Dating while pregnant

[Bunny44]

I don't know if people will find this topic a bit weird but basically I'm 18 weeks pregnant after my ex left me at 9 weeks pregnant for someone else. I'm conscious I'll not be able to date, or probably have sex for a really long time and that makes me sad.

I still have needs and would like the opportunity to experience some intimacy before an anticipated very long dry-spell. I'm not sure how to go about it. I don't even know if I want to mention I'm pregnant. I'm not looking for anything serious especially since I'm going to relocate when 8 months pregnant. I used to use Hinge for dating but I think that tends to be more serious, whereas Tinder seems to be full of weird people.

I live in Central London and usually it's really easy to meet people with apps, but it's just the approach I'm unsure of. Also has anyone else dated while pregnant and how was it?

Yass!! This

Jeez, the judging and catastrophising on this thread!

"You will get herpes and your baby will go blind!!!"
"Only men with a pregnancy fetish will be interested"
"It will damage your mental health because pregnancy makes you deranged! Hormones innit!!"

I had a heightened sex drive when I was pregnant, until I was enormous. There are plenty of tales of people meeting when the woman was pregnant. You can also have some fun! You sound like you are looking for some validation - I validate you. Try it. See how it goes. You hook up with a guy, it's fun - great! You hook up and it isn't fun - have a think about it!

I honestly wouldn’t.

I can remember having an intense safeguarding conversation with my doctor when my little one had a reoccurring UTI and they were asking me so many questions about my partner and if they were the child’s father etc. I just wouldn’t want to risk raising anyones eyebrows by bringing a non biological male into the picture whilst pregnant.

So much infantilising of a pregnant woman as well.

"You can't possibly know what's best for you!"

This
Your body
Your life

I agree. I thought the OP was 18 or 19.

If you're presenting as a bit lonely and trying to fill the void with causal sex then you need to hear it. It's not infantilising.

She's already had causal sex 😆

I just think it's really grim sorry

try Feel’d if you are in london. Lots of no strings attached sex on there. I’ve never used it personally but I know women that do and are really happy with the people they’ve met.
I’ve also been single and pregnant and I have to say it wasn’t something I was looking for but absolutely no judgement here! If I had been, I probablY wouldn’t have said I was pregnant on reflection as i think that as a kink would make me feel a bit gross. But each to their own.

If you want to date then date! As you are moving away you don't even need to tell them. Keep it casual, say you're moving for another job soon. Leave it at that.

One, split condom and your baby has an STI.

Just one.

I sincerely hope this is a troll.

That was my first thought too . . .

I am 8 months now and humongous. I wouldn’t fancy it myself but if you do, be safe with condoms and like others have said, maybe check whether everything is ok and you don’t have a low-lying placenta before.
I still have sex with my partner but don’t super fancy it right now so your window to do this and enjoy the sex might be small but everyone is different.

Why? Women don’t just cease to exist or have needs and turn into incubating vessels when pregnant.

If this was a man wanting to date while his ex was pregnant everyone on here would judge.

No decent man or woman would go out looking for casual shags while expecting someone else’s child.

And no decent woman would get involved with a man whose ex was pregnant, and no decent man would want to casually shag a woman who was pregnant with someone else’s child.

The whole thing is vile.

No advice but I don’t think it’s grim at all. Good for you for not having the level of internalised shame that many of these judgemental posters must have.

Why not treat yourself to some pregnancy massages, maybe a new sex toy, and arrange some meet ups with friends? These are still positive things to do for yourself regardless of whether the dating works out or not. Is it your first pregnancy? I can’t see the harm in dating if you stay safe and self aware, but I was very hormonal and grumpy by the third trimester….a casual date would have run a mile 😂

Try having a little compassion for someone who's obviously feeling lonely and down instead of kicking the boot in. The odds are not that she's not some desperate nymph, more likely its human connection and intimacy she wants. I agree it's not the best way to get those things, but try easing up on the nastiness, eh?

Casual sex isn’t going to make you feel any less lonely.

and if you want companionship and someone to cuddle at night - that isn’t casual sex.

Yes my radar is pinging a bit with this. It’s more the casualness of being dumped only 9 weeks ago by their baby’s father and OP’s only interest is getting a shag or two.

"It's not a few months as I'm moving in with my parents and will have a young baby - from now it'll likely be over a year. I won't have time to date or really have my own space for a long time. My priority will be my baby. But right now I do have time and space."

Personally, I would use this "time" and "space" to focus on doing everything you can to financially and independently house yourself and your unborn child, independently of your parents.

Not sure what independent financial provision you have already put in place for yourself and your unborn child but, i would suggest you use your free time to focus on that and your child, rather than piss about dating.

FEELD is the app for you
say what you said here and screen VERY wisely x
easily achievable

Sorry but this is rank