Wife going to see Dreamboys

[Anothersatellite]

I know, I know, the boys are at the mild end of things. So when my wife told me she had accepted an invitation to go to a major city theatre to see them in all their business, I was blindsided, and I didn't know why. A few days later and I still didn't. Was it insecurity? Don't think so but open to that idea. Jealous. Ditto. It's the strangest brew of feelings that I can't nail down. One day it's I couldn't give a damn. The next day, over my dead body. She's not that keen herself, more looking forward to dinner/shopping/cocktails with friends before the Henboys bearpit of severalhundredwomenbehavingbaďly. This is way short of a dealbreaker. I have never felt the need to hand out my permission for anything, but then again she goes to see Motown tributes/dinner/shopping with friends, so this has no precedent in our 11 years together.
What I'd like, is advice on what to say to her when she gets picked up by car from our home on the day. I don't want to say anything remotely snarky, or make her feel like she's going to be dragging a ball and chain around. I'm not going to be at home slamming doors and being an arse. I love her and I've never wanted to issue ultimatums. I am not that man.

What I'd like, is advice on what to say to her when she gets picked up by car from our home on the day. I don't want to say anything remotely snarky, or make her feel like she's going to be dragging a ball and chain around. I'm not going to be at home slamming doors and being an arse. I love her and I've never wanted to issue ultimatums. I am not that man.

Then why say anything other than ‘Bye; see you later!’?

I think the correct comparison would be a burlesque show or a Paris cabaret/can can

All three of those have been on mainstream tv (I have seen all three on this morning and league of their own etc)

It is very much a theatre performance with no personal interaction at all

@Anothersatellite you've never felt the need to hand out permission ?
That's good because she doesn't need your permission to do anything.

The vast majority of women don’t find those types of shows erotic, it’s all very tongue in cheek, very different to a lap dancing club. If you’re not comfortable with it tell her otherwise just tell her goodby have a good evening?

It won't be how you imagine it, it's all greasy men trying to be sexy. It's anything but. Tell her to have a good time and make her a cuppa when she gets home.

I wouldn't be mad on my dh seeing a load of female strippers so I don't want to come across unsympathetic or having double standards but, it does seem (from my experience) that straight men seem to get something more out of seeing attractive women strip, than straight women seem to get out of seeing attractive men strip. I've seen male strip shows and it is quite cringe and definitely more of a adult pantomime vibe than a sexy vibe. I can 100% believe your wife when she says she's looking forward to the catch up and cocktails over the show. That's exactly how I'd be.

Well this thread is an eye opener. I thought it was a musical...

If this was a woman saying this about her partner going to a strip club everyone would be saying these are boundaries you're entitled to have and not be happy about.

@drpet49

No different to a man going to a strip club

It's very different. From what I know about strip clubs there is full frontal nudity and private dances (which may include 'extras') are offered. There is none of that at a dreamboys show.

I saw The Dreamboys on a hen night a few years back. It was fine. A bit tacky yes. Very amusing. Nice to admire the male form in all its glory - there are very few opportunities for this so it's good to redress the balance somewhat. There was some interaction with the audience and some audience members volunteered to go on the stage.
I agree that it's more like a burlesque show though as there wasn't the option of personal dances etc .... or at least I wasn't aware there was!

There is full frontal nudity at a Dreamboys show.

But female strippers are different- well the clubs are. Private dances etc.
Men who go to strip clubs usually find naked women erotic.
I had the misfortune to go to one of those things like Dreamboys 26 years ago for a friend’s 21st. I was dating her brother (and despised him so it lasted a month) so felt obliged. I was soooo bored. I drank as much as I could afford. I had to rescue said friend when she danced with one oily stripper (at the end they had a let’s all dance together thing), she broke her heel of her shoe, fell backwards and oily gross man fell on top of her.
So there was a comedy aspect to it.
Erotic. No.

So would women be happy for their husbands to dance with naked women and have one of them fall on him

It's not different at all. It's objectification and if men do it they are filth and hate women and feel entitled to buy their bodies

@oviraptor21

There is full frontal nudity at a Dreamboys show.

Oh sorry I didn't know

@MrMrsJones

Talk about double standards

Men going to a lap club having a lapdance = LTB

Women doing to same = get over it

Bollocks, it just as bad 👎

Tell her you have booked a night out at the local strip club see what she says

Exactly.

Depressingly familiar MN double standards. As always.

@SamphirethePogoingStickerist

"Have a nice time dear" as she leaves.

When she comes home ask her how it was. DSis went and phoned me when she got home. She desperately needed someone not snigger with and didn't want to annoy her lovely mate and colleagues who thought it was brilliant.

Just pack away your manly pride, shelve the ego. She will either enjoy it or she won't. Nothing you can do to say will change that.

That wouldn't be the attitude on here if the OP was going to a strip club. Although I highly doubt the men in this case will be treated exploited the way female strippers are

OMG for the last time they are completely different experiences.

Seriously. Absolutely no point comparing the two.

@CuntAmongstThePigeons

OMG for the last time they are completely different experiences.

Seriously. Absolutely no point comparing the two.

What a load of bollocks

@drpet49

No different to a man going to a strip club

It is, it’s completely different.

Well considering I've worked in strip clubs for over a decade and spend my spare time at burlesque and other drag or theatre shows like dream boys that include nudity I can confidently say they are indeed completely different.

What is your experience?

What double standards @Libertaire?

@drpet49

No different to a man going to a strip club

Which most women would have a BIG problem with by the way and certainly wouldn’t advise someone to say ‘have a nice time dear’ if their partner goes to see a strip show.

Do they take all their clothes off at burlesque shows?

Burlesque shows are generally teeny tiny thongs, or sometimes no thongs but fake bushes, or Merkins.