Team Ioan Gruffudd or Alice Evans?

[BabyBearRus]

I've been following the story around the breakup of Ioan and Alice. I haven't been a great fan of Alice in the past, but I do feel for her and her children right now. Who else thinks that Ioan has behaved atrociously to his family? According to his wife, he has been having an affair for a long while, and making her feel as though she was in the wrong for months.

@BarefootHippieChick

Also, I do know in some American states having sex with anyone else while still legally married is classed as adultery, even if you're separated.

Crikey we are giving this weight are we?

@Cheeseandlobster

Hmm. Yes. It's not very clear what a mistress is exactly in today's time but it wasn't a wise choice of words imo.

Im not the judge but personally i think it suggests the husband is hiding it from his wife and that he wants it to stay hidden. So therefore still invested into survival of marriagè. Unlike IG

@Cheeseandlobster

Hmm. Yes. It's not very clear what a mistress is exactly in today's time but it wasn't a wise choice of words imo.

No I don't think it was either. Tbh does anyone still use the term anyway, even for affairs? It does sound very 1950s

Its such a patriarchal slur to KEEP calling the out in the open girlfriend of your separated husband a mistress. Makes her look like she's implying she has a scarlet letter.
Wish she could see this.

This all reminds me of when my father left my mother for OW when I was 21...they'd been married 23 years, and the last 10 at least had been awful for all of us. I've posted here before that my father went as far as trying to trick my mother to taking us back to our home country, without him when I was 11, that's how little he wanted to still be married to her. When that didn't work he waited until my younger brother turned 18 and then left.

This was late 80s, so luckily social media didn't exist, but if it had...my mother would have been doing exactly the same as Alice. As it was, as the only daughter I had to bear the full brunt of my mother's anger towards my father - she didn't hold anything back out of deference to the fact that he was still my father, she told me stuff about their marriage that I really shouldn't have been exposed to. She emotionally blackmailed myself and my two brothers into going total no contact with my father.

That was 32 years ago...Alice is stupid if she thinks that her two daughters are 'just going to forget about it'...thanks to social media they will never be able to. Yes IG has behaved badly, but now so has she. I don't think women should just be silent about how badly men behave, but for fuck's sake you choose your audience better!

Oh lord, I've just read about this after seeing the Lorraine interview.

I can definitely see why she is out to try and destroy him because he was a shite husband. But it clearly isn't doing her any good and he probably won't care all that much.

I get why people say that the dignified silence thing only benefits the cheating partner. But I hate any sort of drama. So I know going down this road would have sent me over the edge. I would have to keep a dignified silence for my own mental health I think.

There are a lot of shit men about and maybe even more so in Hollywood. It would be nice is one of them got their comeuppance and saw the error of their ways etc, but I don't think this is going to be the result.

I'm actually surprised he's famous enough to be in LA! What is he in except Hornblower and Titanic??

I just saw her on Lorraine. She is obviously very very upset and in torment. So I do feel sorry for her. It is awful being in her position after being with somebody a long time but looks to me he probably tried to end the relationship and she was in denial.

According to AE he was secretly dating Bianca while before the separation, so that would make her a 'mistress', wouldn't it? If it's true.

But I don't know how much credibility I'd give to AE's timeline, it's chopped and changed a lot.

I've read the thread on Tattle with screenshots of her tweets, it's like watching someone get very drunk after a break up and spending the evening crying and calling him a bastard, except now he knows how bothered they are as it's all over social media. It's a car crash. All the people egging her on are not helping her, they just like the drama, it isn't their life and family at stake. I understand she is upset, but it's best to rant in private, then you can't say anything you can't undo and later regret. If she wanted to not stay silent, she would have been better to put a single, dignified statement saying that she was saddened at the end of her marriage and had a difficult time. I feel very sorry for her children, it's not good for them.

He may have been shit/cheated but her public statements are U and likely to be at least as bad for their DC as his actions.

She doesn't have to vent on SM, but it's up to her, she's obviously doing it for a reason, maybe partly to resurect her public profile as well as being scorned.

As far as LG is concerned, he's a twat, has abandonned his wife and children and is having a mid life crisis dating someone 20 years younger.

Tale as old as time but he's fooling no one if he thinks people will believe his version of events. He and his PR are trying to control the situation but I don't think Alice is going to take this lying down.

I'm sure his children as well, are far more upset about him leaving them than the actions of their mother.
They will blame him for their mother's loss of control and mental state.

I think they know their mother wouldn't abandon them, as he has done.

He's risking an awful lot for this Biannca.

I think they know their mother wouldn't abandon them, as he has done.

Really? Do you?

There is no evidence whatsoever that Ioan Gruffud has done anything other than want to leave his marriage. Alice Evans has said that she wouldn't let him see his daughters on arranged access, so withholding access. He has not 'abandoned' his children.

She has made numerous threats on social media with regard to delaying a divorce, claiming spousal support for the rest of her life and withholding access to the children. It could be that he is keeping quiet in an attempt not to inflame the situation further.

I don't feel sorry for her at all. I think she's fanning the flame, being egged on by her 'supporters' and she needs to have a long hard think about what she's doing.

@MichelleScarn

Well she's been discarded and humilliated on a world stage and shes still not flown over and dumped them in his lap whist he posts pictures and inflamatory remarks on SM.

I'd say this woman has always taken full responsibility of these children and he has always been an ego driven arse who expects that his mother and his PR machine can mop up his mistakes, oh and his stupid females friends who have posted encouraging remarks because they are 'in' on the devaluing of this isolated woman.

And people are saying she has behaved badly, she's been neglected for years by the sounds of it whilst he has been having a high old time.

Just because you are a celebrity doesn't mean you should not have integrity to the people who are around you. Many celebrities have morals and values which they uphold.

He's treated her very badly and I'm sure there's many in his profession who think the same.

@onthedunes Just because you are a celebrity doesn't mean you should not have integrity to the people who are around you. Many celebrities have morals and values which they uphold.
Does this go for AE too? Have you seen some of her older, viscious tweets at people prior to her using this situation as an excuse?

@MichelleScarn

No I havn't seen older tweets, how far back are we going and who to?

But her past mental health could have some bearing on the type of man she was living with.

I've genarally found the more content, laid back, easy going, happy and affable people tend to have supportive partners in the background.

I believe she did a lot more supporting of him and his needs than he did of her. I would bet money on it.

He's also a mummy's boy, hiding behind his mother's apron strings, fancy wheeling her out stating he wasn't having an affair.
How the hell does she know.

Alice just needs him to be honest and treat her with some respect, she is the mother of his children.
It's the gaslighting that's killing her and the fact others have lied and covered up for him.

he's fooling no one if he thinks people will believe his version of events. He and his PR are trying to control the situation

who expects that his mother and his PR machine can mop up his mistakes, oh and his stupid females friends who have posted encouraging remarks because they are 'in' on the devaluing of this isolated woman

@Onthedunes there is no evidence this has been the case though, he has been extremely quiet about the whole thing and only released one photo. Where are you getting the PR controlling the situation for him from?

The "encouraging to devalue another woman" thing is also erroneous.

Please do go back through the thread to read some of what she has shared online and the Tattle threads (while unpopular here) seem to have done a good job at documenting what has gone on. They've captured screenshots of practically everything and when you see the whole thing it's actually not showing Alice Evans in a very good light at all.

When you go beyond the surface of what she is telling the world via SM and interviews it does read as she was possibly abusive to her husband. She is possibly suffering from something mental health or addiction wise but she's shown quite a nasty side to herself over the years it seems.

She's not as sympathetic as she comes across initially. I'm withholding judgement on him because what's there to judge so far apart from speculation? What I can see is that he is trying hard to be there for his daughters and that is commendable at least.

All weepy and baby voiced on tv and her venomous self on Twitter 🙄

Again ohthe you seem to either think or actually have a lot of background knowledge about what's going on for IG and AE? How the hell does she know. re his mother, how the hel do you know the opposite?

That tv appearance was awful. And yes, is she really so naive she is praising social media, or was that a narrative "everybody who is nice supports ME"

[quote Onthedunes]@MichelleScarn

Well she's been discarded and humilliated on a world stage and shes still not flown over and dumped them in his lap whist he posts pictures and inflamatory remarks on SM.

I'd say this woman has always taken full responsibility of these children and he has always been an ego driven arse who expects that his mother and his PR machine can mop up his mistakes, oh and his stupid females friends who have posted encouraging remarks because they are 'in' on the devaluing of this isolated woman.

And people are saying she has behaved badly, she's been neglected for years by the sounds of it whilst he has been having a high old time.

Just because you are a celebrity doesn't mean you should not have integrity to the people who are around you. Many celebrities have morals and values which they uphold.

He's treated her very badly and I'm sure there's many in his profession who think the same.[/quote]
Looking after your children doesn’t just mean allowing them to live under your roof. I meant looking after their mental welfare. She’s using their hurt feelings publicly to get to Ioan, and even said they ‘won’t be thinking about this in 15 years’ so what does it matter?! She won’t let Ioan see them, so you can’t do the whole ‘deadbeat dad’ thing. Alienating your kids from their dad and making their private heartbreak public, is not good parenting.

As for devaluing women, Alice is doing that nicely for herself. This is not a feminist stand against cheating disloyal husbands; this is Alice lashing out and trying to justify it by making out there is some moral or altruistic reason for it. Would somebody who values woman:

1. Show so little regard for the mental health of their 2 daughters
2. Call other women (not just Bianca but women who have merely liked Ioan’s status) fat & ugly
3. Picked a fight with her mother in law on social media (not Ioan’s dad though I notice)
4. Blame what she calls ‘the mistress’ more than the ex husband

As for being neglected, there is a MN dichotomy whereby wealthy men should financially take care of their family & not let their stressed out (and in Alice’s case, physically unwell) wives try to juggle work and home if they can afford to let them be a SAHM. However if the couple split that then turns into ‘he kept her at home and neglected her to further his own career’. Unless he refuses to pay fair CMS and whatever else he owes her, there is no reason to believe the latter. Many couples come to this arrangement, I would love to stay at home with my child if my husband earned enough but that isn’t the case for us. Lucky her. Anyway whatever hope she had left of a career she is dashing with her current behaviour.

As for the ‘many in his profession’, where are they? Not a single person has spoken out in support of her. She has no friends. Why is that? The only people who have ventured anything like an opinion have supported Ioan.

Making a scapegoat out of Ioan won’t punish your exes, ladies. Nor will it shame your husbands into staying with you if they don’t want to. You can’t create a movement against husbands leaving their wives, even for younger women. Anyone is free to leave a relationship at any time and for any reason according to MN… apart from when it’s a man leaving a woman past the age of 40, then it’s ‘abandonment’ and he’s ‘discarding her’, or worse, being an arse

In supporting Alice you’re making the ‘aggrieved ex wife club’ look nothing but bitter & vindictive - stop trying to justify her appalling behaviour with ‘well he did dump her’. That would never wash if the sexes were reversed and you know it.

Well said Glassofshloer 👏🏼

Absolutely glass this rhetoric that the female must be supported and lauded no matter what her behaviour is ridiculous.

When I found out my ex was cheating on me, I wanted to put posters up (pre social media) around town telling everyone what a shit he was , my head was all over the place and my thinking was erratic and irrational . My friend talked me out of it thank goodness but if social media had been around then , I’m sure I’d have posted all over it. The betrayal really sends you to a bad place mentally.