Desperate yet picky single people

[Floogal]

One of my biggest pet hates is people who complain about being single but at the same time are really picky (and unrealistic by overestimating their own attractiveness). Often see it here on threads about online dating. If anything, I think it's more annoying when women do it, because there is a surplus of men generally (uneven sex ratio) so there's a bigger pool to choose from. So there's less reason to be lonely than for a man. But I shall use the example of 2 people I know to illustrate.

1. Male, in his late 30s. Actually a pleasant enough person. But often likes going clubbing (even in his own if none of his friends are out) and puts status updates on Facebook complaining about how women there reject him and break his heart. Sometimes he puts profile pictures up of him standing next to pretty girls he's only just met on nights out. Also constantly puts up cutesy posts with his niece and dog, which is a bit cringe as he does it so often. He is aware that he's below average attractiveness. I tried fixing him up with a friend of mine who is also single and she was keen on meeting him. But he told me he wasn't interested. It seems he only goes for women who look like love island Contestants. So I lost sympathy for him. 2.Female in her early 50s. Pretty face and nice hair. But also she's quite overweight and has really bad breath (due to Gird so it's not really her fault). As well as being skint. Complains about being single and and that it's Madonna's fault she can't find a boyfriend because she encouraged them to be gay (she actually said that). When guys do show interest in her she complains about how boring they are or how they don't have a car or much money (with no sense of irony). She gushes over the guys who look like Paul Hollywood and wonders why they're already in relationships with a woman who's not her.

I couldn't agree more @ChristmasFluff , I was edged out of ''leaning in'' when I had young kids. Anyway, I'm not moaning about that now, but any man who talks about cake and eating it is not capable of a decent analysis of what happens when women have children.

So, to de mystify it for confused men, here's a flow chart

If you go on a date with a woman and you don't like her and aren't invested in to her thinking well of you, then absolutely, say it, ''let's go Dutch''.

It will either confirm her doubts or about YOU or, if she had liked you then you not paying for the date will be something for her to focus on.

If you go on a date with a woman and could imagine staying in touch in a friendly way, go on then, you've nothing to lose, say it ''let's go dutch'' she'll either be feeling the same way and be relieved, or if she had liked you, then again, going Dutch spells out a lack of romance, so that's that message out there.

If you go on a date with a woman that you want to see again because you like her, then this is the first point at which there is a decision for you to make.

Are you too mean to pay for this meal without grudging it to her? Nobody's making you pay. It's really up to you. Either pay for it or don't.

I think SHE is better of knowing sooner rather than later whether this is a generosity that you begrudge. There'd be nothing worse than thinking you'd met an easy going man who liked women and valued you in particular only to then find out he was seething at the injustice of women ''having their cake and eating it''. So, don't pay if you don't want to. Is it really the case that you're going on so many dates that you're paying for??

I ALWAYS INSISTED on paying half if i had no intention of seeing the man again.

So none of it is a complicated as men make out.