Dating thread 216 ... spooky fun in cuffing season

[BelladiMamma]

Hi everyone

Can someone else please copy and paste the rules as my screenshot is crap 💩

[quote Moopyhereagain]@FabulousMrFifty tbh an ical and directions sent would send me running for the hills- but different strokes. Hope she confirms.[/quote]
I'd like the time and place arranged and communicated. An ical thing wouldn't help me because I don't use any calendar (except for work). Directions - maybe a comment like "I've been here before, it's best to go down the high street and park up x side road", but a Google map pin would make me a bit 🤨

@Moopyhereagain @BelladiMamma
No & Yes, we did once miss a restaurant reservation because she was late, so I did (half jokingly) say I would send her an ICal next time

[quote FabulousMrFifty]**@Moopyhereagain* @BelladiMamma*
No & Yes, we did once miss a restaurant reservation because she was late, so I did (half jokingly) say I would send her an ICal next time[/quote]
Sounds like you're over functioning to compensate for her unreliability. Ugh, not somewhere I like to be at all. Good luck 🤞🏽 with this one

I'm a long term lurker and love the warmth and support of this thread. Just want to have a bit of a vent..had 3 dates with 3 irons this week...I'm on annual leave so had some time! I've basically spent three evenings listening to men talk about themselves at length, but I don't think any of them could tell you much about me . The guy I met last night was great looking and smart but talked about himself non stop. We had had a video chat and texted before meeting and early on I told him my job ..later he said he had forgotten so I jokingly said I was a dinner lady..no disrespect to dinner ladies whatsoever but I had been saying how much I hated cooking and feeding children earlier so it was kind of a silly joke. I had also talked about travelling for work and three hour meetings etc . Anyway, he didn't ask me anything about my job and after we met he said he thought I really was a dinner lady..just makes me think he hadn't heard or listened to anything I had said about my work and wasn't interested. He also talked for half an hour in minute detail of how he got his dog but not slightest bit interested in asking me anything about my dog . He wants to see me again but I just feel like I could be any generic woman ..pleasant, listening but interchangeable if you see what I mean as none of the blokes showed any interest in getting to know me! I am a good listener, love finding out about people but like a bit of give and take and a bit of humour too. Is it just me? Im grumpy this morning and I just want to give up.

@jojojoeyjojo Rant away, I hear you. I like it when other people offer up things about themselves, because I always worry about prying or pushing too hard, but there really is a line, isn't there? If they don't want to know about your life too, they may as well stay home and stare at the bloody mirror!

I shall share in your grumpiness this morning. Let's grump together!

Haha, I may rename myself 'Out of date67' as I thought an iCal was a going to be a break down of the calories in meals on the restaurant menu !!
@FabulousMrFifty if you're willing to take the gamble that Ms Business may confirm last minute and a night out is better than a night in then see what happens. But it wouldn't be okay for me. I'm afraid she's definitely not treating you as a priority. And now you're one of us we don't take kindly to that sort of stuff. You come across with warmth and humour in your posts and you deserve someone who appreciates all that you have to offer.

@theworldsastage thank you for joining me in grumpy solidarity!

@BelladiMamma
You are absolutely bloody right of course !
One of those can’t see the woods for the trees moments!

What’s really frustrating is I could message her and say l’ll be over 7 with Pizza, beer & wine, and I’m sure that would work, but I suspect she has actually forgotten / slipped her mind.

Oh well, looks like beer 🍺 & pizza 🍕 at my mine tomorrow…

@theworldsastage, brilliant boundaries, you should be super proud of yourself, even if it's feeling a bit crap this morning.
@jojojoeyjojo, this is a really consistent observation by many of the women on here. It's sounds like you got extra unlucky to have 3 of them in a row. 4th time lucky ? it can be a case of keeping on keeping on and taking breaks when you need a bit of time out.

Hey, as we get close to 1k can someone please be ready to get the next thread lined up 😊

I'm noticing what's going on with my emotions a bit. I'm bargaining with them, asking them to wait until an 'appropriate' time to unleash themselves. That I'm starting to idealise MrA even though I hardly know him, so I'm lining up my emotions like a bunch of naughty school kids and telling them to wait until term is over before they have fun.

Tbh, it would be way too early to get emotional with MrA, but it's almost like I'm slipping into that old masochistic routine of, 'oooh he's too busy I mustn't bother him with my feelings', that I had with my ex.

Just noting it here. And noting that it's too early to think any more of MrA than that he's fun and attentive and we have great sex and yes he also happens to be bloody busy, but busy usually means interesting too.

@jojojoeyjojo great to have you on board, vent away anytime, everyone on here is really helpful

@jojojoeyjojo

I'm a long term lurker and love the warmth and support of this thread. Just want to have a bit of a vent..had 3 dates with 3 irons this week...I'm on annual leave so had some time! I've basically spent three evenings listening to men talk about themselves at length, but I don't think any of them could tell you much about me . The guy I met last night was great looking and smart but talked about himself non stop. We had had a video chat and texted before meeting and early on I told him my job ..later he said he had forgotten so I jokingly said I was a dinner lady..no disrespect to dinner ladies whatsoever but I had been saying how much I hated cooking and feeding children earlier so it was kind of a silly joke. I had also talked about travelling for work and three hour meetings etc . Anyway, he didn't ask me anything about my job and after we met he said he thought I really was a dinner lady..just makes me think he hadn't heard or listened to anything I had said about my work and wasn't interested. He also talked for half an hour in minute detail of how he got his dog but not slightest bit interested in asking me anything about my dog . He wants to see me again but I just feel like I could be any generic woman ..pleasant, listening but interchangeable if you see what I mean as none of the blokes showed any interest in getting to know me! I am a good listener, love finding out about people but like a bit of give and take and a bit of humour too. Is it just me? Im grumpy this morning and I just want to give up.

I had a run of these too. Sometimes they're worth a second chance because it's just nerves. Also, what can be worse is someone fishing for details about you too early. That's never great either.

Did someone say McDreamy dies????? It's on telly here we must be years behind the UK. It's on in german which is a hoot but really does he die? 🥺

Loads of posts to take in! Hope to reply later got to let that news sink in...

@Onesmallstep67

Haha, I may rename myself 'Out of date67' as I thought an iCal was a going to be a break down of the calories in meals on the restaurant menu !! *@FabulousMrFifty* if you're willing to take the gamble that Ms Business may confirm last minute and a night out is better than a night in then see what happens. But it wouldn't be okay for me. I'm afraid she's definitely not treating you as a priority. And now you're one of us we don't take kindly to that sort of stuff. You come across with warmth and humour in your posts and you deserve someone who appreciates all that you have to offer.

So I caved and messaged Ms Business with a simple, “what are we doing tomorrow “ kinda message. Almost immediately got a “oh sorry FabulousMrFifty can’t do tomorrow I’ve got blah blah blah on “

Urgh bloody woman, (no offence),

@Naimee87

Did someone say McDreamy dies????? It's on telly here we must be years behind the UK. It's on in german which is a hoot but really does he die? 🥺

Loads of posts to take in! Hope to reply later got to let that news sink in...

I'm glad I'm not watching whatever this is because that's clearly a MASSIVE spoiler 🤦🏻‍♀️🤣

@FabulousMrFifty well there's your answer. If you can be arsed you could let her know you won't be taking things further - otherwise I'd just let it fade

@Naimee87 Nah, just me being vicious. Don't worry, here's a little McDreamy gap, but he does come back. And you do also get a McSteamy too.

@FabulousMrFifty You can 'bloody women' all you like, I did a lot of 'bloody men' last night, I'm sure it all balances out. I think it's reasonable to be busy all the time, but maybe she shouldn't be dating if she is busy all the time. I know there have definitely been periods of my professional life where I wouldn't have been able to hold down a relationship, so I deliberately stepped out of the dating game.

@BelladiMamma Sounds an awful lot like somebody caught feelings from sex...

[quote BelladiMamma]@FabulousMrFifty well there's your answer. If you can be arsed you could let her know you won't be taking things further - otherwise I'd just let it fade [/quote]
Fade

I was able to finally catch up a little and get over the shock-horror of learning that McDreamy only maybe dies?

Sorry to hear about all the rubbish date '0's ... this was posted on another thread but it really is fitting and made me giggle doesn’t half smack your self esteem to fuck ...
@VanGoghsDog with MrWG if you can pin-him down then in person are you prepared to have a chat with him about how you want things to be? I was drawn to Magnet-Man like you were/are to MrWG really really fast and after he ghosted it took me ages to get over him. Now i've let him back in i told him right from the start what i need from him for this to continue or i'll walk away as hard it would be because i love having sex with him in his truck. It'd be the best thing for my feelings in the long-run. So far we're on the same page and managing to keep in touch and see each other almost as often as we'd like. So i do think that often life circumstances can really get in the way of good connections but then both people involved should be doing everything they possibly can to see each other. @FabulousMrFifty
it sounds like MsBusiness was/is breadcrumming? and this makes it really hard to think they are completely disinterested but i just don't buy the whole 'i completely forgot' line...and i agree with belli whose said you really do come across as a funny, kind, skilled business man.
@Dazedandconfused10 glad you're feeling slightly better than yesterday and i do hope the date '0' goes well, did you say you've dyed your hair purple?
@BelladiMamma maybe you can write a new play for MrA to star in. Just out of interest what do you write, how come you weren't so keen to show him any of your creative master-pieces? If i had a truck company i'd hire Magnet-Man and give him the best truck and most easiest routes!

Sorry to those who’ve been let down or had rubbish experiences this week.

I asked my counsellor how people can throw themselves 100% in to a new relationship after a bad one without worrying it will go wrong/they'll be taken advantage of, that concept feels alien to me. We're discussing it next week

This will be gold dust! Will you share any gems of wisdom with us, please @SortingItOut?

Sounds like you're over functioning to compensate for her unreliability. Ugh, not somewhere I like to be at all.

Ugh yes something similar happened to me once. Had a relationship with someone who was completely unreliable, and what happened? I became a nag. I hate being a nag. I’m not naturally a nag. So it was the worst possible outcome - I started to feel angry with him AND HATE MYSELF too.

If i had a truck company i'd hire Magnet-Man and give him the best truck and most easiest routes!

😆

I’ve got another date coming up with my iron. Looking forward to it. Amazingly, we’re not far off the 3 month mark, so of course (based on warnings on this thread) I’m expecting it to go wrong now. But given that we see each other so infrequently, maybe it’ll stretch out longer…

Well I took my new boots back, they made my legs look stumpy and I have good legs so not a good look. Oh well flat ankle boots are a no on me it seems, maybe I'll buy that new underwear instead (MrC(ricket) won't know what's hit him that's if I get lucky on Tuesday). Although after paying out for my car the joy of shopping has gone. Back to seeing what l already have to wear on my cinema date on Tuesday.

My dates isn't happening tonight. He got in contact this morning with a lame excuse of why he hadn't been in touch much this week. Said we would go out for drinks and he gave me a location. His area not halfway. When questioned it's because he has been asked to go into work early tomorrow. So expects me to drive about an hour to him and an hour back without asking if it's okay.
We have postponed for another day. I'm not going to chase for a day.

Will catch up later but can I have some opinions please, mr Ireland has been texting again today and is keener than ever. He has said he would love to fly me over for a weekend and would take care of all costs....so on a scale of no sweat....to....silence of the lambs....what do you think?

From internet staking before I found his full name, know the firm he works for, goggle mapped his offices, and confirmed his role from company website so know independently he is who he says he is. Also had a couple of videos at the beginning. So although I've never met him I've probably got more confirmation of who he is than the date I had earlier in the week.

@pinkfondu no bloody way! Why? Why would you do this?

@pinkfondu, I’m not sure how I would feel but I guess the sensible thing to do would be only to make the trip if you have the funds/a plan in place for where you would stay and how you would get home if he wasn’t to your liking in person or things became strained or strange. It’s maybe the fact he’s offering to pay for everything that rings a couple of alarm bells because it makes you question his motives ??