I paid for sex in the past when should I reveal this to my GF?

[Changedman]

I am 24 years old atm when I was 17/18 years old I paid for sex once(this is how I lost my virginity) I was with an older woman and she proposed me and said I could sleep with her if I gave her some money and out of stupidity I obliged. When I was 18 I paid for sex once after doing some research about the industry I felt disgusted and decided I would never pay for sex again and didn't and again. I know for a fact that the women that I paid aren't being forced or coerced and both did what they did independently and of their own free will but I do understand that It will be a deal breaker for a lot of women and I don't want to be leading people on so can I have some advice on how to conduct myself?

It's deep in the past and you regret it and won't be repeating it. So only tell her if you're prepared to lose her over it - personally I'd rather not know as it would be pointless to, and yet it would change how I see you.

As regards your virginity "story" I've never discussed how I lost mine, and don't want to know how DH lost his. It's not a compulsory discussion!

Say nothing.deal with guilt or whatever feelings you gave yourself.telling her won’t make you feel less guilty you are just adding her feelings into the mix..deal with it and move on,enjoy the relationship you have and stop living in past.

Well, Bob Ross painted and he was a painter. So by analogy, I guess so. 🥳

You should not beat yourself up about having done it. You were single. There is nothing wrong with paying for sex. Only you know how she will take it but I don't see why you need to tell her. There is no obligation when you are in a relationship to talk about previous relationships.

You don't need to reveal anything it's in your past

Sex without consent is rape.
Consent that has to be bought or coerced in any way is not valid, and is not consent.
Do the maths.

I can tell you for free it isn't going to give you any confidence mate luckily ive had sexual relationships outside of those two and they are two different things you are better off not doing it at all there is no sudden change in a person when they lose their virginity. Try and shoot your shot with a couple different women a week your definitely going to get rejected a couple times but you are also going to succeed

I understand your point that must mean any type of transactional sex is rape including all pornography all sugar relationships and etc. We can agree to disagree though

THIS with bells on.

As for the “kissless virgin”, your absolute hatred and disrespect for women is shining through in your writing. That is likely why you “find it difficult” to get a woman to sleep with you.

I cannot believe how many people think purchasing consent is okay. Consent cannot be bought. The woman/man would not be consenting if there wasn’t a transactional value.

Buying access to a man or woman’s body is just (I hate this word) ick. It shows no compassion, no humanity and reduces the person to a product. Humans aren’t products. Until (mainly) men stop purchasing consent, human trafficking will be prevalent. For every escort who isn’t trafficked, there are 11 who are. I could not associate with anybody who felt that much disregard for another human being.

I can hand on heart say that I’d rather be with a man who has slept with 1000 women who he never had to purchase consent from than a man who’d slept white one who he did have to buy.

Get on fabswingers or something.

I was going to say you must tell her, but the fact that you only did it once and you were young I don’t think you should tell her at all.
I think If it were something you did several times it would be different but we all make mistakes and you learnt quickly that it was a mistake so that’s what matters.

👏 👏

OP I don’t think you should tell your gf. I do agree with this post, you can’t buy consent.

This might shock you, sit down, but some women want sex outside of relationships.

You don’t need to coerce, pay or trick anyone for sex.

In fact, most women I know currently who are single are seeking hookups over relationships.

And stop with that rubbish about the odds not being in your favour because men outnumber women.

but I am on fabswingers and literally every other app, I still cant get a hookup lol.

Perhaps because you are misogynist piece of crap who thinks its ok to purchase a womans body to spunk into. If even women who are up for one night stands won't sleep with you, its not because you are a 20 something virgin! Its likely because of your view of women!

You cannot purchase consent. if she wouldn't sleep with you unless you pay her - IT'S NOT CONSENT!
Its a massive imbalance of power and any man who purchases a womans body to use for his own sexual gratification is an absolute piece of shit and certainly not anyone I would describe as a man.

Men don't rape women and cover it with - 'well I paaaaaaaid her, so its fine'. Jesus.

Work on being a decent human being and you'll find women might actually like you. Crazy idea I know.

Well someone has just made OP seem very desirable by comparison! @User593939108 if you don't know it, look up the word "incel". This is why you can't get girls - not because it's just so much easier for us than the poor, sex deprived men, but because this is how you, specifically, come across, and there is nothing less attractive.

As for relationships im only interested in virgins right now as im one myself, once I lose my virginity then I wouldnt care if she isnt a virgin

This makes no fucking sense. And its deeply deeply disturbing.
you realise that protitutes are highly unlikley to be virgins right? Unless they are very young, have been trafficked and forced into it.

And once you've lost your virginity you won't care if shes a virgin or not?

So you are specifically seeking a woman who is a virgin!
And FYI there are zero women out there who would even come near you, let alone touch you if you've paid a virgin - likely still a child or teenager - to simply lose your virginity.

I actually want to vomit thinking people like you exist.

And yes OP, compared to this 'guy', you're fine.

Dear Lord get some self awareness, you sound ridiculous.

There are more women than men in the world, most women are NOT bisexuals, the percentage is tiny, as is the percentage of immigrants.

You can't get women because your opinions are absolutely awful and the vast majority of us would run a mile.

What a loss you are to those harlots out there "sleeping around and having their sexual fun".

Believe me, they will NOT be looking for a man like you when they decide they want to settle down.