Dating thread 234 ... spooky times ahead

[BelladiMamma]

New thread!

Could someone else please copy and paste the rules ...?

I think pacing ourselves is quite hard to do but we need to learn this Oncey
i can’t overinvest on someone I’ve had 3 dates with. That’s clear

So easy to say @Mila14 and not so easy to do. Especially if they have set the pace, the intensity, the passion, the exclusivity plus I only really have time in my diary (and loins) for one bloke at a time (currently one a week!)

Thanks to this thread and the people on it I've bitten the bullet and got myself a weekly therapist starting next Monday. Specifically to address my anxious attachment/abandonment issues.

That reminds me how I laughed (gently and kindly) when MrLocal confessed he had PTSD and had seen a therapist once and was amazed it hadn't sorted him out. No one had told him one session unlikely to be enough. Bless.

I completely suck at pacing. I’m putting Mr2Pugs in charge of it. He’s much more sensible than I am. And he’s right.

Well done Eeky, it’s good to delegate. Just enjoy Mr2 pugs

@ibelieveinmirrorballs you are SO right. Mr2Pugs is a prolific and attentive texter. Absolutely nothing even slightly romantic at all (apart from the sleazy car sex thing, and that was a flash in the pan!) or even vaguely complimentary, just a genuine interest in my life and what I DO. And those dopamine hits are sexy and madly addictive. If it fizzled out, there’d be an awful emptiness left behind, I think. Not looking forward to that (I know he’s lovely and all, but consider the odds)

Finally getting to see Mr medic again tomorrow evening! Been 2 weeks and quietly excited about seeing him again as our recent coms been going well ☺️

That's it @Eeksteek! Thank you if you are doing all day long lols and exchanges of info and funny things and songs etc if they do a sudden drop/fade/ghost you suddenly have a blank space which their comms filled.
It isn't just the bruised ego it's like your little private hobby and chum (and yes yes of course the dopamine) has been taken away and it's such fun having a funny intelligent man send you things that genuinely make you laugh and splutter. When they go it is a teeny bit sad FOR A DAY 🤭🤨

Hi all,

I've got someone that I've started talking to earlier this week. He's younger than me and when we first started chatting I liked how inclusive he sounded forwards disabled people. He's keen to meet up as well.

Unfortunately, he's one of those 'cheeky' types of people who thinks sex will solve everything. I've been on strong tablets (Naproxen) for the past week, because of Back pain, and I've been feeling hideous, and haven't left my bed all week.

He massaged asking how I was yesterday, so I told him that I wasn't feeling well, and he said something like 'should I get you in the mood?' We had some very mild sexual chat the day before, and he said something like 'you were a right dirty slut yesterday, haha.'

I've never been called that before and it unnerved me a bit. I'm really not sure about him now, after that. I told him that if he knew me, he would know that I'm not a slut. It felt like he'd abused me somewhat by saying it, though that might sound a little mellow dramatic. He doesn't know about my SS yet.

I want to stop talking to him, but I want to tell him why, any ideas about what I could say. It's freaked me out a bit.

SS = Sexual Status

So I checked in with NoShow about the quality of sex, the answer was “okay”, WTF does
“okay” mean, not good/ not bad, average?

Wish I hadn’t asked now

Instant block from me @ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers. He won't need telling why, he knows

Thanks @Slothmomma. I'm okay with a bit of banter at times, but calling me a slut is going too far, I think.

I've blocked and deleted him now. ❤️

Super Slothy…MrMedic is a decent chap. It’s good you see how it goes

@Slothmomma and good news about Mr M ❤️

You should not have asked Howlongy, but for many women super good sex with a man is not everything. We aspire to that but settle for less if all else is great. At least she doesn’t do BS

Agree

Yeah, she does tend to call a spade a spade, which I quite like, but her honesty is a bit brutal at times

@NoDatingForOldMen can I just ask why you asked?

I'd really struggle if I was asked. I'd feel much more comfortable discussing it face to face.

Thanks peeps ❤️

Erm…a new iron has started chatting me up. He’s nice and handsome and slightly shorter than Mr F at 6’2” but this is a very handsome man and with kids too. I wasn’t expecting this but we will do video call on Saturday. Conversation is polite and fluent as I prefer it. Problem is he’s not in London but not very far. I will keep him in back burner until I see what’s up with Mr F. I think it’s quite funny how when you least expect it OLD surprises you.
I’m philosophical about this OLD…while you are getting to know someone you can meet someone else 😛

Well done @ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers …just block and delete when you feel the chatting is disrespectful. No explanation needed

@Mila14 👍🏻🙂

Good call. Nothing about sex between consenting adults is dirty and slut is a misogynist slur. You deserve a guy who listens and empathises when you are in pain, not one who thinks his pleasure will cure your pain! Who feels sexy in their bed of pain FFS!?

So sorry to hear that you're in pain @ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers

I have had to take a fair whack of Naproxen in the past and it properly knocks you out. Take care 🧡