Traditions in his family are weird, If I have to do that. I will do it myself!!!

[newmumy2022]

My partner's family tradition is weird.
Must have had earrings in my daughter's ears when she was three months old.
I was resistant. But if I really had to do it, I would do it myself.

Is there anyone in or around Liverpool who has done Baby ear piercings?
Any good places to recommend?
And what kind of earrings should I prepare?

I wonder if maybe this kind of mini earrings could fit?

https://www.trendollajewelry.com/collections/nap-earrings/products/trendolla-king-crown-earrings-ball-back-earrings-nap-earrings

Help!!!
FFFF!!!

Ear peircing at birth is normal in some countries and honestly I think it's fine. That's not really the point though. You're the mother, and the baby isn't living in those countries now

Just because it's normal doesn't mean it's fine. Piercing the ears of an infant can lead to deformities, injuries and infection, and that's before you even touch the issues of consent.

This doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship OP and I advice you to seek help if he’s controlling in any way. I understand there’s a cultural difference at play here but it’s your child and if your husband doesn’t respect your wishes there’s a much bigger problem than whether or not to get your baby’s ears pierced. When you asked the question “how did you go about it”, to the poster who said they refused to get their baby’s ears pierced, that is very telling. In my culture if one parent wants something and another does not, the parent who does NOT overrules the parent who does, that is, if a compromise cannot be met.
If you feel this is the wrong thing to do, voice it very clearly. If they overrule you as the child’s mother, I would seek professional help. Good luck.

You are her mother, if you don’t want to pierce her ears then don’t do it! I always feel so sorry for babies when they have their ears pierced. Why would you do that to a baby. Also if your husband would fall out with you over this, you deserve better than him! Traditions should be left in the past sometimes.

You're saying it's weird then researching crown design earrings?

Tell your partner that you will agree to the ear piercing when he agrees to a vasectomy without a local anaesthetic. And he goes first.

Say no on repeat. Say you think she should be able to consent when she's older.

My DD is nearly 16. We got it done first at Claire's when she was 12. She wanted it done. Poor advice led to infection and a night in hospital. We let them close up.

More recently a woman who does piercing as her main profession did a double piercing on either side of the scar tissue. Loads of advice, free follow-up, said she was always happy to see DD again and check. We have been very happy so far.

But there was a lot of pain, expense involved and DD decided she wanted it done, not us, her parents.

If you are looking at how to best hurt your baby in order to placate your partner and his family, then none of you are safe to look after her properly.

You are her mother, you should be fighting for her well-being- not using her as a prop to keep your partner.

To be blunt, you sound too immature to be a parent. Stand up for your daughter's health and stop typing like a teenage girl ("!!!!!!"). She's a baby, you have a voice, USE IT.

First uncircumcised boys for generations here. I don’t practice in human topiary on my offspring. Let her choose when she’s older.

His culture doesn't automatically get to dominate your culture.

If you're not happy with ear piercing until your daughter is old enough to care for them herself, that's acceptable too.

Must have had earrings in my daughter's ears when she was three months old.
I was resistant. But if I really had to do it, I would do it myself.

why on Earth would you do it yourself? Are you a trained piercer?

also, if you are thinking of doing it anyway, you clearly don't think it's that weird.

You are comparing piercing a baby's ears with FGM?! I've read some bonkers things on MN over the years and this has got to be up there.

OP of course it's up to you if you want to pierce her ears, but it's not really weird - probably best in general not to call your partner's cultural traditions 'weird' if you want harmonious relationships with them.

Your poor baby

I find it really strange ear piercings are allowed on tiny babies but I'm sure if I took my newborn to get their nose pierced or belly button pierced it wouldn't be allowed. Why are ears the exception? Because tradition?

She goes on to ask for recommendations of places to get it done. Clearly she means she’ll take her herself, not that she’ll actually do the piercing.

You think there is a chance that you'll lose your partner if you say no to having your baby's ears pierced? You're manipulated out of having boundaries by this threat? That is worrying.

What are your traditions and beliefs around children's ear piercings? Clearly not the same as your partner's family otherwise you wouldn't declare them weird. Why don't your views matter or your daughters (the fact that she is too young to express her views would be a major issue for me)?

I was resistant. But if I really had to do it, I would do it myself.
What do you mean "had to"?
Are you & your baby being held at gunpoint?

Worried about losing what OP - your partner?
If he would leave you because you do not want to inflict pain on your baby, he's not worth having.
I have a feeling you are teasing us ... but if you are not, all you need do is say "no", keep saying "no", & to tell anybody pressuring you that you will call the police if they attempt to harm your baby. Or you.

The point is that cultural traditions are not necessarily good.

Losing what? him?

Loosing him because he doesnt support you not wanting to hurt your tiny precious baby daughter?

No loss really

I am crying and laughing!
But does anyone here have any recommendations for ear piercing places?
and children's earrings?

Traditions are a bollcoks word for control.
should be fun and passive and enjoyable things, not pressure and un fun.

Read the room. Noones going to give you recommendations of where to take your baby to be hurt.

Get a back bone op otherwise you’ll have a hard and rocky road ahead of you. Just say no. You’re her mother .

Not listening are you OP?

How old are you?