Be honest. If a man expected you...
to split the bill on a first date would it put you off?
The thread has widened in scope -the OP was talking about a first date.
When I was a student, and we were all equally poor, it was unsaid that each would pay their own way (I’m a man) and if it developed into a relationship then both typically would continue paying their own way. The exception was that if one or the other was in the money -eg birthday/ generous granny -perhaps then he/she would volunteer.
I’ve done a lot of OLD since those days, and often the issue doesn’t arise because the cost is not significant if the date is not an expensive outing. A woman once said to me “the purpose of a first date is to see if it’s worth having a second date” -very true, so coffee/cake or a simple lunch /evening drink is best. Neither wants to invest a lot of time or money if a first date isn’t going to go anywhere.
With OLD, the relationship begins absolutely equally -you are both on a site having paid the fees and for the same reason, and you agree to meet for a date. One may be the first to suggest you meet but the man does not “ask the woman one out” in an old-fashioned sense, so there’s no suggestion that the woman is doing the man a favour.
It’s happened sometimes though that for one reason or another my first or next early dates have been costly and typically I’ve offered to pay, because it’s the polite thing to do and generally the woman accepts. But it’s a problem if you’re doing a lot of first/second dating and the cost mounts up.
In my experience when they meet up both people are roughly aware of the others financial circumstances (job, child maintenance, home ownership/renting) so can be sensitive to the other and will offer to split. During and after my divorce I was struggling financially this was very true.
I would find it a turn-off if a woman had an entitled attitude and saw it as her right to be paid for early in a relationship. I have generally dated women of equal professional and financial status to me so there has been no disparity. I have lived through generations of feminism and independent women so am aware of the problem that they quite rightly are wary of men paying and because of it expecting a return for their money (ie sex.)