Could you date a man who has gone to a strip club?

[CantAskAnyoneElse]

That’s pretty much it.

I’ve been asked out by a friend (man) and I’m not sure if I feel that way about him, he’s nuce enough and I was thinking about it.
But then I remembered how he has said he’s been in some strip clubs in his time.
He seemed pretty happy about those memories, but it just gives me gross feeling.

I know everyone has different standards, but I’m a feminist type, and I don’t think it’s going to be something I’ll be okey with.

It’s a bad idea, right?

I think there’s some difference between a man who has been to one or two on a stag or when drunk and a man who often frequents strip clubs. The latter would definitely give me the ick more than the former but all a bit on the ick side tbh

Did you date the guy op?

That says more about you than any man I know.

No, I did not.
I was too put off by him.

And I know many disagree, but I worry what kind of views men who have been / goes to these places, have of women.
Things don’t happen in vacuum.

And I know many disagree, but I worry what kind of views men who have been / goes to these places, have of women.

That's what I think too.

I just think it's very reductive to judge a person's whole view on half the population of the world on whether they went to a club on a stag do etc .. depends wholly on the circumstances of that individual and how often they go.

Ive seen friends of mine make utter tits of themselves on hen nights groping the male stripper. Are they fundamentally bad people who think badly of men? No.

Missing the point but this did make me

FWIW I wouldn't date a man who thought strip clubs were ok having had a conversation about them.

I would, however, date a man who had been to them in the past as part of a group without really thinking.

I know several men who used to either watch porn or visit strip clubs and saw nothing wrong with it who now tell other men why they think it's a problem.

People can and do change and not everyone has thought about the issues.

I’ve been to a strip club, and had a private dance. 😳🙈 To be fair I was completely pissed off my face, going through an awful divorce and was having a bit of a wild night out with two male co workers. I’m straight, been married twice etc. Dunno what I was thinking to be honest, we all chipped in for me to have a dance as a bit of a laugh. I am literally dying with cringe at myself now. But yeah who am I to judge anyone else? Never done it since, would never do it again.

I think this is wise. I agree with posters saying a couple of trips when drunk or on stag nights when younger doesn't necessarily mean that much (might do, but might not).

How about if they'd been a lot in the past with mates, didn't go now and hadn't been for years, but really justified the harmlessness of the whole industry when first asked about it. Nowadays supposedly thinks differently as has thought about it but only when challenged (a lot!!!).

I guess I'm asking you whether "he" has to think it's not ok already on meeting you or is it ok to be persuaded by you.

Asking for a friend...

🙋‍♀️

I think that most women do not have much of an occasion to ask the men that they are dating, "have you ever gone to a strip club? I doubt it is part of the typical " getting to know you conversation. So it is quite likely that many women have dated and even married men who have had occasion to go to a strip club.

For women who have deeply rooted objections, perhaps the solution is to survey man that you are thinking about dating as to the practices and experiences that are deal breakers for you.

Personally, on the list of deal breakers for me, I doubt that visiting a strip club is something that would have ever even crossed my mind.

There are plenty of women who have also attended these type of events so it’s not a male / female thing - it’s down to the individual.