Wife going to see Dreamboys

[Anothersatellite]

I know, I know, the boys are at the mild end of things. So when my wife told me she had accepted an invitation to go to a major city theatre to see them in all their business, I was blindsided, and I didn't know why. A few days later and I still didn't. Was it insecurity? Don't think so but open to that idea. Jealous. Ditto. It's the strangest brew of feelings that I can't nail down. One day it's I couldn't give a damn. The next day, over my dead body. She's not that keen herself, more looking forward to dinner/shopping/cocktails with friends before the Henboys bearpit of severalhundredwomenbehavingbaďly. This is way short of a dealbreaker. I have never felt the need to hand out my permission for anything, but then again she goes to see Motown tributes/dinner/shopping with friends, so this has no precedent in our 11 years together.
What I'd like, is advice on what to say to her when she gets picked up by car from our home on the day. I don't want to say anything remotely snarky, or make her feel like she's going to be dragging a ball and chain around. I'm not going to be at home slamming doors and being an arse. I love her and I've never wanted to issue ultimatums. I am not that man.

@Nanny0gg I did make myself clearer in a second post. OP can't really stop his wife from going but can make up his own mind as to whether it changes how he sees their relationship.

She can go if she wants to, just as any man can. And he can decide how he reacts, as any woman can.

Which is why I said tell her how you feel and deal with whatever happens.

No double standards, just an adult way of dealing with it.

yeah it’s alot more full on when men are stripping, just as a heads up normally when I a guy goes to a strip club if he touches he gets chucked out, when a women goes to a strip club it’s encouraged to touch, the male strippers will put a cloth around the girls head when she’s on her knees & his naked body, guys will put the girls hands down their trousers & that’s crossing the line for me!

if it was the same rules as going to a female strip club id sat go for it … but there’s a small chance more happens with men & that’s not on IMO

becuase of the ‘power embalance’ as you put it

You couldn’t be more wrong!, a man is chucke
out if he touches where as women are encouraged to touch!, it’s far more grotty for
women then it is for men!

Wrong this happens at dream boys more so then in a normal club, women are encouraged to touch and pvt dances offered

in a female strip club if the guy asks for extras he’s quickly chucked out

Don’t know where you live but where I am and in most places from what I understand men are required by law to keep at least g string on whilst women are allowed to strip completely
this double standard had been explained by saying mens gentialia is external whilst womens is not
Complete utter crap designed to continue the double standards
Are you a man or woman and which strip shows ( male / female) have you actually seen ?

Plenty of strip shows have sex services offered also backstage
again , what is your gender and actual experience
you are saying a lot of things that are blatantly wrong imo

@UNK22

name one male strip show where men strip to NOTHING ?

Same hear. It's pretty grim, and I'd be upfront about my views on it.

OP, if you feel uncomfortable about it, just tell her that. You don't have to lay the law down and say she can't go, but letting her know you are feeling unsure about it is absolutely fine.

I wouldn't want to go to one of these in a million years. But if for some insane reason I was due to go to one and my dp expressed he wasn't feeling totally happy about it i'd cancel in an instant. because his feelings about it would be totally valid given what it is, and they would totally trump my mates needs to go see naked men prance about a stage.

When I was in my early 20's I went to see a male stripper show. I was bored out of my skull and just appalled at the amount of money being thrust at them that was going on. I've never been to another one. I wouldn't worry.

@Anothersatellite I wouldn’t be happy about my DP going to a strip show. The one in question does have full nudity (subject to the license of the venue allowing it), and PPs have said that audience members are allowed on stage, so there is a possibility of your DP having a penis waved in her face, dry humped, whatever. There is a power imbalance, and in the case of male strippers, being, presumably, strong young men the power is in many ways on their side, at least as physically.
It does seem that the format is a little tamer or more controlled than a more informal stripping situation, but to what degree, who knows?
It mostly depends on your relationship with your DP and whether this is a hill you think it’s worth dying on. It would be a hell of a drama if she declined going; her friends would label you a controlling prick, and/or label her a frump. But then, stripping is not in any part of my cultural repertoire, I’d be wondering about the tacky dickhead friend of my DP who thought this was a good idea.

@UNK22 why revive this ZOMBIE THREAD? Were you googling male strippers? 😂

Allow me; DreamBoys

Oh godammit, sucked into a necrothread!

I don’t think it’s the same as a strip club in that I think many women are exploited and even trafficked in these places without any real regulations (just depends on the ethos of the owner) and dream boys is a huge production and they are well paid, well protected and taken care of. There are very little risks to the men performing.

I actually don’t like these things either, seeing men throw women around simulating sex positions and flap genitals in their face is really aggressive whenever I have been to one of those hen type do’s with a stripper like it’s actually been still a little degrading to women! I don’t think DB’s will be like that though it’s more well managed. I think just say have a nice time to her. I honestly don’t know if women get genuinely turned on by these things or whether it’s just meant to be a slightly debauched fun night out with their mates.

Lol …. That’s good to hear
the laws here are still as I described but seems where you are they have changed which is a goid thing
as far as what others said , yeah I don’t see that dream boys would be in danger or have safety risks . It’s not the same thing at all simply because we live in a world where women are frequently abused sexually , raped and murdered . There’s an absolutely power imbalance simply because we live in a patriarchy and one where women are thousands of times more likely to be hurt ….
but…. Didn’t realise it was a zombie thread . Will leave it to hopefully fade away

Mostly women just scream with laughter at these events, not remotely interested in anything buff, mainly just enjoying fun with their mates, utterly harmless and a bit cringy.

mainly...

I’m in the UK where there is no requirement to just go down to a g-string, as is for dream boys Uk & U.S they go fully naked

ive seen from ‘classy’ shows (burlesque) to grotty shows it’s part of my job…. Dream boys is far from classy due to the personnel interaction with the audience, there is interaction with burlesque but it’s with 1-2 audience members, no lap dances in the audience & the women do keep their lingerie on,I came across this thread due to the double standard more women cheat on hen/bachelorette nights then men do on stag nights with strippers.

a little Google on this & it will open your eyes, I’m not sure why so many women cheat but no doubt if the men could touch like the women can more men would cheat, when you get a group of women on a hen they also encourage each other to touch, suck, lick

the whole ‘have a good night dear’ wouldn’t wash if it was a man going & if any man reads this let her know your ‘limits’ before she goes.

😂😂😂 nah, I think someone answered dream boys, but most do magic Mike may not but idk

this has nothing to do with the thread, hopefully your zombie answer will die away 😂

Got this all wrong. I was wondering what the problem was with a musical theatre show about Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons.

The fact that female and male strip shows are completely different had everything to do with this thread and a whole lot more to do with it than your insecurities about women and them enjoying hot naked men . Luckily, despite the continued inequalities we do now live in a world where men can no longer dictate what we can and can’t say 😂

You demonstrate my point very well .

Oh get off the grass next you’ll be trying to convince people more women use sex workers than men