My AirPods are where I thought they were. My husband isn’t!!

[BadDayForMe]

I’ve been reading mumsnet for years but not made an account until now. I can’t talk to anyone in RL and really need some advice please
My DH is on a golfing trip with a work friend in Portugal. I though I would do some housework today and was looking for my AirPods. I couldn’t find them so mentioned to DS that I didn’t want to spend time looking in case I’d left them at work.
He suggested I look on find my iPhone as that would show them. I’ve never used it before but once I reset the Apple ID I got in and saw they were in the house. ( I searched the kitchen and found them behind the pot I drop my keys and stuff in. )
I noticed that this app showed my husbands phone so clicked on it just for a nose
He’s not in Portugal. He’s in Spain!!!!!
Why the fuck would he lie about what country he he’s in unless there is something seriously dodgy going on. I watched him go from a hotel to a
Restaurant, then along the seafront, then back to the same hotel. It can’t be wrong. I can’t sleep. Is he with another woman?
Wtf do I do?????

@Shinyandnew1

I’d FaceTime him to say hi.

Yea. This too.

What emergency would I need to have his flight and hotel details. Should I also always know what train he's on, where in the country he is for work that day?

Bloody hell. He's a lying twat whichever way this goes. So sorry, op.

@WonderfulYou of course checking the tracker will give her all the evidence she needs. It tells her which hotel he’s actually in. Then if he goes to a golf course in Spain or not, and then which airport he travels to to fly back from, when he’s told her specifically which one. She then knows if he’s lying or not about where he went and used the Portugal trip as a cover. She can then go to the airport at the correct time for the flight he is actually getting and see if he comes out with the other woman.

@Silverclocks

But there are a dozen ways OP could contact DH directly in an emergency and very few ways he could actually help while he's in Portugal/Spain

Ah well there you have my anxiety around plane crashes, terrorism and natural diasters all of which would potentially separate someone from their phone and I think its always best to be over prepared.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's hard to imagine how there might be an innocent explanation.

He's using a mobile vpn which routes through Spain is my guess.

@toomanychickens

I would've texted him and said why are you in Spain and not Portugal? I don't understand why you don't ask him now rather than wait until he returns.

Bad advice. It lets him know you know and let’s him have time to come up with an explanation. Asking him face to face in a few days when he gets back let’s you judge his reaction and he hasn’t got thinking time. Tell the OP to text just for people to read the drama on MN isn’t helpful to real life.

Oh op I'm so sorry, this must be driving you mad. I hope you get the answers soon x

@Mysterioso

He's using a mobile vpn which routes through Spain is my guess.

This is a distinct possibility

@HarlanPepper

This is such a blindingly obvious crock of shit that it's practically visible from space.

Do you mean the OP or his responses?

[quote GoFishandChips]@Silverclocks

But there are a dozen ways OP could contact DH directly in an emergency and very few ways he could actually help while he's in Portugal/Spain

Ah well there you have my anxiety around plane crashes, terrorism and natural diasters all of which would potentially separate someone from their phone and I think its always best to be over prepared.[/quote]
If he's on the crashed plane you'd know soon enough and if he isn't his phone is still good. Nothing changes because you have the flight number.

@Mysterioso

He's using a mobile vpn which routes through Spain is my guess.

Nope. That wouldn’t show him walking from the Spanish hotel to the beach and back!

@toomanychickens

I would've texted him and said why are you in Spain and not Portugal? I don't understand why you don't ask him now rather than wait until he returns.

Because if you're going to catch someone out you don't give them all the time and space in the world to come up with a story and get rid of any potential evidence.

You confront them when they're home. In front of you. And see how their facial expressions change.

I'm not sure why people don't seem to understand this. I wouldn't face time now either. Seems a bit random this time of day and so close to his return

Could he be using a vpn? They are all over the place

I hope that your friend supports you. What a lying arsehole.

@MuchuseasaChocolateTeapot

Could he be using a vpn? They are all over the place

They wouldn’t show his phone moving around a different location.

Oh sorry, @DiamondCushion you’re right

I would phone the hotel he is staying at to see if he is a registered guest.

@Silverclocks I think we might be in danger of derailing the thread but personally I'd rather know sooner than later. I also had the horrible task of informing my father that his father was dead, he was out of the county and lost his phone and I didn't know the hotel he was staying at. Yes nothing changed by the delay but it wasn't a nice position for me to be in waiting to let him know, especially as other family were wanting to speak with him.

I do see your point but personally I think it's better and doesn't cause harm to have all the details.

But why Spain rather than somewhere completely different, if he's having an affair? Why not just Portugal for simplicity?? Bizarre.

I’m very sorry OP. Even if it’s all innocent you’ve had a dreadful gut wrenching time. It’s the worst feeling and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone

Your update OP makes it sound so fishy. I think your DH sadly was up to something and didn’t count on your son having tech for your air pods using find my phone. Work trip my arse.

You've had good advice. Sending love. You must feel so sick.

.