How long before you sleep together?

[ThisIsaNiceDress]

What’s the accepted timeline nowadays when you are actually serious about someone? 😂

We had been taking for a few weeks over WhatsApp and FaceTiming until 5am haha! We both said we wouldn’t sleep together on the first date as we wanted to take things slow as we had both come out of abusive relationships. I drive to his house as he had cooked dinner and it was just instant. We sniffed on the sofa for a bit and then he slung me over his shoulder and took me upstairs! Never spent a day apart since!

Was he Craig David?

As soon as I want to & since I’ve no interest in a relationship with a man I don’t want to fuck (or who turns out to be sexually incompatible) that’s always been pretty soon after meeting. With dh (of 25 years) it was within a few hours.

My worst experiences were with attractive, charming, funny, seemingly great men … one turned out to have a fetish & the other incredibly low libido. I’m grateful I didn’t invest time/get attached to either before the incompatibilities became apparent!

@heatdeath Pleeeaase tell us what his fetish wash?

I met my partner online, only went on there for a laugh, a bit of banter after a break up. We got talking on the Monday, 3hour phone call the next day, non stop messaging all week, met on the Friday, slept together, he came back Saturday, slept together, officially got together the month after, engaged after 4 months, been together 3yrs now, have a 1yr old and getting married next year

If you’re looking for something lasting, about a month.

If it’s a fanny flutter on a night out less than half an hour.
😁😁

Vast majority of relationships / dates go nowhere...don't demonise sex, not every date has to lead to marriage

but it seems like good sex helps having a good marriage!

We had known each other for years, so that was actually really strange.

The first time he and I were nude, it was almost hysterically funny because he was my friend first, and it was all a bit surreal.

First date though, for the actual sex. I wouldn't buy a car without test driving it first!

Slept with my partner on the first night we physically met. We met online. I took a risk and went over to his place, he made the first move and it was the best risk I've ever taken as we now have 2 daughters together and have been together 3 years this month.

Dh was a one night stand. Went out looking for a shag, bagged him on the dance floor, took him back to mine and fucked all night. He moved in the next day, good job as I ended up being pregnant and we've been together 15 years now 😬

I think the second date, I’d known him about three weeks, I think. It was great. Married with a child and two dogs now!

Anyone I’ve ever been serious about I’ve slept with immediately and we’ve basically just gone from there

I've slept with men the first time going out with them as I've never believed in that love at first sight crap but what attracted me to a man was the sexual ooh la la lol. That was of course the days before I met my hub so it's just window shopping with the ooh la la look but don't touch lol.

About six weeks of weekly dates. Been together 11 years.

Obviously people can believe what they want. I think the whole idea of "the one" is romanticised bollocks.

I thought my ex husband was "the one", and that he and I were made for one another. Fuck, was I ever mistaken.

I learned from this.

Same here. I also need to know the other person well enough to laugh when it all goes wrong and nobody orgasms at all. A good relationship that's worth pursuing is far more than having an orgasm.

About 3 hours.
Been happily married for 12 years.

Absolutely. However we did speak every day for 6 weeks (he was in his home country for the summer) and built up a bit of connection there, so I think that helped - as well as him being extremely attractive.

I haven’t had sex In 6 years so not a chance am I sleeping with someone on the first night it will be a very long while!! For everyone that says they slept with a guy the first night and they are now married etc there will be a 100 others who never heard from the guy again if your fine with that go for it

How can you be serious about someone you’ve just met? 🤔

I agree. How tf can you know that you are serious with someone you don't know, and who presumably just wants a shag?

As another poster said, keep in mind that although this site is called Mumsnet, it’s often males posting
Nearly fifty percent of posters are males

Chemistry? How you feel? Anyone I’ve ever been serious about I’ve pretty much known straight away that there was something I was interested in pursuing and I’ve been right.

And obviously I’m also aware from knowledge of my own life that those encounters developed into LTRs…… 😄

So confused by that comment glad it’s not just me! Can’t imagine feeling “serious” about someone I’ve just met that day if a guy was saying it MN would say it was a red flag 🚩

About 3 weeks in, we’d been on a few dates beforehand and I did some other stuff before the sex… I guess it’s when you’re ready. No deadline.