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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Married to someone with Asperger's/ASD: support thread 8

984 replies

Daftasabroom · 12/04/2023 11:55

New thread.

This thread is for partners seeking to understand the dynamics of mixed NT/ND partnerships. It is a support thread, and a safe space to have a bit of a rant. Avoid sweeping generalisations if possible, try and keep it specific to you and your partner. (ASD partners welcome to lurk or pop in, but please don't argue with other posters and tell them they are wrong)

Link to previous thread

Page 40 | Married to someone with Asperger's/ASC: support thread 7 | Mumsnet

Mumsnet makes parents' lives easier by pooling knowledge, advice and support on everything from conception to childbirth, from babies to teenagers.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/4681774-married-to-someone-with-aspergersasc-support-thread-7?page=40&reply=125367664

OP posts:
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10
classicslove · 17/04/2023 19:13

Thank you so much for your messages, sorry I don't know how to reply to individual posters.
I'm hoping to speak to a friend tomorrow which will hopefully help but no family I can or would feel comfortable talking to unfortunately. Mum has dementia and my daughter is heavily pregnant, due date today, so don't want to put any of this on her at the moment.
The doctor said I am on the 2 week fast track so should hear from the hospital this week.
I think the best course of action is not to say anything to DH at the moment but wait until I have had the hospital appointment. I am feeling vunerable enough at the moment and a negative reaction would only make things worse for me.
Thank you for your support, I will keep posting if thats Ok just feeling a bit lost at the moment.

Fidelius · 17/04/2023 19:26

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BlueTick · 17/04/2023 19:52

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ReleaseTheDucksOfWar · 17/04/2023 20:13

@classicslove I'm very sorry to hear about this health scare.

If your husband is anything like my ex, I would have informed him factually that there was a cancer scare but leave it at that one sentence. That way he knew, but with keeping it factual there was nothing else asked of him.

I am not sure he actually needs to know at this point since it's not going to work if you ask for any support. If the worst happens, he does need to know but keeping it factual and brief will not ask too much of him.

I hope you can speak to your friend tomorrow and gain some emotional support there.

I hope very much that your daughter's labour goes well and that soon your have a grandchild to cuddle and bring warmth Flowers

Eas1lyd1stracted · 18/04/2023 20:33

@classicslove exciting news about the baby. Something nice to focus I hope. Any news yet? Did you decide whether to talk to your OH?

classicslove · 18/04/2023 21:57

@Eas1lyd1stracted Thanks for asking. No news yet but saw her today and shes fine but can't wait now.
Decided not to say anything yet, mainly because I can only cope with my own emotions at the moment. It's so difficult when you know you need support but are also aware that it wont be there in the way you need. Hope that makes sense!

classicslove · 18/04/2023 22:02

I think what I meant by that was, I just need a hug, but one where you can feel an emotional conection not just because that's what you do (almost like a learnt reaction to a particular situation)

SpecialMangeTout · 19/04/2023 08:01

Yep. Makes total sense.
And one of the things I miss most. Even a hug doesn’t feel right

bunhead1979 · 19/04/2023 11:10

Agree that makes sense to me as well. I know virtual hugs are rubbish but I'll send you one anyway. Hope you are doing ok today @classicslove

OhTheSilence · 19/04/2023 11:34

DP doesn't think much of hugs either. Though he likes to be stroked a lot, like on his arm, and massaged. I think it calms him down. Does anyone find that too?

Eas1lyd1stracted · 19/04/2023 21:04

Another crap virtual hug for you @classicslove. Yeah distance and lack of physical affection are tough for me. Lucky it's only occasionally here, whilst my wife is upstairs at the moment a lot its a sleeping with exhaustion and temporary. Hope your friend was able to offer support and a hug

BlueTick · 19/04/2023 21:59

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IndigoFlamingo · 19/04/2023 22:20

Dear dear @BlueTick I feel and hear your every word. I know we often say things like that, but sentence after sentence of what you wrote, I thought "yes that's me", "yes, that's me", "yes, that's me". I don't really need to repeat it all here, but I'm going to anyway: yes not spontaneous any more, yes wanting to be alone and yet so not wanting to be, yes wanting to be with friends but just being used up and not being able to get out there, yes to "argh" thoughts about retirement, yes to two-dimensional, yes to feeling lost. I'm here with you, if that's any help? I know it's not really, but thank you for writing so much more clearly than I could do exactly how I feel.💐Don't let go of who you are just because you can't face upheaval or even the thought of it. Stay strong and true to yourself in your thoughts at least. That's a minimum to hold on to.

ReleaseTheDucksOfWar · 19/04/2023 23:01

I can't imagine retiring with this man at all. Does anyone else feel like me? That they want to leave but the upheaval is just too much. Selling the house, splitting the family, restarting a job of some sort....

Yes, very much so. Went to a very dark and dreary place, because I couldn't face the upheaval.

If you -can- find the energy though, and my god it's hard especially with health issues, it's worth it. It really is. I hope you can.

BlueTick · 19/04/2023 23:23

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BlueTick · 19/04/2023 23:33

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SquirrelSoShiny · 20/04/2023 00:46

Blue Tick - another one who could have written your every word.

To any new joiners, read all these threads and see how our experiences are so devastatingly similar.

bunhead1979 · 20/04/2023 08:58

I am identifying so much with what everyone is saying. I hit rock bottom a few years ago, a few things came to a head and I had a breakdown. Now I have totally separated off. I look after myself and the kids and put our priorities first, I do my hobbies and see my friends when I want. My thinking is that if he is not happy about it he is perfectly free to sit me down and have a chat about it, but even writing those words I know he would never do that. I actually feel like I can do anything now like superwoman as I am essentially (aside from some financial contribution) doing everything myself, if he walked tomorrow I feel ready and prepared, I'm not scared of being alone any more.

@BlueTick I hear you. For me, I felt I could fix him, I was young and stupid and insecure. I have had to realise I can't be thinking about "potential" I have to deal with what is right in front of me.

BlueTick · 20/04/2023 09:25

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bunhead1979 · 20/04/2023 09:37

@BlueTick that sounds miserable. That actually sounds a lot like my dad (un diagnosed but definitely autistic) constant judgement over tiny things that are a) inconseqential really and b) none of his business.

My partner is also ADHD and very bad with money so years ago after he got in problems with tax bills I took over our money, another thing that is my responsibility! thought this does afford me some freedom. We put our wages in to a joint account and each take out an allowance to spend as we want. I save mine for little holidays and my gym etc. I am going away soon for three days now, the teens are already making noises about how they don't want me to go but I really need it and they are old enough now they can look after themselves as long as he is around.

ReleaseTheDucksOfWar · 20/04/2023 11:25

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Yes, we are. There was a final straw and I heard the words coming out of my mouth "it's over" without all that much input from me, iykwim.

The relationship had died a long time before, I just didn't want to separate because 1) trapped financially then 2) children - I so badly wanted them to have stability, but happier parents would have been better 3) exactly what you said. I had nothing left and no energy at all - some health issues were badlly exacerbated by living so very unhappily.

He was good practically and appalling emotionally during the divorce, to the point his best friend got in contact to ask if I was alright!

The rather grim news is that it took months before I even began to see that light still existed, iyswim, and now 3 1/2 years on I'm still recovering and will be for quite a long time to come. I had pre-existing vulnerabilities but was coping quite well before the marriage, unfortunately the nature of the relationship has made them far worse. I think for most people it would take a shorter time.

All I can say though is that the whole idea of uprooting the relationship, of changing the status quo and rebuilding was beyond my conscious power for a long time, but once it happened it was so so so worth it.

He's not a bad man, actually. But he was a very bad husband. He does and always has loved the kids and is involved, which can also be a mixed blessing, but we do work quite well together in co-partnership, even if he's been known to hit them :s

BlueTick · 20/04/2023 23:13

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ReleaseTheDucksOfWar · 20/04/2023 23:39

How did you restart your career?

I'm afraid the very bad news is that I haven't been able to. The combination of worsened health issues & both children being ND mean it's impossible now, and I have tried. I'm in the NL - the work is available but it just isn't possible.

Having said that I -can- survive financially for now (though the future is uncertain) and given the children both need more support than many, Im glad I can be there for them. The health issues suck, but I consider myself fortunate in many ways tbh.

classicslove · 21/04/2023 07:52

Hi just a quick update. My daughter has a baby boy in the eary hours of this morning and they are both doing well. Hoping to see them later all being well.

IndigoFlamingo · 21/04/2023 08:41

Congratulations to your daughter. Welcome to the world, Little One! Hope you get to see them soon @classicslove . 😊