My partner says my son is the most horrible child he has ever met

[Owldeb2005]

My ds is 15 and is not an angel but lazy and spoiled as some teenagers seem to be. My partner went mad yesterday because ds had gone to play football with his friend and he is not allowed to go on his PS4 during the day. After work I started cleaning and did not see his calls until later. He wanted a lift home because his frien had hurt his leg. My partner said I should not pick him up when I saw the message because he was just being lazy. In the meantime he had tried everyone else and ended up calling my dad who doesn’t drive but my uncle lives there and he brought them back. My partner went mental saying how disgusting it was to ask like that and how he is a horrible child and a spoiled jumped up little c••t. I don’t think he did anything wrong but when I say that I am a bad parent and am turning him into a horrible person.
I am at my wits end with it because it is ranting a lot of the time when my son is with me.

Your partner's behaviour seems absolutely extreme and out of proportion and unreasonable.

[quote Owldeb2005]@jackstini he does live with me and I am constantly treading on eggshells when my son is here. He doesn’t rant at my son he does it at me and it is very stressful[/quote]

Kick DP out! Presumably he isn't on the tenancy/mortgage?

[quote Owldeb2005]@jackstini he does live with me and I am constantly treading on eggshells when my son is here. He doesn’t rant at my son he does it at me and it is very stressful[/quote]
Read that back

Don't live your life on eggshells - you and your ds deserve more. Time for partner to go

Does he have children of his own?

His attitude and behaviour is strange and crazy.

Your nasty partner is trying to get your DS out of the house.
He wants to be the sole male.

Please consider if you really want to lose your son? He sounds ok from what you have posted.

I can see the attitude your partner has towards your DS really damaging to the lad.
Please remove that excuse for a man from your teenagers home.

Your son did nothing wrong.

Your partner on the other hand, needs to be an ex very soon. No way would I put up with that level of hatred against my child.

Your Ds sounds like my teenage son. If your ds's behaviour isn't upsetting anyone but your 'd'p, then it's him who has the issue. This is not your fault.

And fwiw, if someone spoke to me about my Ds the way your dp spoke to you, he'd be out the door.

You do not need to live on eggshells. Your Ds deserves a loving home. Your partner needs to leave. Please think of yourself and your Ds

Your partner is the problem. Get rid instantly.

Your son sounds completely normal. He is kind to help his friend, I’m glad he feels supported at home enough to call you when he needs help. Don’t let another man’s influence change that.

Sounds like your DP has massively over-reacted to something really minor here!!

How long have you been together? Has he been around in a parental role for years or is he a relatively new addition?

Sorry but your son said his friend was hurt and you didn't even go to check?

I'm confused about what the PS4 issue has to do with it. And why it's so terrible for your kid to want a lift home from his mates.

Sounds to me like your partner just has no patience and so can't cope with a teenager and so has turned abusive. Poor kid. You need to protect your son from your nasty, impatient, red faced partner.

Your 'D'P is the cunt, not your son. Do the right thing and LTB.

@Letthelightoflove. It is definitely not all about me I worry about how this makes my ds feel and am looking for somewhere to move out to as my partner has been threatening to my ex husband too. I worry that he will go and sort him out if we split and I don’t want to be responsible for that or let ds have to deal with that

In what way is your son the most horrible child he ever met.

At 15 i'd expect the most horrible child someone had ever met to be in juvenile prison, with a history of violence and petty crime.

Your son does things like ask fir a lift home from football.

And partly or fully cause his mate had a sore leg.

Sorry, but your partners bonkers .. he's not relationship material anyway bit he's particularly not relationship material for a mum.

If you had seen the messages, would you have gone to help you DS do a good thing, despite what DP was saying?

I can't imagine refusing anyone that request, certainly not a child and certainly not my son.

He is abusive to both you and your child.

Walking on eggshells at home is very damaging to chiildren and your son will be aware of the atmosphere.

What he sees will effect how he views you and women in general.

Usually I open these threads knowing that more often than not, the mum is defending pretty awful behaviour and excusing it as "they're just being high spirited" etc. But this isn't a surly bad behaving teen situation. It's a 15 year old who desperately needed a lift home. Your partner may see shitty, god awful entitled behaviour from your child the rest of the time but this was not it.

Your partner is out of order.

as my partner has been threatening to my ex husband too

So he's all round volatile, threatening, nasty and unreasonable.

Mate, come on ...

@LittleMysSister he has been around for about 3.5 years. He has no kids but is always telling me that all his friends think his behaviour is disgusting and that I am a bad parent.

Lose the partner, obviously
I can't even believe it's a question

Oh also he only has to wait a couple more years until your son is his size. 17/18 - then watch him try and speak to your son like that after he's suffered years of being called a cunt. I can guarantee they will come to blows.

Make your partner leave before it gets to that point and while you can salvage your relationship with your son.

Relationship over for me I’m afraid. I’d want my son to know I’m putting him first.

I'm glad if you're planning to split from him. Please do ASAP.

Why do you feel you cannot leave? Are there financial reasons that you are staying with him? You seem very aware that he is abusive.

He is no angel and teens can be very trying. But, no partner would call my child a jumped up little "c**t and still be living with me. He needs to learn to curb it as the adult.
Time to protect your child I'm afraid. And yourself for that matter if you're walking on eggshells.