Am I in the wrong for wanting him to stay at home

[FoxyBloxy]

I have either a stomach bug or food poisoning. I feel dreadful. I have been pretty much living on the toilet all last night and this morning. I have hardly slept for needing the toilet in the night. I am currently curled up in a ball with the most horrendous stomach cramps. I feel sick. I am knackered. He is going playing football today and will be out from 12-7. We have 2 dc and the thought of being in with them all day alone when I feel like this is making me want to cry. I asked him if he would miss it just this once but he kicked off saying no. The football isn’t compulsory, he won’t get a fine or get kicked out of the team or anything like that for not going. I am just so annoyed and fed up☹️

If she does that he will make sure the children suffer such that she won't dare do it again

Terrible. Absolutely terrible. We went on holiday partly so Dh could do a sporting event I fell I’ll while there he didn’t do the event and didn’t say a word about it

Chilli powder in his shorts would be nice too

Bottom line is his loyalty to his team wates trumps his loyalty to his wife and children, think on this OP.... what do you owe this man who puts his football teammates above his wife and children?

Exactly this.

My xh wasn't at the birth of our first child because he was playing football.

On our discharge day I had to discharge myself early so he would give me a lift home, he dropped me off to play football and buggered off until the pub closed at 2ish.

I put a frozen ready meal in the oven and looked at my DC and wanted to cry for us both.

There are a lot of selfish vile blokes around.

He's dreadful

The selfishness and callousness of men described by their partners on Mumsnet never fails to amaze me. How did OP and all the others ever get into a relationship with such horrible men?
That you are even asking if YABU to expect love and care, especially when so ill, OP, suggests that self-esteem may be an issue, though it is a good sign that you are so angry. Of course YANBU, and of course you should expect better of your man than this selfish specimen. He sounds more concerned with his mates than with you and his DC. Insist he stays to look after the DC as you are not in a fit state to do so. He is responsible for their care - that is not negotiable. Sorry it must be so miserable for you right now. Hope you feel better soon.

I couldn’t love a man like that. I would literally fall out of love with him immediately this happened and then I’d start making plans to leave. You might as well be a single mother anyway.

Omg I feel your pain, I’ve got my son’s stomach bug and there’s no way on this earth that I’d be able to look after my 3 and 1 year olds.
is there anyone outside of the home that can help? I hope it passes soon for you. The stomach cramps are unbearable 😖

I would never live with someone with an intense hobby out of the house.. The things women put up with!

He’s already left the house. What a horrible horrible man.

I'd put my coat on and go out (mums, premier in ... anywhere with a loo)

When he realised he can't just leave because the kids are there he may realise the predicament his football would put you in. Absolute arsehole. Glad it's not just mine today 👊

Sorry just realised he's left. Could anyone come round and help you?

Me too, although we didn't have children. He even postponed our honeymoon for a company football match. Also thankfully ex

He is an utter wanker. Why do men get to do this? I hope he gets it and you can leave him at home with the kids for the day, because I damn well would with no hesitation.

Make sure you clean the toilet with his toothbrush, then LTB and make sure he gets the kids every Saturday.

I hope you feel better soon and today isn't too horrid for you.

I hope you feel better soon. And leave this selfish man. Don’t bring your children up with him as an example.

I’m a firm believer that parents should be allowed hobbies; but 7hours every Saturday is taking the absolute piss even if you weren’t ill.

Given that you are ill, the absolute least he could do is only go, play the match, then come back. The fact that he’s not even willing to do that speaks volumes.

He’s said it himself - he views it as your Job to take care of the children. In his eyes you’re not a family and you’re not his partner; you’re live-in Staff. Except Staff would be entitled to time off, sick pay, holidays, and wouldn’t be obliged to provide sexual favours.

Start getting your house in order, because a relationship with a man with this level of entitlement will not go the distance.

I'm sorry but he's hideous. You need to be on your guard with him as if anything ever goes wrong for you health wise and you couldn't provide the service levels required (it's all about him) he'd be off. I've just supported my bff through this very scenario and it's been horribly painful. Please use his toothbrush!

What a selfish arsehole. Time for a radical rethink about your relationship.

I’d leave over this. Not today. But it would be the end for me.

for today though, can you ask a neighbour for help? I’d absolutely cover for a stranger in these circumstances. Or if there’s a local WhatsApp/Facebook/whatever group see if there’s a local teen who’ll come and occupy the kids while you go to bed. Obviously it will cost you but if there’s money for post match beer there’s money to ensure the kids are ok.

I hope you feel better soon.

I wouldn't do nothing tommorow and refuse to get out of bed.

My ex left me to go to work, followed by a night out, with work the following day when I was clearly very ill ( turned out I had pneumonia ) with two under two. Some things you can never forgive.

What an arsehole