I'm in a relationship with a Turkish man for the last 11 months and I saw another side to him last month. To make a long story short his ex who's married now from Turkey contacted him and he basically told me to accept it or walk away. I couldn't accept it but I also couldn't walk away. He had been perfect and amazing up until then. He treated me great I felt so lucky.
He wanted to marry her 10 years ago in Turkey but her family got Involved and didn't accept it so it didn't happen. He's 39 and I turned 30 on Sunday.
Well we argued like crazy for a whole month. Things got heated and I stressed him so much because of her he was real nasty to me. In the car he went crazy and started smashing everything up, he ripped off the mirror and ripped off the sun viser, he banged the windows and I was scared he would turn his anger on me I got out the car and he just left me in the rain.
2 days later he grabbed my leg and squeezed so hard I had a bruise that turned purple and is still there faded to this day. He grabbed me by my neck and warned me to shut up before he harms me. That's all he's done to me and I'm not making excuses but he hasn't touched me since and things are good now.
Not long after this incident I decided to walk away and I did and he came running a few days later telling me he's blocked her and won't talk to her again and he wants to be how we were before. He said that's not him what he did to me he was just too stressed and I was fighting with him all month he blew. I believe him and for the last 2 weeks we've been good.
However, last week I'm late for my period and tested - positive. Although doctors think I'm either having an ectopic pregnancy or a miscarriage as they can't find a baby in the sac. I got more tests and a scan Tuesday. I haven't told nobody that I'm pregnant though.
I have an auntie (my mums sister) and my uncle her husband who are like my parents. They are amazing.
They've been there through mt really dark times 2 years ago and have been there for me ever since.
My dad who was amazing died when I was 17 and my mum I don't have a relationship with her she is just evil. So to have them I knew I could run to them when a problem occurred and they'd support me.
Well, i went to visit them yesterday and my auntie said she'd like to talk to me. She didn't say it horrible but she said for her and my uncles well being I'm not welcome at their home anymore for as long as I am with him. Because I told them everything he had done to me and she said they are being effected seeing me hurt and they can't deal with it. She said if they don't see me they won't know. What they don't know doesn't hurt. She said she can't accept me with him and they worry over me so much. My uncle more than her as he's more emotional. She said they will always be there for me but only when and if I decide to get rid of him for good. And she said if I do and text her saying it's over with him she said don't expect a reply straight, she'll need time to find out if I am serious because I always say it's over and end up back a few days later. They said their door is closed for me now whilst I'm with him and I completely understand why they are doing this. They both hugged me when I left and told me to please think and do the right thing.
They've tried helping me and advising me but I just listen to myself and want what I want.
I know the right thing is to walk away since seeing that side to him last month. But on the other hand I have hope he will change and things will be amazing again. I want him and have strong feelings for him to walk away to please my family would hurt me but then choosing to stay with him means losing my family and I don't have nobody.
One part of me is saying choose him because that's what you want and to hell with everyone else if they can't accept that because I won't be happy leaving him at the moment. But another part is saying choose your family they care so much about me and will always be there for me.
I was at his last night upset but I can't tell him what's going on because it's about picking and choosing him or them. My family didn't say to make a decision they just said when and if I decide to get rid of him then I'd be more than welcome back there. They haven't said make a choice but just think about it and what's for the best.
Any advice? Please take into consideration that I am like starting to love this man, and I wear my heart on my sleeve. I always see the best in people and give chances to change in hope they do. What if I walk away now and he really did change? All sorts of things going through my head! :(