Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH wants to put dog to sleep

208 replies

mrsjackrussell · 11/12/2022 23:23

I wasn’t sure whether to post in here or doghouse. It is a relationship issue aswell.

I have a 17 year old dog. She has arthritis and is on painkillers for this. Morphine and anti inflammatories. Can’t be walked far at all because of the pain. She goes to hydrotherapy and swims for 10 minutes and the vet says that she is uncomfortable but not in severe pain. The vet and hydro therapist says that it’s only a matter of time before she dies . She limps about indoors, enjoys her food and the rest of the time sleeps.

The issue is that she wees and poos indoors nearly all the time now. It’s been going on for nearly a year even if I have the back door open. She’s not incontinent as she’s goes in certain places. It’s getting us both down but my Dh mainly clears it up because he’s always up early. I’m disabled but can get down and clean it up and do my share although it’s a struggle.

He keeps wanting to get her put to sleep because of this and I don’t agree with it. He says it’s getting him down so much and gets really angry over it like he thinks she does it on purpose. Iv got to the point where Iv called his bluff and said okay book the appointment and you take her but he says that he couldn’t live with himself and that I would hate him. Which I would . We just keep having arguments over it as he keeps getting annoyed and because she’s my dog it’s making me feel like it’s my fault.

Im really disliking him over this. We have other issues anyway but am I over reacting? I just don’t know what I can do about this. I can see his point of view but apart from PTS what else can I do? It’s like he wants me to get angry too and agree with him but I don’t.

OP posts:
Toddlerteaplease · 12/12/2022 19:33

I think your DH is right unfortunately. I wouldn't want a dog if mine to live like that. Life can't be much fun for her.

Toddlerteaplease · 12/12/2022 19:40

Sorry. Didn't read the full thread.

Onnabugeisha · 12/12/2022 19:51

mrsjackrussell · 12/12/2022 18:21

Thank you for all your lovely comments and advice. She is gone now. The vet agreed with our decision.

Oh, it’s the best for your dear dog, but I know you must feel bereft and are grieving. May she rest in peace and I hope the days gets easier for you and your DH.

Onnabugeisha · 12/12/2022 19:52

@secretrugbyfan
Thats a lovely poem. Thank you for sharing it.

mrsjackrussell · 12/12/2022 19:57

secretrugbyfan · 12/12/2022 19:03

I hope this helps......

Thankyou Flowers

OP posts:
Zanatdy · 12/12/2022 19:59

I adore my dog and I say this in the kindest way, it sounds like it’s the right time.

Zanatdy · 12/12/2022 20:00

so sorry OP, sending a big hug

LegodOut · 12/12/2022 20:00

I'm so sorry for your loss OP. Thinking of you X

Interesting comments on this thread about vets taking their lead from the owners regarding PTS timing. I have had several dogs PTS and it has never been at the instigation of the vet. They've always suggested further medical options and it's only when I've said no, I think it's time, that they have agreed that's for the best.

Countsinpotatoes · 12/12/2022 20:02

@mrsjackrussell

I'm sorry to hear that. Even when it's the right decision it's never easy. In some way I hope you gain some reassurance from this thread. When I've been in your position I've felt guilty and it's helped to have other people tell me that it was right even when I've felt rotten

LosAmigos · 12/12/2022 20:02

I really feel for you, but if an animal can't enjoy going out for works and is basically sleeping and weeing/pooing through life, then it's not happy is it? You keep saying that the vet said that your dog is in discomfort and not pain, but even discomfort is not a nice thing to live with. She deserves to live happy and not in any discomfort. Please don't wait til she's even worse and in pain to make that decision.

theresastormcoming · 12/12/2022 20:07

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

elm26 · 12/12/2022 20:25

So sorry for your loss OP, you did the right thing ♥️

OldWivesTale · 12/12/2022 20:26

I would have her pts because she has no quality of life. It's the kindest thing to do. Better if you can get the vet to come to her at home rather than having to take her to the vet where she might get distressed.

abblie · 12/12/2022 20:42

I think your putting your feelings before the dog 😔

Batcountry8 · 12/12/2022 20:46

Again the op has had dog pts today.

WandaWonder · 12/12/2022 20:49

What is best for the dog?

mrsjackrussell · 12/12/2022 20:52

As I have said earlier my dog has already been put to sleep. Thankyou everyone for your kind comments. It wasn't good as it took 40 minutes to get the cannula in but its over now.

OP posts:
mrsjackrussell · 12/12/2022 20:54

Its really helping to read your lovely messages of reassurance. Thank you

OP posts:
PestorPeston · 12/12/2022 20:57

Big hugs, I hope she enjoyed the pate.

Remember you are totally allowed to leak your eyes all over your other two dogs.

Crazypaving22 · 12/12/2022 20:59

I'm so sorry, you did the right thing but it doesn't make the loss any easier. They leave big paw prints on your heart that's for sure.

Flowers
sageandrosemary · 12/12/2022 21:01

Sounds like PTS might be the kindest things, though your OH's reasons feel a bit off.

Prescottdanni123 · 12/12/2022 21:19

So sorry for your loss. I lost one of my dogs at 17 as well. I had her from when I was 8 years old until I was 25. Worst pain I ever felt. It can be so hard to know when to call it in dogs that age but I think you did the right thing.

Newuser82 · 12/12/2022 22:13

Sorry to hear about the cannula, it can be difficult to get them into an older dog. Not nice for you or the dog though. So sorry for your loss.

justasking111 · 12/12/2022 23:00

mrsjackrussell · 12/12/2022 20:52

As I have said earlier my dog has already been put to sleep. Thankyou everyone for your kind comments. It wasn't good as it took 40 minutes to get the cannula in but its over now.

That happened to us took 30 minutes I found it quite harrowing to be honest. Before cannula it was a faster process. I just wanted it over with and it went on and on.

ErrolTheDragon · 12/12/2022 23:17

mrsjackrussell · 12/12/2022 18:21

Thank you for all your lovely comments and advice. She is gone now. The vet agreed with our decision.

Flowers I'm sorry for your loss, but you did the right thing not to delay once you'd made the decision.
Hope you have a peaceful night.

Swipe left for the next trending thread