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Original poster

Should I message?

384 replies

AbiVenete · 03/01/2023 10:21

Years ago, while backpacking, I met a man who I instantly clicked with and we had a whirlwind 7 days of the most amazing sex I have ever had. We both had separate flights and we agreed to meet back in UK. He wrote his name and number in a book (this predates mobiles and Facebook) which I then lost.

A few weeks ago, while reading the news online, I instantly recognised his face, name the same… he has just taken a high profile job in my region. I immediately felt that tinge of excitement, looked him up, he’s on LinkedIn but nothing obvious anywhere else so no idea if he’s single or anything.

Am I being ridiculous to think about messaging? He probably a) wont remember me b) is married or unavailable. I am single again and keep drafting messages but unsure exactly what to say. Should I message or just leave it in the past?

OP posts:
rainbowstardrops · 07/01/2023 14:38

Well I'm glad you've met up again and there will at least be a friendship.

Rabbitsandhabits · 07/01/2023 18:56

Interesting that he was honest about the fact he wasn’t completely single but seems he feels he is single enough to be meeting up with an old flame!

did he still have ‘it’ though OP that’s the question?!

LeotardsandDaisies · 07/01/2023 19:06

A friendship sounds perfect at this stage OP

Original poster
AbiVenete · 07/01/2023 19:21

@Rabbitsandhabits I think that was more my feeling and instinct rather than an explicit thing he said. Her, their relationship, the complex way they are co-parenting all felt like there were things not settled yet.

Did he still have it, if I’m honest, yes. The same witty, intelligent charm with deep brown eyes we’re all still there.

OP posts:
nc1013 · 07/01/2023 20:31

Sounds really sensible not to pursue anything at this stage.

Has he actually been divorced since March or separated since March? Reason I ask is that if that's when they split I'm not surprised they're still a bit enmeshed and working through co-parenting arrangements. However a divorce (especially when kids are involved) usually takes at least 2 years after separation, so would be almost 3years since they split?

Lovec · 08/01/2023 08:14

AbiVenete · 03/01/2023 10:21

Years ago, while backpacking, I met a man who I instantly clicked with and we had a whirlwind 7 days of the most amazing sex I have ever had. We both had separate flights and we agreed to meet back in UK. He wrote his name and number in a book (this predates mobiles and Facebook) which I then lost.

A few weeks ago, while reading the news online, I instantly recognised his face, name the same… he has just taken a high profile job in my region. I immediately felt that tinge of excitement, looked him up, he’s on LinkedIn but nothing obvious anywhere else so no idea if he’s single or anything.

Am I being ridiculous to think about messaging? He probably a) wont remember me b) is married or unavailable. I am single again and keep drafting messages but unsure exactly what to say. Should I message or just leave it in the past?

I would message. I mean he didn't know you all that time so even if he thinks you're weird then who really cares? At least he will know why you didn't contact.

Lysianthus · 08/01/2023 10:11

@Lovec It's getting quite exciting!

cowsaysmoo · 10/01/2023 22:16

Any update OP? 🤞

ToBeOrNotToBee · 16/01/2023 11:08

Any more news?

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