Relationship ended for no reason

[ChasingRainbows123]

Met a guy on OLD, dating for 8 months & everything going well.
We both suspended our profiles.
Messaged most days & saw each other most weekends.
He lives 40 mins away & he works away Mon - Fri & I have two young kids.
Previous weekend he offered to cook a meal for us at his house.
It was lovely, a great evening.
Messaged the following week as normal.
Didn't see him at the weekend as he had to work on the Saturday & my kids were with me.
Messaging ok & on the Sunday we arranged that he would come up to mine the following weekend. All arranged.
About 3 hours later he sends a message on facebook messenger where we chatted for no reason which said
"I'm done with this. A big part of my life will dissappear. I will survive"
That meant me obviously.
I read it & he had unfriended me & blocked me so I couldnt reply.
I tried to ring him as this was so out of character for him.
Worried that something was wrong I drove to his house.
I knocked on the door & stood on doorstep & asked if he was ok & he said yes he was going to bed as up at 4.30am for work.
I asked him why he blocked & unfriended me & he yelled & shouted at me waving his hands & said no I didn't I have been talking to my sister.
I said again is everything alright are you ok?
He shouted again just go or I'll ring the police & he started to put 9 into his phone so I came away.
I never heard from the police. But you dont block & unfriend someone your dating for no reason. Then threaten to ring police for no reason when someone checks up on you.
Is this narcissist behaviour or mental health issues.
I can't get it out of my head that I did something wrong to cause all of this.

I don't think you did anything wrong, I'd be thinking I'd had a very lucky escape and be blocking him now

Are you sure he's not married?

No hes not married.
Lives on his own.
His ex wife lives down south & he has an 18 year old daughter who he used to see but now he has no contact with her.
She ignores any messages, cards etc
The way he did it makes me think I did something wrong

You dodged a bullet there OP. My guess is he's already in a relationship or maybe separated and wanting to get back.

I don't think you did anything wrong OP.

Sounds like you've had a lucky escape. I'd jus DD is not in contact with him, I think it speaks volumes.

He sounds very unstable and narcissistic.

Horrible way to end things, so I’d say he has shown his true colours. Don’t respond to any attempts to contact you, should he try to do so in future.

Sorry OP, horrible for you to have this happen.

I don’t think you did anything wrong, what was the sister comment?, maybe he thinks you have said something to someone? ( but could be a line)

Sorry what, you were sending his wife or his daughter messages and cards? Why?

I've had very very similar happen recently and I completely understand how you feel. Its such a cruel way for things to end with no closure. It's pretty much being discarded and it's awful. I have my suspicions for my own situation...either someone else or severe issues and either option isn't great.

I think she means he does and they get ignored by the ex wife and daughter, not that OP sends them anything.

Lucky escape OP. He might not have been completely honest with you and then decided to take cowards way out and block you.
You won’t get an answer on this.

No I dont have any contact with his ex wife or daughter. He sends the daughter Christmas & birthday cards but get no thankyou or messages.
He doesn't get any cards from his daughter.
She has stopped contact with him for no reason.
His version of events.
It was the way everything was ok & he had arranged to come to mine following weekend.
Then for no reason he sent that message a few hours later.
I will never know why.
His whole behaviour was strange even when I went to see if he was ok
Thats what makes me feel like I did something wrong to cause this.
Never experienced narcissist behaviour or something with mental health issues so didn't know if this was it

You don't seriously think he would try & contact me after what he has done.
Do you ?

Don't give him the option. Block him.

The way he did it makes me think I did something wrong

No, but this line of thinking will explain why you missed the signs. It's not you. None of the little niggles you will have been feeling are you, except that they represent your boundaries, and the feeling of them being breached, or close to it.

Ah yes, that makes more sense!

What an upsetting experience, OP. I hope you're feeling all right. No wonder his daughter cut off contact with him.

I don't know if it's mental health issues or what. But whatever the reason, you're not to blame. And please don't start feeling you should be trying to help him. You're not his therapist.

Better luck next time.

Surely the sister comment is key to this?
Ask his sister what she told him about you to cause this shift?

She has stopped contact with him for no reason.

There will be a reason all right. But I doubt he would have ever told you what it is. You have seriously dodged a bullet here.

He seems to have form for stopping contact for no reason, so I'd doubt the veracity of this.

His daughter has stopped contact with him 'for no reason'. I don't believe this.

Thanks for reply.
I'm doing ok.
Feel a bit hurt at the way things ended with no warning.
Then when I drove to his to check if he was ok & he started shouted & waving his hands at me. Shouting just go or I'll ring the police.
I was stood on doorstep & hes shouting that at someone who has taken time to check hes ok.
Thats why sometimes I think I was to blame in some way.

Don't give it head space. You've had a lucky escape

He's obviously not a nice person. Even the daughter doesn't bother with him. Move on.

No one needs a reason for ending a relationship