Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

To never speak to him again after this?

413 replies

shestakingtheurine · 17/03/2023 20:41

I've been dating a man for a few months now , we don't live together yet. My car broke down the other night on a busy dual carriageway in the rain at rush hour on my way home from work and it was a 2 hour wait for the AA man to come and rescue me. I messaged him and told him what had happened and he messaged be back saying 'that's sad' I later expressed that I felt I that he should have at least offered to come to me or offer me a lift home as the car went to the garage and I had to make my own way home. I said I was a bit upset that he hadn't even asked if I had got home ok. He responded that 'you want to click your fingers and I'm just going to drop everything and come' and 'I do actually have a life' and he said ' you think my world revolves around you and it doesn't' and 'why would I ask if you got home ok when you weren't even that far from home' and I have more important things to think about than a broken down car. I was shocked and upset as he had never behaved this way before but I haven't spoken to him since and I don't think I want to speak to him again. Was I in the wrong expecting him to show concern or help? He lives maybe a 20 minute drive from where I was.

OP posts:
Doesthepopeshitinthewoods · 24/03/2023 11:22

shestakingtheurine · 24/03/2023 06:43

He's also said some suspicious things thinking back such as that 'women have never had it better I don't know why they complain think about how women lived 100 years ago'.

Christ. What an absolute peach he is.

You have sidestepped one fuck of a landmine.

Doesthepopeshitinthewoods · 24/03/2023 11:25

Catoo · 24/03/2023 10:31

I think you’re wasting too much time thinking about him now. Get him blocked and move on. You don’t need anymore evidence that he’s an arsehole.
Good luck OP x

No she’s not, she’s just sharing the mad shit that he’s said and done since.

canfor · 25/03/2023 09:50

The more you tell us, the more I think what a lucky escape you had, he's not much of a catch is he?!

LooseGoose22 · 25/03/2023 14:46

shestakingtheurine · 24/03/2023 06:36

I think he feels that he needs to 'bring me down a peg or two '. I am fairly successful for my age, I have my own fiat, a masters degree and sometimes I got the impression that he felt like I was getting above my station. For example I can't remember how the conversation came about but I asked him what attracted him to me and he said 'I'm not telling you because I don't want you to get a big head and inflate your ego'. I know that some abusive men specifically go after confident and successful women because they like the challenge of breaking them down? I feel like this is what might have been happening to me.

Sounds to me like he knows hes barely in your league and doesn't want to contribute you to realising it.

Also that he subscribes to the treat em mean, keep em keen philosophy.

LooseGoose22 · 25/03/2023 14:47

shestakingtheurine · 24/03/2023 06:43

He's also said some suspicious things thinking back such as that 'women have never had it better I don't know why they complain think about how women lived 100 years ago'.

Sounds like he's also a bit Incel, mgtow, red pill, misogynist.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 25/03/2023 15:29

Sounds like an absolute twat.

ReneBumsWombats · 25/03/2023 18:19

LooseGoose22 · 25/03/2023 14:47

Sounds like he's also a bit Incel, mgtow, red pill, misogynist.

He's probably on here these days.

LooseGoose22 · 25/03/2023 19:54

ReneBumsWombats · 25/03/2023 18:19

He's probably on here these days.

It is a bit whack the mole (is it a mole?) on here these days.

Pigglesworth · 25/03/2023 20:42

OP he is not good enough for you and not worth investing your further time in, this is not the way a loving partner/boyfriend/person should/would ever behave - across all the examples of behaviour you provided. Please keep ignoring him/have nothing further to do with him. A loving/caring partner/boyfriend, even in the early days, would express genuine care about the car breakdown and not make it about himself, even if he were unable to come to you; would have no issue with telling you what he finds attractive about you; and would not be playing silly games now "punishing" you/trying to "put you in your place" when he was the one in the wrong. I don't believe his dad went urgently to hospital, but even if he did, this man made your car breakdown all about himself and berating you. You want someone much better "in your corner" in life.

Bimc44 · 28/03/2023 14:42

Wow..bin him off. What an inconsiderate horrible person.
Im going through a terrible time at the moment with some stuff..the guy I was dating acted in exactly the same way..disappointing aren’t they. Hope you’re ok

qqq82 · 20/04/2023 21:06

Did you hear anymore @shestakingtheurine or did you block the prick ?

Bubblemachiene · 20/04/2023 21:43

Eurgh , reminds me of something my soon to be ex says all the time, if I ever were to ask hin to help me do something he'd say- in a bit I'm not jumping up just because you click your fingers 🚩 see it as a lucky escape

Coulditreallybe · 21/04/2023 00:48

hows it going @shestakingtheurine

New posts on this thread. Refresh page