If your parter was bisexual would it bother you?

[RedRobyn2021]

I'm watching the love is blind on Netflix and one of the people participating has been with both men and women, but has decided he wants to be with a woman and has gone on the show

Anyway it got me thinking and would a man being bisexual put you off him?

I used to have a boyfriend who I knew had kissed other men when drunk a few times

He was AMAZING in bed, absolutely gorgeous and I fell in love with him quickly, it never even occurred to me to be bothered that he'd kissed men. Although he hadn't had sex with a man as far as he told me, so perhaps that different?

Interested to hear others thoughts

@MonkeyPuddle I totally hear what you’re saying. That insecurity can be a massive issue.

These threads always result in people thinking unless your comfortable with it yabu- I wouldn’t be comfortable with it, I am only attracted to men who fancy woman, end of. I don’t need to explain or justify it.

That was to @DoreenBoland with all due respect I really don't think certain questions need detailed answers. Just no!!

DH is bi and it it's never put me off him! We're monogamous, we're happy. I remember the episode you're referring to and it struck me how insecure Diamond came across as because of her reaction. All relationships need to be founded on trust, and if Carlton's dating history immediately made her think he couldn't commit, it says more about Diamond than him!

Tbh this is a threat asking for peoples personal opinion so @DoreenBoland is just curious about peoples opinions....which is the whole point of this thread

*thread

@OnlyFoolsnMothers, of course you don’t have to justify yourself. I admire people who actually just say they don’t like bisexuals, rather than attempt some convoluted explanation.

@FuckThatBullshit

That was to *@DoreenBoland* with all due respect I really don't think certain questions need detailed answers. Just no!!

Absolutely. I’m sorry if I’ve been rude. I’m fascinated by people and I’m being nosy. I’m sorry.

I promise I don’t think anyone is being unreasonable. If you search my name, you’ll see I’m being pretty unreasonable and a liar myself right now.

How do people know they are only attracted to heterosexuals? That is surely assuming that the person had honestly disclosed their sexual preference.

When would you expect this would be disclosed? On the first date? When you first catch their eye in a bar or at running club? This surely assumes that you inherently can recognise that someone is straight at first glance ..

@DoreenBoland I’m just not sexually attracted to men who are attracted to men. Also men who enjoy rough sex, water sports, sex with sex workers, sex with people they met on tinder an hour ago, lots of partners, anal sex... I just have preferences.
Those men can all be liked & loved by me in other capacities but cannot be my lover.
It’s not Psychology I’d make any attempt to unpack ether because I don’t care for the reasons why. This is my body & I’ll do what I want with it. My vagina isn’t party to any political agenda & I don’t have to use it to prove my social decency.

You can’t police attraction or make accusations of prejudice because people won’t have sex with people they don’t want to have sex with.
Lots of people fetishise certain races. Have a ‘thing’ for black men etc but actually they’re racist. My mother for example. Black men, black babies but racist.

It wouldn't bother me that he found both men and women attractive but infidelity would bother me no matter who it was with.

I have dated bisexual men but I wouldn't want to settle down with one.

[quote DoreenBoland]@OnlyFoolsnMothers, of course you don’t have to justify yourself. I admire people who actually just say they don’t like bisexuals, rather than attempt some convoluted explanation.[/quote]
You said earlier...
I’m sorry if I come across as goady, I promise I’m not.

I'd say the above post is quite goady really.

[quote DoreenBoland]@OnlyFoolsnMothers, of course you don’t have to justify yourself. I admire people who actually just say they don’t like bisexuals, rather than attempt some convoluted explanation.[/quote]
She didn't say that she didn't like bisexuals. She said she only wanted to be in a relationship with a man who is attracted to women.

My honest truth is that I'd worry that a bisexual would crave something that I couldn't provide, my physicality may not satisfy them and therefore lead to dissatisfaction. Yes, there would be men who will crave other women but if someone Is intrinsically wired to want something that I couldn't provide I wouldn't like it as it could lead to insecurity.

Yes, I apologise again. I was clumsy with my wording and I see that it came across badly.

@AlternativePerspective I also refuse to be referred to as cis. I did not say you were biphobic for being attracted to bisexual men. I said that people who dismiss bisexual partners due to the idea they are more promiscuous are biphobic.

@Sorehandsandfeet

My honest truth is that I'd worry that a bisexual would crave something that I couldn't provide, my physicality may not satisfy them and therefore lead to dissatisfaction. Yes, there would be men who will crave other women but if someone Is intrinsically wired to want something that I couldn't provide I wouldn't like it as it could lead to insecurity.

This is exactly what I was thinking. A bisexual man might want something I just don't have and can't provide. I'm not saying they'd cheat but I'd always feel that I wasn't enough. I can't imagine anyone complaining if a gay man didn't want to be with a bisexual man. The gay people I know can't even look at a vulva without being visibly repulsed...

@Wazzzzzuuuuuuup

How do people know they are only attracted to heterosexuals? That is surely assuming that the person had honestly disclosed their sexual preference.

When would you expect this would be disclosed? On the first date? When you first catch their eye in a bar or at running club? This surely assumes that you inherently can recognise that someone is straight at first glance ..

You don’t need to know right away. The basic attraction can be there but additional information can change that. I’ve found bisexual women extremely attractive, I’ve found straight women extremely attractive, but when you find out additional information you review that, just like with learning anything about a person.

@Sorehandsandfeet obviously I can’t speak for all bi people. But for me at least, I am happy with whoever I am in a relationship. If I’m in a relationship with a man I don’t crave a woman or vice versa. It just doesn’t enter my brain.
I’m sure there are dickheads of both sexes and various sexualities who would use it as an excuse to sow wild oats.

I guess what I’m trying to understand is, aside from the ick that your man might fancy another man, what’s so off putting? But I totally get that it’s not something that can be explained.

No one should have to justify, explain or rationalise why they don't want to have sex with another person. Hth.

I genuinely don't know how I feel about it.
I also really struggle with people always having to identify themselves.

I was married to a man, had children and divorced

My wife also married a man had children and divorced.

I had only been in relationships with men as had my wife.

We were friends at work for a decade. Now we are married. There was no cheating. No feeling for anyone but the people we had married/dated and then each other.

I never know what to put on a form. Am I gay/lesbian/bi or do I just love the person I'm with.

If our marriage failed then I don't have a clue what I would put into the online dating info.

I loved my husband. I love my wife.

@Comedycook

No one should have to justify, explain or rationalise why they don't want to have sex with another person. Hth.

It really does. Thank you.