@Thisisworsethananticpated it’s a minefield. You need to do what’s right for you, without really knowing what that is, because it changes. I soldiered on after Pug, and it was such a slog. Nothing awful, just nice evenings in nice pubs wearing the same jeans-and-a-nice-top with what felt like interchangeable nice guys. I called it Groundhog Date! (I think it was only about six, but I ran them altogether in a week, because my DD was on a school trip so I took advantage of the opportunity). And they were nice, normal guys. I was clearly doing good job of weeding out eeejits. It was about as good as it gets, really! But my god it was a slog (I’m quite introverted and being a lone parent has massively limited my social life. I’m not used having one!) Like going to lots of different supermarkets when you don’t know what you want to eat, but the options are all the same in slightly different packaging, and really you fancy street food. I almost didn’t go out with MrPottery, because I thought if I didn’t want any of these nice guys, with big houses, nice cars and good jobs, then maybe I didn’t want a man at all (or maybe they just….weren’t Pug, and maybe I was in that awful place where you don’t want to be alone, but you don’t want anyone else either)
When I went out with MrPottery, it was like wandering around a Moroccan street market trying to decide what I wanted to eat. It felt exotic and exciting and different right away. Everything was surprising and delightful and I couldn’t wait to get started. It was the right thing to soldier on (I so nearly didn’t go because I was fed up. I badly needed the distraction. But if he’d not worked out, I had other things lined up. A training opportunity, a fitness goal, a(nother) new hobby, which might have done the trick, who can tell? I’m sure it’s not the only solution. You can’t tell until it’s gone past, can you? And I might live to regret it yet!)