Dating thread 225: Roses are red, violets are blue

[ButterflyOfShay]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@Thisisworsethananticpated I think you are doing the right thing

@Stepcount Glad you managed a few lovely hours. Sometimes deep discussions are needed.
Will his sister moving in hinder you going to his place?
Its good there is a date for his scan so he knows where he is at.

He’s sent a good morning so I’m gearing myself for ‘the chat’
Sorry I can’t tell people in RL the mental dramas of My dating 🧠

My location change is certainly giving me a lot more choice numbers wise. After finer sifting though there are still only a couple I'd like to chat with, obviously those ones haven't replied 🙂

Bangheadhere40

Give it time ! It’s such a weird time consuming process

@Thisisworsethananticpated

He’s sent a good morning so I’m gearing myself for ‘the chat’ Sorry I can’t tell people in RL the mental dramas of My dating 🧠

I hope the chat goes well! Let us know.

@Bangheadhere40

My location change is certainly giving me a lot more choice numbers wise. After finer sifting though there are still only a couple I'd like to chat with, obviously those ones haven't replied 🙂

Hope you get some replies soon :)

@Bangheadhere40

My location change is certainly giving me a lot more choice numbers wise. After finer sifting though there are still only a couple I'd like to chat with, obviously those ones haven't replied 🙂

Always the way

Daydreamscometrue
Yeah he’s definitely in a funny place with his family and hostile ex and a bereavement
He says he wants to see me , but actions speak louder than words
I don’t think he’s in a headspace
And there was me thinking sex would cheer us up
!
I’m going to back off , he’s a sweetheart actually but I need dating to distract from my worries
Wishful thinking ?

@Thisisworsethananticpated I dont think its wishful thinking, plus it does sounds like you need sthg that will bring you smile and peace, and maybe at the moment he is not able to give you that if his situation is that complicated. Thats jus my view x good luck with whatever you decide

It’s true I’ve got a mentally ill son who’s school refusing
I have my own problems galore !!

Just feel sad as we were happy to start and then real life kicked in !

Maybe you can agree just to be each other’s little bubble of joy for now among all the tough stuff going on? Not all relationships have to automatically have a ‘potentially forever’ label stuck on them. I’m sorry to hear about your DS, I hope you have some support 💐

Badbaddog
You’d hope that , and I’d love that
But men I think handle stress differently to women
Or the men I meet handle it different to me

I feel a bit sad and teary to be honest

Ah well have a big hug from me at least @Thisisworsethananticpated 💐

Ah thanks
I read something that said if you are sad about something , allow it
And even for a month he made me happy so I’m sad about losing that - Christ I was only crying about the last one on January 1st
6 weeks and here we are again!

Yes, sit with the sadness for a while and gradually it will fade. The fact you were happy having him in your life for a month is good I think - shows you can be happy, even among all the difficulties in your life.

@cravingthelook

So I decided - I didn't need Valentine's Day romance from anyone but myself.

I got emailed a mega deal on 30 roses by an online florist I've used before for delivery tomorrow (based on the discount they clearly didn't sell as many bouquets as they thought) so tomorrow I'll get a lovely bouquet to me. I even gave myself a nice note.

You are always who you've needed. You've always taken care of yourself; you still being here is proof. All the love in the world exists within you. Hold onto it, Appreciate it, feel it. You are enough.

I hope you all use today to give yourself some love.

I love this.

I hope you're enjoying them 💖

Badbaddog
Hehx3
Daydreamscometrue

Thanks for being so sweet today

Trying to keep up with the thread but not doing such a good job

Just wanted to say really sorry you've been through the mill @catinthehat and @Thisisworsethananticpated

Hi @ButterflyOfShay and @HairyArsedMan good to see you around

Not much to add here except I'm in a relationship and I can feel out of practice I am

I'm great at sex 🤪 but not so good at anything else ... just going to keep on keeping on and seeing how it all pans out. He's pretty bloody wonderful. But with kids and exes and my own baggage in the mix ... it's something quite different to the last time I got close and committed to someone!

@BelladiMamma that's great you are still with the lovely Mr D, how was valentines?

Ah thats okay @Thisisworsethananticpated we got you 💪🏻 I do have a mindset that next one will be even better. You go and learn what you want and need, and what you definitely dont want. No point to set yourself for mediocre arrangement when it can be awesome. Beginning should be easy, hills to overcome can come later.
Thats my take anyway. Emotions come and go and sadness you feel now will not last that long. Its better to walk away early when you feel sthg is not right- less heartache. X

Thank you @Thisisworsethananticpated I don’t think I’ve ever been told I’m sweet before! As @Hehx3 says, every experience is a learning opportunity on your way to having your life the way you want it. There are ups and downs, but the overall trajectory is up I hope

[quote Eesha]@BelladiMamma that's great you are still with the lovely Mr D, how was valentines?[/quote]
We had a lovely day. Small gifts and cards were exchanged and on a naughty Bella whim we went to a sex shop 🤪

@BelladiMamma I dare not ask!

BelladiMamma
So good about the sex 😁
Agree handling the kids and exes is quite something , I didn’t have this in my 20s
I don’t want to use the term baggage , but I’ve been mindful I have a lot
A lot