Gay porn wwyd

[Earmuffsweather]

If you found out your partner of 10+ years had been watching gay porn ie men on men

[Dorigen]

@CareerConcerns1999

I would assume that, given that some straight women watch women on women, he is just interested.

The device he used is the issue imo.

Same here. What you watch porn-wise isn't necessarily a reflection on anything at all. I have no desire in RL to have a threesome in the sand dunes, for instance (not least as I don't fancy getting sand in my pants), and I'd be pretty put out if anyone challenged me for having watched it.

But if I'd been watching it on my DC's tablet and left it open for a DC to find, that's a whole different conversation and one that can't be avoided.

[DamnUserName21]

I'd seriously think about what you are willing to put up with.
A DP who watches gay porn might be acceptable to you, it might not be. What are your boundaries/limits? You need to establish if it's just watching or more than that.
I'd also emphasize that watching porn on a child's tablet is not ducking acceptable nor is the lying.
I would say this: IMO, his lying, his inappropriateness watching porn on a device accessible to a child and the porn itself are massive red flags. He is gaslighting you and I would not be surprised if he has cheated with a man or will do so in future.

[Fluffycloudland77]

He’s gay or Bi. I use dhs iPad and phone if I need to and have never seen gay porn on there.

I have an in law who used to meet up with other gay, happily married men with kids in hotel rooms for sex. God knows where their wives thought they were.

It goes on a lot.

[earsup]

check the tablet etc and talk to child....my straight friend male, likes to watch lesbian porn...and a gay friend has met so many married men over the years....usually ones from homophobic cultures...mostly west indian and african men....there are so many men in that situation...have to get married as a front.

[IrishMel]

So some are saying because he has viewed gay porn he is gay. So all women who view lesbian porn are lesbian. That is a very closed mind way of thinking. I am single and intend to stay so. But, if in a relationship would not be happy with partner viewing any porn on a regular basis. But the issue I have is your son having seen that and your husband denying it. You need to have a talk and get it sorted and talk to your son also in a way he will understand as sure he has things going through his head and would be very confusing at that age to view this. Hope fully your husband will open up to you but you need to keep an eye on things incase there is something he is not telling you.

[IfImLyingImDying]

Uses his 8 year old sons tablet to watch porn.
Doesn’t even bother to protect his son from it.
Blames it on his 8 year old son.
Homophobic.

Who cares whether he’s gay or not. Get this vile specimen out of your life!

[Slagertha]

What could an 8 year old have searched to then end up 'accidentally' clicking on gay porn? He's basically saying your Child has searched for porn when it was clearly him. He sounds delightful

[FourNaanJeremy]

@Kuachui

He's in denial. Wants to be straight but I don't know any straight man that isn't disgusted by the thought of a man on man, not anti gay just wouldn't want to see it

Really? Disgusted? I mean, I’m a straight woman but the thought of of woman on woman doesn’t ‘disgust’ me. The only people it really digusts are homophobic.

But anyway OP the greater issues are:
He watched porn on your young child’s tablet
He lied about it
He’s homophobic

That would be enough for me, never mind the genre of porn. Gay or not, he sounds awful.

[inmyslippers]

Start preparing for life as a single parent

[toocold54]

I would assume he is homosexual.

I wouldn’t have jumped to the homosexual card straight away as lots of people watch same sex porn without being gay (myself included) but if you say he is anti gay men then that is usually the biggest sign he definitely has homosexual tendencies.

What is he like as a person?
I would have that someone who is hiding their sexuality would be quite angry and unhappy.
It could be that he is bi-sexual so finds you and other women attractive but also finds men attractive too, which he’s ashamed of.

[thedancingbear]

@tarasmalatarocks

I’ve never met a 100% straight guy who didn’t find the idea of watching it repulsive. Maybe he is bi curious??

Nope, 100% straight guy here. Not interested but I don’t find the idea repulsive,

You should stop consorting with homophobes.

[CrystalBird]

You need to be very careful here - it's a safeguarding issue really and your son only has to say something at school ...

There's two separate issues. One is your husband viewing gay porn .. may or may not be gay, only you know him. As it's not a first 'offence' I'd be thinking he was gay

The other issue is him using your son's tablet to access it and then blaming him for it. I mean, come on. Did you son see much of it? It's really damaging and scary for little kids to view porn. What have you done to ensure your child is ok?

[MMmomDD]

OP - there is not much you can do about it, but wait and watch. He won’t admit anything.
You can, of course, divorce over it.

How is your relationship otherwise? Is there closeness and intimacy?

[sleepyhoglet]

Doesn't mean he is gay. Watching on a child's device is so wrong though.

[reallyscaredof]

No straight guy I know can watch gay (man) porn. They do like lesbians, though 😉

[sapo2000]

@MMmomDD

OP - there is not much you can do about it, but wait and watch. He won’t admit anything.
You can, of course, divorce over it.

How is your relationship otherwise? Is there closeness and intimacy?

I agree. IF he is really gay, he will not admit it. Based on my experience described above, you will have to 'discover' it by yourself. In the end, I was felt 'lucky' because I manage I manage to discover the enough evidence to confront him which that 'released' me from a very unhappy marriage and full of lies.

[sapo2000]

Corrected version: 'I agree. IF he is really gay, he will not admit it. Based on my experience described above, you will have to 'discover' it by yourself. In the end, I always felt 'lucky' because I managed to discover enough evidence to confront him. This 'released' me from a very unhappy and full of lies marriage.

[EKGEMS]

Damn he's a pathetic liar isn't he?

[FluffyWhiteBird]

@Earmuffsweather

Hes not admitted it was him he’s saying our son must have clicked on it

Are you saying you believe him?

[Fluffypastelslippers]

@MMmomDD

OP - there is not much you can do about it, but wait and watch. He won’t admit anything.
You can, of course, divorce over it.

How is your relationship otherwise? Is there closeness and intimacy?

He has exposed their 8 year old child to pornography

There is plenty she can and should do about it.

[Earmuffsweather]

@FluffyWhiteBird no but i mean he will not admit it

[CrumpetStrumpet]

Your husband has accessed porn through your eight year old sons device. The genre of porn is the least of your worries. Your main concern should be that your married to a man willing to traumatise and potentially damage your son as long as he can get his rocks off. I couldn't stay married to a man like that.

Also how could it possibly have been your son? I'm assuming you safeguard him by ensuring there are parental locks on his device? Therefore that's all you need to say to your husband to prove his guilt.

Also I'd leave him for the fact that he's homophobic alone. He will pass his horrible views onto your little boy

[FluffyWhiteBird]

He doesn't have to admit it. You can believe what you believe, without his permission to believe it or his agreement that you're right. This is about what you think, what you feel and what you're going to do about it. He's done something that could possibly get your DS removed from your care. This is about what's right for you and your DS, it's not about your husband's feelings or wants. His feelings and wants aren't your problem to solve at all.

[ShoesEverywhere]

Does your son's tablet have and sort of parental controls on it? Is he allowed to use it unsupervised? If so I would definitely get parental controls sooner rather than later - did you know that the average age a child first sees online porn is 11?

[youvegottenminuteslynn]

So at best he's openly homophobic and also willing to lie and blame your eight year old son for his actions.

He sounds like an absolute prick.