Husband cheating with woman 37 years younger than me

[HeartBrokenWife]

I feel broken. I had no idea he’d fallen out of love with me. I’m 61 and he’s a little bit younger, but the woman he’s having an affair with is just so much younger than me that it has made me feel almost suicidal. I’m not going to do anything to myself, but I can’t eat or sleep and he’s just smirking at me. I feel utterly humiliated.

My daughter is taking me to a solicitor tomorrow and I’m going to start divorce proceedings, but I feel hollowed out inside and I’m asking myself over and over what I did wrong. I couldn’t help growing older. I’m so sad 😭

Meant to add, be prepared for how this will go. 99 times out of 100, he’ll follow The Script. Google it, or there’s a good thread here.

Basically, he’ll make you think you’re the one at fault. You’ll second-guess yourself constantly, feel guilty, feel ashamed. You’ll be tempted to do the “pick me” dance- show him what he’s missing. Beg him to reconsider.

Then he’ll paint a picture of domestic bliss. You’ll hear he’s out and about with his girlfriend and her child, new lease on life, probably gets his teeth done in Turkey and starts working out.

Then he’ll tell you it’s not working and wants to come crawling back, maybe give himself a second opportunity to cheer on your at a later date.

Divorce him as soon as possible. Take your share of assets before he fritters them away on another woman.

Men and their dicks!! Pause this moment in time, fast forward a year from now. I'll guarantee you she's off having realised he's not the catch she thought he was and you have moved on and divorced the A-Hole.. karma is good and always works. I'm sorry your going through what you are right now but pull up your big girl pants in ride this god dam storm. Your coming out the other side looking fabulous.

He’s her boss. It feels as though I’m in a really crap TV programme, but it’s real 😥

Thank you. I’ll read that now xxx

Is he well off? That’s the only reason I can think of that she’d be interested in someone so much older who she almost certainly will outlive.

He should feel humiliated, not you. So many men do this. For some reason they feel entitled to behave that way. It’s pathetic.

What a stupid vain man. Get your divorce & live your new life exactly as you want to. Guaranteed after his relationship falls apart, he'll hop from relationship to relationship.
My ex is still doing this & just looks like a sad lonely old git. I'm living my best life & loving it.
You will be ok. Stay 💪

So what did you see in your nearly forty year older boss, single mother at 24?

Hint: it wasn’t his sexy butt.

Keep your head up high, he is the idiot and will regret taking on someone so young with a child (daughter & grandchild vibes). He won’t be able to keep up and when you get half his money she will be gone. My mil found love at 59 after my fil died and is happy, she says live begins at 60. Wishing you all the best xxx

He is following his dick down a route to a lonely old age. Keep the rage and let it carry you through the process of the divorce. Your DD must be so cross with him. Why do they do it? Have they not watched all the soaps and seen where this leads for them?

What a sad old git he is. Hold your head high, OP, and take him to the cleaners. Don’t let him crawl back when his girlfriend tires of his wrinkly old arse. You can walk away with dignity - he clearly has none whatsoever.

Daft prick

Wow he’s a catch 😉 she’ll be fed up of him very soon I’m sure, once all the initial giddiness wears off and reality sets in.

I am so sorry you are going through this. My first dh left me for an ex he’d had before me he’d found through Facebook….! There really are some utter arses in this world.

It may not feel it now but you will be okay. And you’ll get stronger and eventually you’ll see him for the prick he is. And by then he’ll probably be alone and you’ll have a better life without him.

Like many others before him he's been led by his ego and his dick. What an idiot. Esp when he wakes up one day and realise his fling is only interested in his money, has Daddy issues and that he has to go through being a (step) dad again. Then she will wake up one day and think eww what am I doing with this man old enough to be my father, that he can't keep up with her in many ways and will start looking at men her own age. You , on the other hand, will wake up one day, after divorcing the shit that cheated on you and think to yourself, fantastic, I'm over him, I'm not going to waste another minutes energy on him, will enjoy your new found freedom and enjoy your life and have some new adventures. At the moment, you won't be able to see this but it'll happen. You've just got to hold tight and get through this. Don't worry about leaning on your dd, she's probably just glad to be able to be of support to you.

Hope he has a good pension, make sure you take half.

She will lose interest in him in a matter of weeks, no 24 year old wants a man in his late 50s for anything but financial/career/status profit. She'll use him then chick him. Be smart. Get what's yours before this happens and get well rid of him. He'll be left with his head in his hands and try to come crawling back to you, begging soon enough. Don't let him.

I can sympathise. It must be something in the water. My DB of the same age is seeing a woman of 37 years younger too. He wasn't married though. Take all the support you can get.

Gross. Sorry this is happening

Gross. The only person humiliated here is him.

Take him to the cleaners OP.

Don’t worry about your dd.it’s our jobs at a certain age,to be there for you like you have for us.and we are more than ready and raring for it. There would be no question of me for my mum.I’d be pissing her off I’d be there for her so much haha.
keep going through the motions.and the emotions.they will come in waves.and be different sizes but you must allow yourself to feel them all in order to heal.

She’s using him for the potential for possible promotions and the money in his bank account.
Take out the money you need, change the passwords, freeze the accounts. Change your will without delay.
He’s a vain fool who has stopped looking in a mirror, stopped seeing himself as a 61 year old. He’ll come to no good. Ignore the script. Don’t listen to a word he says.
This isn’t a reflection on you in the slightest. You’re perfectly okay, normal: he’s a prat. You’ll be better off without him and have years of fun ahead of you though it doesn’t seem like that now.
Onward and upward, OP.

If he’s a little younger than you, this girl has got to be, what, 21/22? With a young son?

He is utterly disgusting. Destroy him.

I’m going to try to go to sleep now. I’ve barely slept since I found out. I really need to have a clear head for tomorrow morning though. I think I’ll feel better when I know roughly what I’m entitled to. He’s not rich, sadly, but I’m hoping there will be enough money for me to buy a small flat or even a tiny cottage. I always look at cute cottages when we go on holiday and imagine living in one. Maybe I can! He can live in a swamp for all I care, preferably one infested with crocodiles.

I’m so sorry it’s happening to you too xxx It’s bloody horrible 😥

His peers and people who work for him will be laughing at him. How could they not. He is a cliche.

Get even. Get a shit hot lawyer.

Recover. Take a holiday with your daughter. Look after you.

Re evaluate what you want the rest of your life to look like. Even if not a holiday, I'd get away for a bit of whatever time you can & Make plans for the rest of your life.this is your change everything you want to time.

Read some books about mental health, positive thinking and the like. Even if it's just a chapter a day. Read a page every time you use the loo, but read it and think about it.

He is an old fool.

Fast forward 20 years and she's a woman in her prime, pushing around an old codger on a wheelchair?
I highly doubt she'll stay around!!