Dating thread 225: Roses are red, violets are blue

[ButterflyOfShay]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

ButterflyOfShay

If you’d gone out when ovulating I bet you’d have fancied someone there !?

Maybe a walk and one of your local crush today?

I have no idea why I like him so much . It’s weird and a chemistry 🧪 thing and he clearly has same
My date sat was adorable , funny in my wavelength but when we kissed I just didn’t feel it

😂😂 haha no it was dire on the men front @Thisisworsethananticpated. The band wasn’t all that either 😴. We left before the end!
Well it’s great to be having that chemistry and spark with someone.. makes you feel so alive don't it?? I so miss that. Shame about your non sparky date but still nice to get out and meet new people hey 🙂

ButterflyOfShay
You’ve nailed it
I’m defo more Sparky today and it helps me cope with what’s ahead of me this week , all draining

I know he’s really into me , that’s not in question

I just need to manage my emotions better and not get psycho obsessed and have him in the right compartment , Which needs to be a 20% one
Not a 99% one xx

And thanks
I don’t know about you lot but I can’t talk about this much in RL
Friends are married and l/ or single but want more romance
I feel less judged as there is always someone obsessed about someone on here and im like

Phew ! It’s not just me

@Thisisworsethananticpated

ButterflyOfShay You’ve nailed it I’m defo more Sparky today and it helps me cope with what’s ahead of me this week , all draining

I know he’s really into me , that’s not in question

I just need to manage my emotions better and not get psycho obsessed and have him in the right compartment , Which needs to be a 20% one
Not a 99% one xx

This is the million dollar question though isn’t it - is it ever a voluntary thing, to be able to put someone in the 20% box rather than the 99% one?

Sessions with my therapist suggest by my choosing to pursue things with men who say from the outset they’re not REALLLLLY capable of giving me more than xyz I am replaying a loop of activity which is about confirming to myself that I’m not quite good enough. Question - is the feeling of intense chemistry partly an addictive response?… it’s the thrilling upward trajectory of a rollercoaster that always hurtles downwards after a while..

ibelieveinmirrorballs
Interesting point
I mean everything you say
I start therapy this week
I’ve covered a lot but my relationships with men has never come up as had bigger fish to fry

So for today here’s to 20% motherfuxker 😁

@30somethingandstillsingle I agree with what others have said. He obvs wants you now others are involved, but be careful.

ugh I met someone I thought I liked a few weeks ago..but we've met 3 times, dtd and he keeps mentioning giving my other DC a sibling, and asking what I'd do if I go pregnant now..he also keeps asking if I'm his girlfriend. I just feel its a bit soon and has given me the ick.. He's a nice guy, and very generous but red flags...I was in an abusive relationship so have to take things slowly.

Have a few other irons but I guess I need to decide if I tell this guy its a no go

@Notanotherchange

ugh I met someone I thought I liked a few weeks ago..but we've met 3 times, dtd and he keeps mentioning giving my other DC a sibling, and asking what I'd do if I go pregnant now..he also keeps asking if I'm his girlfriend. I just feel its a bit soon and has given me the ick.. He's a nice guy, and very generous but red flags...I was in an abusive relationship so have to take things slowly.

Have a few other irons but I guess I need to decide if I tell this guy its a no go

@Notanotherchange I would be wary of this too. Maybe having a frank talk with him would be the way to go?

@ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers perhaps, but I'm not sure if its already too late for that. As I just feel a bit weird about him now.

But also wondering if is me finding issues, as I never like emotionally available men!

[quote Notanotherchange]@ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers perhaps, but I'm not sure if its already too late for that. As I just feel a bit weird about him now.

But also wondering if is me finding issues, as I never like emotionally available men![/quote]
@Notanotherchange I fully understand why you feel weird. I would too. Perhaps you just need a bit of time to re access things?

@Notanotherchange sorry, pressed send too quickly then. My apologies.

If after you've given yourself a bit of time, and decide if it's too much, then I would look at ending things with him. ❤️

And be kind to yourself as well. You're definitely not finding issues from where I'm standing 🙂

@ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers that sounds weird as fuck and I’m not surprised you’ve got the ick definitely don’t think you’re finding issues!

@ihavetogoshoppingnow you've tagged the wrong person. It's @Notanotherchange who's having issues. 😂

Notanotherchange
Give yourself permission to feel the ick
Please
Abusive relationship or not….
That’s super weird anyway
Wanting to impregnate so fast

@Thisisworsethananticpated

Notanotherchange Give yourself permission to feel the ick Please Abusive relationship or not…. That’s super weird anyway Wanting to impregnate so fast

@Thisisworsethananticpated I completely agree with you 👍🏻

Hi Onwards!

@Thisisworsethananticpated I’m just the same as you. When someone gets in my head I think about them all the time!! Im sure that’s really normal and is the same with nearly everyone 🙂
Not met anyone who’s got into my head like that in SUCH a long time!!

Though he must have read your post earlier as saw MrTurk at lunch! He looks ridiculously good looking in his Timberlands and fresh haircut 😍 man… he is FIT. 😜

@Notanotherchange I couldn’t imagine anything more offputting 🤢 well I could but a guy having that attitude and sending out that message is there with the worst of them 🤮

Drat, my cover has been blown. Hi all 👋

Quick question if I may.
Miss horse has invited me over to hers on Friday, she will be cooking, not sure if sex will be on the cards or not, but do I go ‘equipped’, with condoms just in case, or is that a bit premature?

She did say the her daughter was going to be away for the weekend, but will only be date 3 really

HowlongWillThisTakeNow
Oh my sweet innocent
She asking you for a shag
‘At home
Kids away ….
Pack condoms

@HowlongWillThisTakeNow defo go prepared!

@HowlongWillThisTakeNow I would definitely go prepared 😊