Ye gods it's bleak out there

[Redridinghood22]

Apologies for another OLD thread but I'm really talking myself off a ledge this morning.

Single for approx six months and OLD. Open minded about meeting someone a little different from my usual "type" and so I really try to look for the positives in someone's profile and not discount them straight away. I set myself quite a wide age-range of 10 years in either direction and a fairly wide geographical radius.

All that in mind, these appear to be the options available to me as a 30-something professional woman:

1. Scruffy men in old tshirts and shorts, often with very unkempt and wiry facial hair.
2. Grown men who constantly refer to Marvel, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings or Disney.
3. The usual cliches who presume that their favourite pizza topping, Uber rating or the fact that they "love to travel" is the most interesting thing about them.
4. Insistence on "being able to give as good as you get" or have "savage banter".
5. Stating that he'll buy the first round on a date provided "the next one's on you". How bloody unnecessary and off-putting. That's surely the point of rounds, no?
6. Moody-faced up-the-nose selfies, with their hoodies up, or photos taken in the men's urinals.
7. Mentioning sex or the devil horns emoji at every opportnity in their profile
8. Stories about how absolutely paralytic they get whilst drinking and stupid things they've done whilst under the influence.
9. Describing their perfect Sunday as recovering from a hangover, Netflix & chill.

As if I wasn't already missing my ex.

Admittedly there are valid reasons why we didn't work out but my God what I wouldn't do to have him back right now with his nice manners, normal conversation, and clean clothes 😭

I need to get off OLD don't I. I just don't know where else to meet people and don't fancy cultivating a male-dominated hobby purely for the sake of trying to meet someone...

OP, I’ve remembered that several people I’ve known have found very compatible partners through introduction agencies. I’d suggest researching some. Drawing Down the Moon was one that had a good reputation. You have to pay, but looking at people’s experience with (free?) online dating, you get what you pay for!

Don't worry ladies

I will be online dating soon

Just form an orderly line and please no fighting

My best quality....modesty

😀

Yes, but can you iron your own stuff and wash your bedding? Because if not, I'm swiping left, or is it right?

I almost forgot about the 20 year old who sent me an audio on the app of him wanking off.
He asked if it was wrong he wanted to do it again .

Errrrm .

Almost forgot

It's customary to do a good cock picture when online dating

Where are my manners I Almost forgot 😁

@SpentTooLongOnUsername I honestly thought you were listing all the ridiculous things that people put in their profiles! I thought you were joking. I didn't realise that is actually your profile

It's all a bit what you think women want to hear. But what do I know? Been single for many years and gave up with OLD for the same reasons others have given and more.

@SpentTooLongOnUsername

Its usually considered bad form to hijack another persons thread and make it all about you.

You sound like you are hoping one of these ladies here will PM you because they can’t resist your ironing skills.

As I said before. Men. They are not sending their best.

@SpentTooLongOnUsername

To be fair, you made several references to sex, kissing, hand-holding, the state of your flowery bedsheets, exploring women's bodies, and all the references to your impeccable hygiene makes me think you probably smell. And I read every single line of your profile, and no, I wouldn't touch you with a bargepole. You scream of being a Nice Guy.

Alas I wash and iron all my kids clothes as well

As well as cooking and the cleaning

Think a lot of single parents do,

@SpentTooLongOnUsername

If you don’t know what a Nice Guy is, look it up. It’s not complimentary.

As I said previously, you explicitly mention sex twice , you also referencing exploring a woman’s body and I’m guessing you’re not operating an MRI machine. You also mention kissing, hands, bed , sheets…

the picture you paint is very clear… and when you need to tell people you’re a “nice guy”.

Off topic, but:
3 hour meal!?
THREE HOUR MEAL??

OP are you okay? Just saying hi!

You obviously haven't been stalking MN for long enough to realise that it's a viper's nest... seriously, now you sound like you're about to call us all bitches and tell us we'll never meet a man as great as you. Your profile is creepy... we tried to help. We gave you the benefit of the doubt. Now look where we are. Again.

Oh my goodness OP...I completely hear you! I have no answer...but it's no different when you reach my grand old age (mid-50s). You'd think that men would have grown up a little by the time they reach 50...but in my OLD experiences, the opposite seems to be true, sadly. It's actually scary how awful the choice is...as a strong, educated, professional woman, my 'choices' appear to be toothless, tattooed, badly-ageing men in baseball caps and hoodies, sporting bizarrely unkempt facial hair and several gold chains/earrings.
Their opening gambits consist of:
a) hey,
b) hi gorgeous/babe/sexy (words are interchangeable but equally irritating!!)
c) wanna swop pics (their spelling error, just to be clear!🤣) or
d) (my latest nugget!!) 🔥 wanna have some fun? (No...I really don't! 🤮)

You'll be surprised to hear, that I don't respond 🤣

IMO - OLD is dead in the water. Since Guardian Soulmates (and that wasn't great, but at least there was an inherent filtering system going on) went under, I just wouldn't bother with the other market places.

Change your approach to what/who is around you. We go through life not realising people might be interested in us - if they had a sign we might be interested in them. Use your eyes. Doesn't have to be sexual - just let them know you have noticed them. Take a risk and ask people out, or let them know you like them - so what if they say no or give you the brush off. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Can't be worse than the crap we go through on OLD.

I'm 60 - been there done it all. If I meet anyone now it's not going to be on OLD.

Take the stuff about sex out, makes you seem like a creep.

And the bedsheets.

I already told you. Lots of us told you. In response you called us all venomous! Scroll back and you'll see.