Sex while asleep

[Rachellilllian]

I woke up a night ago as my partner turned me over and started having sex with me, I was fast asleep when he started. They was no hug or fondle just straight in. 18 months together and he has never done this before, but I feel uncomfortable. When I asked me about it the morning, he just said sorry that he didn’t know who had started it.

So you didn't say this then:

Must admit my boyfriend does this every now and then and I love it. Waking up with him inside me is great. But it’s something we both know is OK, which it the important thing. This sounds a bit more grey area - was he awake?

Yes I said that, but I didn’t “go on about my amazing sex live”. That was the wake-up blow job enthusiast.

I really, really wish posters would stop talking about how they enjoy being woken up with sex.

This is not what happened to the OP. Your relationships are not relevant.

If anything, it's minimising what OP has been through and it's fucking disgusting.

Someone did this to me. Not my partner - I'd crashed at a platonic work "mate's" house and woke up in the morning to him on top of me. Luckily I shouted at him to get the fuck off and he did as he weighed twice what I did. I didn't know it was rape, it was 20 years ago, but I knew it felt utterly horrible. He also said sorry. Just because someone is your partner doesn't make it ok.

@ParentallyUnprepared so true ffs. If someone posted 'my boyfriend grabbed me against my will, pinned me up against the wall and raped me', would they reply 'oh I love rough sex, it really turns me on'?

THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE WRITING. The fact you enjoy a slightly similar but actually very different consensual sex act is irrelevant and so unhelpful.

Why the desperation to silence those with different points of view? This is a discussion forum, not a no discussion forum.

Ugh how unnecessarily graphic on this thread in particular (not you knittingaddict, the quoted post). How unbelievably crass to mention how much you enjoy it when OP has been raped in the same way. Vile.

There is no different view when it comes to rape, except the rapists, which is an illegal one. This has been explained to you many times already. If you have nothing supportive to add, why are you still here? What wisdom exactly do you think you’re adding?

He raped you and now he's being cold because he knows what he's done.

It's upto you whether you want to report him to the police or not but be gentle on yourself. Speaking to someone will probably help, you've been raped and it will take you a while to fully digest what's happened to you.

Have you got a friend you can reach out to? I'd want to know if it were one of my friends so I could be there for her.

Perhaps posters should bear in mind that there are often men on here pretending to be women.

I reckon I can see at least three on here.

I MAY be wrong of course, but the tone of some posts suggests excitement rather than disgust.

Triggering for me I'm afraid...

I have spoken to crisis and I don’t need to act on anything immediately I can try and process it first. I have arranged to speak to a counsellor that was recommend from another friend who is a counsellor. I think this has hit me hard I was sexually abused my dad, something he know all about. I was asked by police if I wanted to press charges, I was 13 and I said no. It’s something that’s lives with me every day. He has msg me but I have ignored it. Saying it on here has made me realise it was not ok what he has done

She didn’t drip feed anything. Her first post was incredibly thorough and gave us all the information we needed to respond.

How dare you try to blame the OP for your disgusting comments in an attempt to excuse them.

You’re actually vile.

It's not desperation, it's decency.

If you have red flags OP perhaps this needs to be the end. Don't even confront him just erase his completely because I doubt he will admit to what he was doing.

I said this very early in the thread before OP drip fed us more details.

You are coming across as such a revolting person

The OP is a rape victim, she's traumatised, no wonder she doesn't have every single detail in her opening post. But you just have to make a snide dig about 'drip feeding' to justify your dodgy posts.

Exactly, looking at OP's posts she mentioned she was uncomfortable and had been crying about it within 8 minutes of starting the thread. She didn't drip feed anything.

@DontBlameMe79

You're a thoroughly disgusting human being.

I'm so sorry this has happened to you and that he betrayed your trust in such a horrific way. The fact he knew you were a victim of abuse makes it even more unforgiveable, if that's actually possible. To me he sounds like a predator who thought he could get away with this because he'd be aware that victims of CSA often have reduced boundaries due to their PTSD.

You're doing the right thing by reaching out for help. If you can, go to a safe place tonight that he doesn't know the location of.

The people who are trying to justify/explain/obfuscate what happened to the OP on this thread make me sick...

Nobody wants to hear your dodgy ''point of view''.

A man should not force himself on a sleeping woman. it doesn't matter if they are married/dating/had sex a few hours before that.

Your partner's body is not an object that you can just use as you please while they are not conscious of what is happening to them.

if you can't grasp that you are just a rape-apologist.

OP I hope you can get some support and please kick this man out of your life.

I’m so sorry OP. I hate to say it, but your disclosure of previous abuse may have been like a green light to a disgusting creature like him. I was abused by my dad too, and I’ve certainly run into men since who see it as some kind of sign that you’ll be an easy target.

I agree that you're a rape apologist.