of things at once I tend to give up, so that approach works for me. So this week I'm going for - no sarcasmor criticism and more physical affection.

lol at them exploding with appreciation. I'll just be lurking this week, but will join in again next week.

i am just out of a years long depression during which i have been so horrid to my dh. in reality he's lovely and tries his best. he cooked me a others day dinner last night (timing about an hour late, but hey he tried!) and bought a bottle of wine he know I liked and we ate it in front of a dvd i 'd wanted to see for ages. i do love him. hope he realises it

Oblomov - at first I thought you were saying your boyfriend pointed out how devoted your husband was

My DH is a star. He loves me, tries to make me feel good about myself all the time, goes out of his way to show he cares about me. I actually got round on Sunday morning to telling him just how fantastic he was. Because he is.

But I'm still not 100% happy with our relationship . My problem I suspect, definitely not his.

DH didnt know what had hit him last week tho we do have a very loving relationship anyway.

When he got home I made him a cup of tea and told him to go and relax and it was fine if he wanted to go on the computer. I told him I would sort the children out with tea and bath and bed and he could chill out!!

He was very and wanted to know what was going on and I put my arms round him and told him how much I appreciate how hard he works, and that I loved him loads.

We had such a lovely week together and I didnt criticise him much at all.

Am going to do the same this week too.

Is anyone 100% happy tho Orm? what do you think your problem is your relationship?

collision - I hijacked someone else's thread last week whingeing about my marriage and I don't want to do it again . But suffice to say it comes down to mid-life crisis I suspect. And a feeling that there is a wild and exciting life for me out there...which I doubt very much.

Our house was a lot happier for me curbing my moaning last week, so I'll give the more affection thing a go this week - good idea.

What a nice thread.I had a lovely Mothers day yesterday. DH was so sweet, we had breakfast in bed the 3 of us and went out for lunch and he was just generally lovely.

I do try to be nice most of the time but it's mainly during the week when we are both at work that I get frustrated because I'm tired and things need doing.

So lip buttoned and massage oil out for the week !

I agree- nice thread. DP made such a big effort yesterday that I realised how devoted he is to us and what a kind person he is.
I realised that in my mind I find fault in most things he does- usually unjustified.
It has become a habit that I am determined to stop!!

me too, we had a terrible friday night because everyone was realy mean and snipey all evevning culminating in my dh crashing the roof box into the theatre car park (first ever family theatre trip, may be the last) and everyone (me too) was just mean to him about how stupid he was. later on he actualy cried and said how fed up he was and no one respected or valued him. i felt rotten it was only a bit of over the top teasing but he was vulnerable and it was too much. and it was only a thing fgs. so i am going to stop

I signed up to do this last week - and really struggled tbh! but new week more effort... I love the idea, but find it a struggle, must try harder!

Bobsyouruncle: is there a specific challenge you can set yourself this week that you would be likely to manage?

Ormirian - can we help with your midlife crisis??

Me - I pick stupid fights because I'm angry about other stuff & poor darling Hubby is always there to take it. I will be much nicer to him.

It's true, Minster, we take out lots of frustrations on them that have nothing to do with them. It's like we feel they're a 'safe target'.

Donk signing in for this challenge!

Hello Donk!

janni - no i don't think so. But thanks. It's down to me to stop thinking the grass is greener. I just seemed to have spent so many years grafting and struggling and I am getting scared at the idea that now I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel, I'm starting to get lines and aching joints and generally get OLD!

You could give me a virtual slap round the head and tell me to get a grip. Might help ]