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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The silent treatment from a narcissist. Help please.

261 replies

SilentRetreat · 04/12/2022 19:35

To say I've gotten myself into a pickle is an understatement. I've been swept up in a shitstorm and should have known better. But here we are.

I was love bombed, then the devaluing began and now seemingly out of the blue he is ignoring me.

After 8 weeks of intense texting and a physical relationship it's really hard to not message to start a conversation about what is going on.

I saw so many red flags along the way that I chose to ignore, thinking it would be fine as the intensity was fun and why not just let myself kept swept along. I gave in to it against my better judgement.

Now it feels really horrible.

Help me to not text him please wise vipers.

OP posts:
SilentRetreat · 19/12/2022 13:11

Yes and he mirrored my interests and personality to lure me in and quite frankly what he showed me was actually my own qualities which were really great.

Peculiar peculiar man.

OP posts:
Youngatheart00 · 19/12/2022 13:21

OP - read all of this thread with such interest and fascination as it pretty much parallels a situation I’m in currently too

end of a long relationship followed by 6-7 months of love bombing from a new guy, who I have a connection with via work, the love bombing interspersed with periods of withdrawal and being downright cold and controlling. I’ve diluted myself so much during the past 7 months and yet he has also been my reason for living.

he’s now gone very cold indeed the past week blaming work and Xmas stress - but I know it’s more than that. It’s like I can never hold him accountable for his behaviour when he’s in a bad mood yet whenever I express anything aside from complete adoration and compliance he goes quiet.

I’m an intelligent, successful mature woman (as I’m sure you are too) so just feel gutted I’ve allowed myself to get pulled in.

and like you, I miss the euphoria of ‘what was’. Please keep talking on here and telling us how your ‘recovery’ goes. You are not alone.

Why are (some) men such controlling, narcissistic tossers??

PeaceJoySleep · 19/12/2022 13:47

Join the club if it's any consolation. You can understand it so completely on a cognitive level but it's still exhausting, emotionally.

So glad your line manager heard from you and isn't judging you

SilentRetreat · 19/12/2022 13:51

He was legendary.

Line manager said well done and I should feel empowered going forward into single life that I'm not to be taken for a fool. Also that the guy has form and he has noticed him making moves on others with similar outcomes. I'm not the first to block him so he needn't act so surprised.

And there was me terrified he'd be angry with me for being so silly.

OP posts:
Sandra1984 · 19/12/2022 13:55

Hi,

I'm another narc survivor. I was head over heels over my narc. My golden period lasted 2 months, the devaluation lasted 3 months. Then we broke up/he discarded me, it was my most toxic relationship EVER. This man had a restraining order from his "crazy ex" (observe commas, just throwing that in...). It has taken me almost 5 months of not seeing him at all and self reflection to get over this person. I feel I was in a "cult of one". I'm also a mature successful woman and I feel so embarrassed I fell for this crap. I'm so happy now, I feel healed but it took me 5 months of no contact. It's a very long time. I just started dating again. I'll never EVER fall with a narc. I've built myself a very finely tuned red flag detector...

SilentRetreat · 19/12/2022 14:22

I'm so sorry for all of your heartbreak.

The cycle seems to short. You'd think they'd want to stay in the lovebombing exciting stage for longer.

I believe mine was all over so quickly because I gave no fight or chase whatsoever. Literally handed him all the power on a plate and sat back to see what he did with it. That was never his goal though was it. His supply came from the chase and the toying with the mouse like you all said.

OP posts:
Reindeersnooker · 19/12/2022 15:09

You've been so clever and had such a lucky escape.

Homebaby · 19/12/2022 17:50

I've been in your position recently op and the many others who have commented on this thread, I'm in awe of you for dealing with it so swiftly and not allowing your emotions to get in the way of what needed to be done.
The one thing I would say is beware the hoover, you'd think he wouldn't have the gall to try it but I can pretty much guarantee he will. That's how I got sucked back in after initially dumping his sorry arse. I need to work on that, or preferably meet better men 😂 You sound a bit more resilient than me but still be on your guard and remember the crap he's put you through however much time passes!

SilentRetreat · 19/12/2022 18:35

Yes I need to be careful as I'd be so fascinated by observing his behaviour that I'd find it hard to ignore completely.

OP posts:
KettrickenSmiled · 19/12/2022 19:06

We communicated once at work and he was basically angry at the blocking but showed no interest in the reasons for it. No interest in my feelings.
😂You're not allowed feelings. They are inconvenient. They might take the form of being angry about his ghosting, (& hypocrisy!) or pull him up on the way he treats his sexual prey interests generally, or tell him how ungentlemanly is is to show other people your ex's messages.

So I'm the bad guy.
DARVO! You know this now, recite the word like a mantra when the feelings of frustrated unfairness rise.

After that conversation I had a bit of a wobble emotionally and took myself to my line manager to explain the situation. He was incredibly supportive and understanding and the fear of exposure has gone.
Fuck my old boots that is a MAJOR accomplishment!
What a bullet to bite, & what a result 😁

So yes, blocking and moving on had the desired effect. He is no longer acknowledging my existence in the corridor and whether his intention is to make me uncomfortable or not, I no longer care. Genuinely. I now see him and think what was I thinking?
3 cheers for OP.
When he deigns to communicate again (Hoovering risk, remember?) DO NOT be tempted to JADE, express any personal feelings, or get sucked into any non-work debate.
All you need is "I don't know why you're raising this again, I'm not interested in men who blow hot & cold so we're done, but I expect to remain courteous & colleagues. If you have a problem with that, I advise you to raise it with my line manager, so he can put you straight on professional conduct requirements. OK, busy day, bye".

He is gone, quickly and quietly like I'd hoped for so thank you for giving me the permission to do something so out of character and not try to make it all ok.
You've learned a hell of a lot in a very short time & have been brave enough to implement that hard-won new knowledge.
This isn't the end of the learning curve btw - this stuff acts sort of exponentially: you are going to grow, & keeping growing on the back of it.

That "not try to make it ok" is key to genuine assertiveness.
Which doesn't mean instant ease or some aspirational state of imagined perfection. I can still struggle with the "but I want them to UNDERSTAND so they'll stop doing this shit!" aspect you were probably feeling at his "no interest in reasons or my feelings" moment.
Because our default position, as reasonable & fair communicators, is that other people are coming from the same stance. It can be shocking, overwhelming & unbelieveable to find out they are not, & never will be.
Part of the "getting to meh" (see ChumpLady - your version is "I don't care & what was I thinking" - same thing) is reconciling that frustrated wish to be heard, to be mutually fair & understood. within ourselves, without expecting to be able to externalise it on its source as we would be able to with a well-adjusted person who had upset us.

So keep your guard up against potential mindgames that invite you to try to do just that. Believe me - he knows how "norms" react to being unheard, treated unfairly & wilfully misunderstood. It would delight him to see you tie yourself in knots trying to explain that to him, while he plays the victim who only wanted to devour 'love' you ...

KettrickenSmiled · 19/12/2022 19:10

SilentRetreat · 19/12/2022 13:51

He was legendary.

Line manager said well done and I should feel empowered going forward into single life that I'm not to be taken for a fool. Also that the guy has form and he has noticed him making moves on others with similar outcomes. I'm not the first to block him so he needn't act so surprised.

And there was me terrified he'd be angry with me for being so silly.

OMG this is a fantastically good result. How lovely to know your line mgr is an insightful, observant, decent guy who has your back Flowers

SilentRetreat · 19/12/2022 19:33

@KettrickenSmiled you are amazing. Every word you type is brilliant.

Boss was amazing really. He brought the humour back to the situation and it all felt much less dark.

I do know I'm just doing the logical thing. My emotional self hasn't 100% caught up. And I'm likely very vulnerable to him hoovering so I'm glad he's angry and staying away. My boredom and loneliness hasn't gone either and my wish for things to be friendly I know is an Achilles heel. This guy activated my chimp brain and i do feel a loss at that.

That's why I've come back to this thread. I need the journey here for posterity. Going to brush up on DARVO and JADE as not familiar.

Hope this thread is useful for others stuck in the cycle.

OP posts:
Holibobby · 19/12/2022 21:41

This thread has really helped me too as I’m in a similar situation. Thank you for all the words of advice and wisdom.

Waternearth · 19/12/2022 22:43

What you must keep in mind is a visual of having kids with this freak.

You must never text him or empire yourself into a situation with him.

An also give some thought as to what made you vulnerable to his bullshitter love bombing stage. You need to get immune to that for posterity. When people compliment me I find it a bit of a joke as in 'wtf are you saying?'. Be careful on accepting compliments too soon and reevaluate why they are saying the things they are saying.

SilentRetreat · 20/12/2022 10:37

No chance of having kids with him but my children should never be exposed to a guy like this. No no no.

And yes the compliments were hilarious to me at the time. I openly said 'wow you are impressed with the dullest things I do'. I think it was the attention rather than the specific compliments. He could have and did say any old shite and I went along for the ride.

The good morning texts were like a shot of dopamine straight to my soul.

OP posts:
Youngatheart00 · 21/12/2022 11:38

I am really struggling today.

is it possible to die of a broken heart?

I hate the impact this relationship has had on me

Waternearth · 21/12/2022 17:48

OMG @Youngatheart00 are you absolutely joking?

Read what @SilentRetreat posted above you - saying that the morning texts were like dopamine straight to the soul.

I mean seriously, replay the dopamine texts with the shit abuse texts that come only weeks after the dopamine ones and ask yourself do you want such shite in your life?

I would rather watch the paint dry all day and all night and be happy single than in a shit relationship that has ups and downs. Yes, it fills up your time, but with shit. It does not fill in constructive ways it should be filled, like healthy relationships.

Love the shit alone and you will do better for it.

Do not be tempted to reconnect with a shit.

Hope this advice keeps you on the straight and narrow.

Youngatheart00 · 21/12/2022 18:46

Thank you @Waternearth for the sense check. Emotions are such scary, powerful things aren’t they especially when combined with low self esteem

Homebaby · 21/12/2022 19:07

@Youngatheart00 don't beat yourself up, what you're feeling is natural. It's a trauma bond, absolute hell to live with but not love. And you will get through it. I know it's tough but every time you think about a good time you had together try to think that it was all part of the manipulation, it wasn't real. We were a pawn in a game we didn't know we were playing.

Savvysausage · 21/12/2022 19:08

@Waternearth that is insightful. I must say that the thought of sharing a child with such an individual would scare me shitless.

I too would rather be alone than in an abusive relationship.

Youngatheart00 · 21/12/2022 19:26

Trauma bond sounds about right. So traumatic.

tengreenbottleshanging · 21/12/2022 20:00

Think just three occasions where he was an absolute prick eg something he said, something he did, a time when he let you down.....Use those memories to override those happy buzzy loved up memories.A type of CBT almost.swop up those memories every single time.THAT is who he actually is.... Believe me, I'm having to do this now and again even though I wouldn't dream to go near him again and have no interest anymore but recognise that the good times were the best times I ever had. They were manipulative ,nasty acts to reel you in. The latter man is the real deal.

Sandra1984 · 21/12/2022 20:35

The golden period with a narcissist is absolutely amazing!

Sandra1984 · 21/12/2022 20:36

That’s how they hook you up.

stongerbytheday · 21/12/2022 20:37

But so unworthy it though @Sandra1984

I mean the consequences are horrific.

I would now seriously doubt someone's investment in me - as to wtf do they want? It's not normal to be so praised or cherished. It's the cheap stuff like that that has horrific consequences because even a few months abuse can scar you for years to come.

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