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Why are women 35+ disliked so much?

231 replies

TheP0 · 13/08/2022 01:30

Hi this is not an inflammatory question. i want some perspective. Mean no offence to anyone.

society deems women over 35 as unattractive, not fertile, unwanted women, women who get no male interest etc and men most likely just like younger women cos they are hardwired for it and wont see you or want you the same way. Theres no chance for you if 35+ etc. For men it's not a problem if they 35+

How do women over 35 accept this? Is it just a fad that society promotes or is it real?

OP posts:
abovedecknotbelow · 13/08/2022 01:31

I don't and I've never come across it. What's your source?

TheP0 · 13/08/2022 01:34

abovedecknotbelow · 13/08/2022 01:31

I don't and I've never come across it. What's your source?

See men dating younger women, see it in news, social media, YouTube etc

OP posts:
xJoyfulCalmWisdomx · 13/08/2022 01:36

I'm 52 and I care a lot less about what men thinK than I did when I was younger.

Women of 40 still look young and gorgeous to me.

I think you can tell shallow men looking for a woman to boost their status. If you go for a connection more than being in the same 'league' ie, less transactional then you can avoid these shallow types.

garlicandsapphires · 13/08/2022 01:39

Terribly sweeping generalisation there.
its a tiny corner of society that believe what you’ve outlined

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/08/2022 01:41

Oh dating is one thing.

I speak at conferences and everyone listens. I work hard and lead a team. I make a proper difference in the world. I innovate in my field. And I'm a lot older than 35.

Being attractive to wankers is really not that high on my dream board.

EmmaH2022 · 13/08/2022 01:42

TheP0 · 13/08/2022 01:34

See men dating younger women, see it in news, social media, YouTube etc

Ignore that
what do you see in real life?

vodkaredbullgirl · 13/08/2022 01:45

I'm 53 and still happily single, have been for 12 years. Don't really care what men think.

IPFrealy · 13/08/2022 01:47

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/08/2022 01:41

Oh dating is one thing.

I speak at conferences and everyone listens. I work hard and lead a team. I make a proper difference in the world. I innovate in my field. And I'm a lot older than 35.

Being attractive to wankers is really not that high on my dream board.

This.

xJoyfulCalmWisdomx · 13/08/2022 01:48

Stay off OLD! I ended up getting together with somebody in real life, six years younger which didn't phase him or put him off in the slightest - and the weird thing was I had begun to think that being 47 was some sort of disability because as @MrsTerryPratchett says, I was unattractive to wankers on line!! But anyway, in real life, I think people will see YOU first and online they see your age first. Literally.

Wilburisagirl · 13/08/2022 01:56

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/08/2022 01:41

Oh dating is one thing.

I speak at conferences and everyone listens. I work hard and lead a team. I make a proper difference in the world. I innovate in my field. And I'm a lot older than 35.

Being attractive to wankers is really not that high on my dream board.

LOVE THIS.

I remember complaining to my Mum once about how I was still single and all my friends were in relationships. She said "but would you actually want to be with someone like X or Y?" I replied "god no!" It was actually quite a defining moment for me.

Dery · 13/08/2022 01:58

You’re just looking in the wrong place, OP. Am now in my 50s - I’ve been feeling increasingly confident since my mid-30s. Pretty sure my friends would say the same. Post-menopausal now and feel incredibly powerful. At work I see loads of women in their 40s and 50s, owning their career, owning their lives and looking fabulous.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 13/08/2022 02:00

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xJoyfulCalmWisdomx · 13/08/2022 02:04

yes, really agree, I've never valued myself more than I do now in my 50s, or had a stronger sense of myself. Society's supposed view of me is not the lens I see myself through. And it's common for women to feel better about themselves in their 50s I think.

If some charismatic millionaire my age can date 35 year olds I'll let him get on with it, I wasn't busy chasing him. ykwim.

Twawmyarse · 13/08/2022 02:12

Women generally become more confident and don't take any shit usually starting around that age. Lots of men don't like very confident, no shit-taking women. They prefer 'em young n dumb so they can be manipulated into the kind of partner they want. A generalisation yes, but that's the sum of it.

I wouldn't want to be with a man who thought like that anyway and there are plenty of good men out there who don't.

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 13/08/2022 02:18

I am way over 35 and none of what your saying has been my experience op, quite the opposite actually.

ofHardey · 13/08/2022 02:44

Well I'm 38 and a fucking stunner so less of the unattractive and unwanted and more of the highly fuckable ta very much

Musttryharder2021 · 13/08/2022 03:10

And those of you who think Op' opinion is ridiculous, let me guess, you've all had children in the preferable window period of 20-35?
Try OLD when you're 35+ and want to find a decent partner to settle down with

Monty27 · 13/08/2022 03:16

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londonlass71 · 13/08/2022 03:17

I'm in my 50s and my boyfriend is 39. Never been happier.

starrynight21 · 13/08/2022 03:31

I'm a hellava lot older than 35 and I've never found this to be true.

GeriSignfeld · 13/08/2022 04:45

I'm confused by your perspective & disagree with your views.

You need some idols/inspiration from the senior set, it sounds like you're either surrounding yourself with shallow people or spending too much time on Tik Tok

Have you ever heard of Iris Apfel?

runforyourdog · 13/08/2022 05:15

I'm just coming to the end of my 30's. I feel more powerful day the day. I've had a couple of years out from babies.

I do feel empowered, I love my job especially since having my kids.

bjjgirl · 13/08/2022 05:29

Personally I really enjoy aging, I am 39 and people listen to me now and take me more seriously at work (I have always looked younger and get told I look late 20s/ early 30s)
I have grown in confidence and experience and don't take any shit now, so I get more respect. Honestly people like you more when you speak the truth, you may enrage a few but they are not worth it.
My kids are older and I can focus on me more, I have never been fitter and had more of a social life.

Pruneaux · 13/08/2022 05:45

OP, I would have disagreed with you in my forties. But now in my fifties my experience is a feeling of invisibility to men my age. On OLD and IRL. I’m single (and not conventionally unattractive) but meeting someone is not a priority so I don’t care, it’s just interesting to observe.

It’s more at work I care … a lot. I feel I am dismissed as one of the older employees with fewer career progression opportunities. It’s tough to witness colleagues in their early thirties being seen as having more to contribute at work than me (and I know I am good at my work and I am well considered etc).

layladomino · 13/08/2022 07:37

I've been over 35 for a couple of decades + and have never felt this. Honestly.

I think perhaps you're trying dating and have had some horrible experiences and are now more aware and looking for the bad examples. There are many examples of women over 35 being valued. Take heart!