@sammylady37 The op is clearly bemoaning loose womenwho have sex too easily/early as this means men don’t have to make an effort/up their game/become exclusive etc. The op feels this is why she is not having success on online dating. Clearly insinuating that withholding sex (or not being a loose woman) will force men to change their behaviour. Seems pretty transactional to me.
You may wish to see it like that but I don't.
Perhaps the most concerning aspect of 'hook-up culture' (which is no being promoted by so-called 'feminists') is how it blurs the line between casual sex and assault,, especially when “everyone expects everyone to be having casual sex.” This may lead to the assumption that all women are willing and ready to engage in this culture, despite many having reservations. Also those that don't are regarded as 'prudish/judgemental/ or the old cliche - "using sex as 'transactional'."
Thus, many of these women are prone to unwanted attention, which often leads to assault.
Unfortunately, because men are encouraged to compete with each other regarding sex and hookups, the use of coercion and manipulation, including "date-rape" drugs, continues to be all too common.
Proponents of 'hook-up' culture argue that women participating in strictly physical relationships with men are taking ownership of their bodies and defying the patriarchy, which, in many cases, can be true. Yet, in sexual encounters, men still have much of the power. Hooking up is often cultivated within male-dominated spaces.
Every nightclub or singles event I have attended, offered free or reduced entry fees for woman. That ensured that the ratio of male/female is usually 3:1 in the men's favour.
Such ratios ensure that the men have the power, because they have options of who they may sleep with that night. Women, however, are left at the mercy of these men and the misogynistic society they continue to endure.
Male sexual pleasure is often prioritized in male-female sexual relationships due to how the genders are socialized around sexuality in our society and the availability and use of pornography. In pornography women are seen as having multiple orgasms at the drop of a hat with very little effort on the part of the male, and as enjoying rough and even violent activities.
This has led to an orgasm gap that exists between males and females, and this gap is even larger in casual sex relationships.