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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Husband hasn’t come home!

698 replies

Worried00 · 07/09/2023 05:20

My husband went to play darts last night as he does every Wednesday. I’ve woken up at 4.30am and he isn’t home!!!
I’ve tried calling him and WhatsApping him- no answer and no reply. He hasn’t read my messages.
his darts team are his old work mates who I have no contact information for.
im worried sick. What do I do!? Do I call the police? Do I call hospitals !? Help, I feel sick

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Rockandchips · 07/09/2023 06:32

I would be worried too if its not somthing he usually does.

flibbertigiblets · 07/09/2023 06:32

I understand the concern. Been there. It’s gut wrenching.

I would also call non emergency line as soon as you can. Nothing to lose. Then call old workplace or figure out ex colleagues email addresses?

Logic says if anything awful had happened the police would have hammered the door by now. They don’t wait for sociable hours.

Hopefully he just decided to drink and stay with a mate and didn’t think to let you know/passed out.

I hope everything is ok OP.

AnImaginaryCat · 07/09/2023 06:32

100% of husband/partner has not come home threads end up with them turning up. Either they got very drunk or decided to go elsewhere and just not message the partner or their phone was out of power.

This of course doesn't mean you won't worry. That is only natural. However if it were an accident chances are you'd have been contacted.

belle1993 · 07/09/2023 06:34

Any update op? I would call the police if you know he's not been drinking

Tiredchicken · 07/09/2023 06:35

i hope he turns up safe and well soon.

AnImaginaryCat · 07/09/2023 06:35

Redglitter · 07/09/2023 06:29

It wouldn't do any harm to phone hospitals. That's something 101 will ask if you've done.

If you've no joy there I'd call 101. If he'd been out drinking etc that's different but when he's just been at the pub and driving and this is so out of character I'd call 101

Very sorry to hear that. But I presume, while not straightaway, you were contacted?

VisionsOfSplendour · 07/09/2023 06:37

AnImaginaryCat · 07/09/2023 06:32

100% of husband/partner has not come home threads end up with them turning up. Either they got very drunk or decided to go elsewhere and just not message the partner or their phone was out of power.

This of course doesn't mean you won't worry. That is only natural. However if it were an accident chances are you'd have been contacted.

Sadly they don't, I remember one that didn't have a good outcome at all although it wasn't quite the same as iirc the OP did have reason to be worried

Out of character behaviour is always going to be worrying

Cowlover89 · 07/09/2023 06:38

I hope he turns up soon. Ignore the unhelpful comments. I would be very worried too x

Redglitter · 07/09/2023 06:38

AnImaginaryCat · 07/09/2023 06:35

Very sorry to hear that. But I presume, while not straightaway, you were contacted?

Show quote history

Eh??

Autieangel · 07/09/2023 06:39

I would be worried too. Can you contact friends via social media like messenger? I'd probably get kids to school. Ring his work and if he's not there ring police. Flowers

Comeoncarol · 07/09/2023 06:42

I hope your DH turns up safe OP.

Ýsette · 07/09/2023 06:42

What time is he due at work? Could he have gone straight there? Would he be worried about not going in? If so, he may have gone straight there maybe?

addicteetopawpatrol · 07/09/2023 06:42

Good luck

ErniesGhostlyGoldTops · 07/09/2023 06:47

Is he in the car asleep on the drive?

ApolloandDaphne · 07/09/2023 06:47

How worrying. I would call 101 given he was driving and not drinking. If they can't help I would drive past the pub later once you are all up and see if the car is in the car park.

TookTheBook · 07/09/2023 06:48

Is he on the sofa or in the spare room

Blueberrycreampie · 07/09/2023 06:50

Hope you hear something soon op!

CozyCamper · 07/09/2023 06:52

I would try the people he was out with, if no sign after the kids are at school maybe ring the local hospital and then wait until the pub opens and try them.

If you have a share computer try find my iphone/Samsung. I always save my password, if it isn't saved do you know his email and password?

If he'd crashed the police would have been at your door, unless you live somewhere completely remote where it would have gone unnoticed.

It's up to you when you call the police, my husband has never not come home and I would 100% believe something was wrong so would phone straight away. ExH I would have waited days prob because he had form for it, part of the reason he's my ex husband.

Magicmonster · 07/09/2023 06:52

This happened to me once. I was worried sick. Turns out he has been arrested for an altercation with a taxi driver. They let him go the following day but not before I had called round the police, local hospitals etc. I still haven’t forgiven him!

Ladybug14 · 07/09/2023 06:52

I'm worried for you. When you can, please let us know that he's ok 🥰

TeaGinandFags · 07/09/2023 06:53

Hope hubby turns up safe so you can give him a good earbashing. If nothing else get the kids into school.

Call his work, the police and where you think he was playing darts. Tell the police that your car is missing as it will be out on the street somewhere. That's all you can do.

Then get yourself into work and tell your manager in case you have to leave precipitously or deal with phone calls.

Take care x

Coffeetree · 07/09/2023 06:53

Yes sorry if it sounds stupid but do check the sofa! I once gave my husband a fright when I got in late and crept into the spare room. He sent me ten texts before he realised.

AnImaginaryCat · 07/09/2023 06:54

Redglitter · 07/09/2023 06:38

Eh??

Show quote history

Sorry quoted wrong post. Meant to be the post about the husband having a life changing accident and it not being priority contacting her.

Chippy4me · 07/09/2023 06:54

Chances are he’s got too drunk and sensibly stayed at a mates house.

If you have been ringing his mobile and he has been in an accident, I would have thought someone at the hospital/police would have picked up.

I would try ringing again and if this is highly unusual for him then ring the police.

Gcsunnyside23 · 07/09/2023 06:54

If he's still not home and you haven't already then give 101 a call fir peace of mind

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