What could I text after being ghosted?

[TeaMilkAnd2Sugars]

..after having sex.

I know the advice is usually not to bother sending anything and I tend to agree but I've known this person for many years and I thought we had a mutual respect for one another so I'm quite hurt by the disrespect.

FWIW I don't even want a reply from him now, but I do want to pull him up on being so rude and make sure he knows not to bother me again in the future.

If you do sign up to OLD, please make sure you follow lalalaletmeexplain on Instagram and buy her book. Great advice on there.

@Bangheadhere40

Seriously, this behaviour that he has displayed makes me really bloody mad! They are all like this, what a load of crap, you deserve basic respect.

Just tell him no hard feelings and you understand he's 'busy', you only wanted casual but you need someone reliable and consistent so you have gone elsewhere.

Really pisses me off! Whatever happened to common decency no matter what the situation.

"gone elsewhere"? That sounds like a car being serviced. Saying that makes the OP sound as if she needs a regular service. I wouldn't say that!

I already follow lalalaletmeexplain on Instagram, I don't keep up with stories much though. I'll have a look through her stuff.

Saying that makes the OP sound as if she needs a regular service

That did make me laugh

I've been going over the evening and wondering whether I said or did something in particular that put him off.

Yes, you had sex with him - and then he was no longer interested. This story is as old as time itself and many men lose interest and do not respect women who are happy to get their clothes off straight away. It's terrible but it's true.

From your previous posts it seems that you haven't been in touch with each other for a long time -- so he was probably happy to get a shag out of it and would probably come back for more at some point in the future. You seem to be more emotionally invested in him based on your past.

I think you should give yourself a few days to get over it (and don't be so quick to get your clothes off in the future )

@LightSpeeds

I've been going over the evening and wondering whether I said or did something in particular that put him off.

Yes, you had sex with him - and then he was no longer interested. This story is as old as time itself and many men lose interest and do not respect women who are happy to get their clothes off straight away. It's terrible but it's true.

From your previous posts it seems that you haven't been in touch with each other for a long time -- so he was probably happy to get a shag out of it and would probably come back for more at some point in the future. You seem to be more emotionally invested in him based on your past.

I think you should give yourself a few days to get over it (and don't be so quick to get your clothes off in the future )

Good grief Get your clothes off whenever you fancy OP, as long as you know what your expectations are you will be fine.

Just text UNSUBSCRIBE

Bloody hell
Has Jermaine Stewart entered the thread?

To be honest when we had our first date years ago we did spend the night together then and he wasn't at all put off by me putting out, it was the start of a 1.5 year relationship with him doing all of the pursuing after the first night.

Feelings change of course and its been a long time since we were together so perhaps he just doesn't see me as dating material these days. It's his loss, I think I'm lovely

@theyhavenothingbuttheaudacity

Bloody hell Has Jermaine Stewart entered the thread?

I had to Google Jermaine Stewart to get this. Good one!

Just had to Google Jermain Stewart. Was expecting a nun or Mary Whitehouse type!

Do what you like with your clothes OP. Have the sex.

Lol showing my age!
Don't do it again girls just have some cherry wine

@theyhavenothingbuttheaudacity

Bloody hell Has Jermaine Stewart entered the thread?

That's given me the first laugh of the day after having surgery this morning!

@ImJustMadAboutSaffron don't laugh too hard look after yourself
Keep those clothes on too you don't want to catch a chill lovely

I've been binge watching lalalaletmeexplain's Instagram highlight reels, she knows her shit doesn't she!

I might go and buy her book on kindle.

Oh do! It's just really important I think to finally be reading this perspective and to be honest, as a parent I feel it's important to know what kind of dating world my children are entering too. Because it's vastly different now.

Also check out Holistic Psychologist- also on Insta. Really great content, about our attachment styles, why we approach relationships like we do etc and healing.

I don't know about you, but I'm really open to having a completely different kind of relationship now that I'm separated. I guess when I met my ex it was all about the classic trajectory of house, marriage, kids. Now I'm happy as my own complete person, when I want a relationship it has to be an add on, not the missing piece. And not stress me out!

Side note: easier said than done

Don’t understand why you even bothered to reply to his text a week after the shag fishing for a weekend shag!

Leading to his ‘blah blah busy blah won’t offer you much at all blah’ blethering message. Pointless.

Ignore!

Also following the holistic psychologist now and reading about the different attachment styles - thank you for these recommendations they're great accounts!

Don’t understand why you even bothered to reply to his text a week after the shag fishing for a weekend shag!

The need to be heard, basically. I didn't want him thinking I was OK with it. I felt disrespected and wanted him to know that.

He has text again today asking how my day is going

Ignore!

Fair enough you wanted to communicate your annoyance: you’ve done that!